Just because some of us are horneyallthetime!
... and yes I have been involved in a long term 'clandestine' relationship long ago in past. It was exciting and dangerous as was mentioned previously. Sharon was very adventerous and did stuff with me that my long ago ex wife would not participate in... Sharon was also married as well so I guess that made us feel safe about it in a strange kind of way.
These days I fantasize, but I will not cheat on my girlfriend. It would leave me with a very dirty feeling and I would not know how to deal with that feeling very well. Also, I just have no desire to be that hurtful towards her. It would suck.
I second that: being ignored by those who are on your "friends ' list. It happens a lot.
I don't know how it can peg you to a Beatle's song in 5 questions, but I was thinking if I was a son this would have been it. How wild...
You Are Helter Skelter
You are loud, rebellious, and prone to make a bit of a scene.
You have major problems with authority. You hate being told what to do.
You are independent and adventurous. Life is a wild ride, and you aren't afraid to jump on the roller coaster.
You are outrageous, honest, and sometimes shocking. You say what you feel and expect the same of others.
My take on this is that if I were in your position, I would work hard to accept the reality of his words. I've had to do this in the past in my relationships romantic and otherwise.
To me the reality of this situation is that his feelings are far different than yours. In the past I have never received a straight answer for the question 'Why?' I have boggled my mined analyzing the question why, and have in recent years (the last 8 years) given up on asking 'why?' for the most part. Instead I focus on looking at the actions of the other person to understand their true feelings. If the answer is not the one I want, then I focus on myself and I focus on accepting at face value these actions and words without my forcing my feelings on them. As a friend of mine says, watch their feet. Another friend of mine tells me to not try to force square pegs into round holes.
My job is to accept the reality of situations weather I like it or not. Only by doing that can I take the actions in my life to make me happy. The process of acceptance can hurt, but I have found that living a lie and trying to force a situation hurts even more. My heart goes out to you, and I wish you the best in dealing with this.
I've done it before a few times. It was good sex, but the relationship was no different so it did not proceed. There are a couple of women I have been with that I would never consider a replay romp with even though the sex was excellent. It would bring unnecessary drama into my life.
