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girlyju
Over 90 days ago
Female, 154

Forum

Recently, my DH and i started incorporating spankings more into our sex life. At first it was occasional - like during doggie - but we've turned it up a notch. This isn't always how it happens, but this is one of my faves: He'll call on his way home from work and tell me what to wear (or not to wear), and where i should be (ie, over the armrest of the couch). He will get home, taking His time to get settled, while i lay there, anticipating. He'll go choose his device (whip, paddle, etc). At first He'll start out very lightly, rubbing me afterward. He rotates the area He spanks so that one part of me doesn't get too much. He increases the intensity slowly, while kissing me and/or talking dirty to me. Sometimes He'll bind my hands or gag me. Sometimes i'll pretend like i'm struggling against it, other times i simply enjoy.

**It's very important to have a safe word when you decide to incorporate this type of light SM. i have two safe words: One means, "i need to tell you something for real, but i don't want to necessarily stop" and the other one means, "STOP, NOW." This needs to be worked out beforehand.

i would also warn that this, especially if there is binding involved, is best done with someone you really know well and trust. Realize that you WILL be in a position of submission but it should always be pleasurable for BOTH of you.

One more thing: it is *His JOB* to create an atmosphere of trust where i can yield to the pain/pleasure. It is *my JOB* to let him know when i've reached my boundary - when good pain becomes bad pain, as they say. The threshold is different for me day-to-day. My DH *ALWAYS* respects the safe word, and thanks me afterward for using it. This feedback helps Him to create a better (hotter) atmosphere, that we both enjoy.

Anyway, it's been a REALLY fun and interesting thing to add to our sex life! If you are at all sub in anyway, I highly recommend it. Good luck! :-)