Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login

How To Be A Happy Hooker

last reply
74 replies
18.8k views
4 watchers
3 likes
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
0 likes
Well, in actual matter of fact, with luck, you may have picked up an idea or two about what not to do. The really tough part about writing is coming up with something that's works for your story. Courage.

RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
0 likes
Here you go Reverend...I'm going to post this here as a bump to your thread...

Someone just posted this in a writing group...it sort of relates to this thread, about hooking the reader in from the start...

What Makes a Winning Short Story?
http://thewritersabcchecklist.blogspot.com/2012/03/what-makes-winning-short-story.html

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
0 likes
Here you go again Rev...this just came out in the P & W newsletter...

Earlier this month, the shortlist was announced for the Caine Prize, a contest that awards a ten-thousand-pound prize for a short story.

Head over to G&A: The Contest Blog to read first lines from each of the five finalists' entries and learn more about the award, which aims to widen the global audience for new and innovative African fiction.

Five Stories From the 2012 Caine Prize Finalists
http://www.pw.org/content/five_stories_from_the_2012_caine_prize_finalists

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
0 likes
Thanks for the bump, DM, and the links. In my (very) humble opinion, the 'How To' article is first-rate.

RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
0 likes
From the P.D. James mystery, "The Private Patient"
"On November the 21st, the day of her 47th birthday and three weeks and two days before she was murdered, Rhoda Gradwin went to Harley Street to keep a first appointment with her plastic surgeon,and there, in a consulting room designed, so it appeared,to inspire confidence and allay apprehension, would make the decision which would lead inexorbly to her death."

(note: I transcribed this from a recorded version. All spelling and punctuation errors are mine. I'm not even sure if she used numbers for the date and age or spelled them out.)

To me, this is one of the best 'long' openings I've come across. It's not punchy and there are no 'action points' but IMO the average reader would never put the book down after reading that sentence.

RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
budwilliams
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
"I usually don't meet people off line, but after several hot chats with this charming young man, he convinced me it was about time I spent a little less time on the net talking about my fantasies and little more time on my back fulfilling them."

--- Meet Me In the Park
Redhot363236
hardnhot18
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
A few of my faves, since this thread's still kicking:

"The beet is the most intense of vegetables. The radish, admittedly, is more feverish, but the fire of the radish is a cold fire, the fire of discontent not of passion. Tomatoes are lusty enough, yet there runs through tomatoes an undercurrent of frivolity. Beets are deadly serious."

Tom Robbins, Jitterbug Perfume

"It was a pleasure to burn."

Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury

"The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel."

Neuromancer, William Gibson
DirtyMartini
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
0 likes
Here's one for you Reverend...not sure I would spend years writing an opening sentence, but who am I to argue with Stephen?

Why Stephen King Spends 'Months and Even Years' Writing Opening Sentences
http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2013/07/why-stephen-king-spends-months-and-even-years-writing-opening-sentences/278043/?utm_source=Publishers+Weekly&&utm_term=0_0bb2959cbb-5e3718848f-304828229

You know you want it, you know you need it bad...get it now on Amazon.com...
Lush Erotica, an Anthology of Award Winning Sex Stories
Guest
Lurker
0 likes
Quote by RumpleForeskin

From the P.D. James mystery, "The Private Patient"
"On November the 21st, the day of her 47th birthday and three weeks and two days before she was murdered, Rhoda Gradwin went to Harley Street to keep a first appointment with her plastic surgeon,and there, in a consulting room designed, so it appeared,to inspire confidence and allay apprehension, would make the decision which would lead inexorbly to her death."

(note: I transcribed this from a recorded version. All spelling and punctuation errors are mine. I'm not even sure if she used numbers for the date and age or spelled them out.)

To me, this is one of the best 'long' openings I've come across. It's not punchy and there are no 'action points' but IMO the average reader would never put the book down after reading that sentence.



I disagree with this one and a few others that are run on sentences. It's a put off, not a hook. It makes me wonder if the author forgot what they were writing.
FionaThrust
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
What a great idea for a thread; my thanks to you, RumpleForeskin.

I remember the slick first line of Graham Greene's Brighton Rock: 'Hale knew, before he had been in Brighton three hours, that they meant to murder him.'

Fiona x
'I was hot and horny as hell...'
Naked and Sexual (The Fiona Thrust Series, Episode 1)
BJintheUK
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Hiya,

Talking of hooks. I wonder if you could give me some feedback on two possible starts for a story? Here's the first and second drafts for comparison, and I'd like you to tell me which one would keep you more interested in reading the rest of it?


First Draft

The handle next to the shabby frosted glass in the office door twisted and the hinges quietly squealed as the door separated from its frame, a wooden frame around the door that carried the discoloured evidence of many previous entrants. As it opened, there appeared fingers around the edge of the door, desperate fingers that had accompanied their owner into this haven of supplication. This altar for the believers to pray for help in solving mysteries they themselves had no idea how to solve. The fingers pushed the door further open to reveal a short, middle aged man, dressed in the standard attire of old suit, mismatched tie, scuffed shoes, and the expression they all carried, one of defeat and despair.

“Hello, how can I help you?” said the smartly dressed young lady behind the desk.

“You can offer me a drink for a start!” scowled the man as he entered the room.

“OK,…. And then what?” the young lady smiled, while gesturing for the man to sit in the chair facing hers across the desk.

“Then I’ll tell you a story to make you sick to your stomach, three times over!” said the man as he turned the chair partly around and heavily dropped his be-suited frame onto it.

“Really? Well, I’d better get a bucket then, hadn't I? Will an ice bucket do?” she said as she closed the open folder that lay before her on the desk, and began to open a diary-like book to her right.

“Ha, a comedian, that’s all I need, a bloody comedian for a flatfoot. Brilliant!” he said as he watched her manicured fingers calmly moving the stationery around on the desk, mesmerised by her seeming indifference to his gruff, aggressive manner.

“Well not really brilliant. Genius maybe, but not brilliant by any means” she smiled again disarmingly, and with her right hand picked up an expensive looking fountain pen, ready to start taking notes.


Second Draft

“Hello, how can I help you?”

“You can offer me a drink for a start!”

“OK,…. And then what?”

“Then I’ll tell you a story to make you sick to your stomach, three times over!”

“Really? Well, I’d better get a bucket then, hadn't I? Will an ice bucket do?”

“Ha, a comedian, that’s all I need, a bloody comedian for a flatfoot. Brilliant!”

“Well not really brilliant. Genius maybe, but not brilliant by any means”
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
0 likes
Bob, sorry to be so long getting back to you but for some reason (probably my fault) I was no longer subscribed to my own post.

What follows is just my very humble, subjective opinion. Feel free to get back in touch to cuss, fuss, or discuss any of this.

To me, the opening isn't a strong hook. While the description of the door and its opening are well-crafted, they might be a bit too wordy and I'm not sure the focus on the door is that effective. You might try having the action seen through the protag's pov. That could add a touch of suspense with the reader wondering not only who is coming in, but who is watching.

Remember, all that's just one writer to another and the last time I checked, there were no Pulitzer's on my wall.

BTW, welcome to the land of LUSH. Always good to have someone who can recall what music was like before the Beatles (I'm 67) Best of luck.

RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
BJintheUK
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Rumble,

I can still remember a page from the New Musical Express taped on to my best friend Steve's bedroom wall. It showed two pictures, one of the Beatles, and one of the Shadows, and the text said, "The Beatles are catching up on the Shadows!". If only they knew how much and how soon?

Thank you very much for your comments. It's too easy to get lost in your own thoughts when starting a story, and it needs the cool gaze of an outside person to keep you from too much self-indulgence.

That particular starting couple of paragraphs may be used on one of several ideas I have, not for erotic stories, but for something entirely different, but I will say that as I am quite a fan of writing stories almost entirely from dialogue, I prefer my own second draft. I feel it has more impact, and piques the reader's interest into wanting to turn the page to find out what exactly is going on.

Best regards,
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
0 likes
Go for it, thyy stalwart author. ;) Looking forward to reading some of your work.

RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
ChuckEPoo
Chuckanator
0 likes
I always try to hook my readers in the first paragraph. Here is the opening of New Horizons.

For most people they want an uneventful life that holds very few surprises and we were no exception. There is a certain amount of security in developing a routine in your life. I think most of us become boring by choice. Our lives the past few years can be defined by our calendar. My wife and I go to the gym Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. We dine out almost every Friday, but occasionally try a new restaurant when we feel real adventuresome. Then there is the BBQ with our long time friends on the second Saturday of each month. I usually play racquetball at 6:30 am on Monday and Wednesday. Oh yeah, I forgot... we usually fuck on Sunday and Thursday. Probably because there is not much to watch on TV those nights. It occured to me recently that we had run out of new stories to tell because we had run out of new adventures. Little did I know how that was all about to change.
Guest
Lurker
0 likes
I think that a happy hooker should be one of two types.

1: either a manic pixie dream girl that opens up some other winning characters.....

2: Or a character that breaks the Protagonist down as seems like a troubled, contested intravert.

You can either focus on the hooker as aprotagonist and use her as a plot device to progress the story. Or you can the hooker as a plot device. It all depends what story you are trying to tell.

Hookers also make great characters, or mediums through which narratives are told.

I just watched movies called "Tangerine" and Girl lost." Both great glimpses into the world of sex workers.

I think that the main issue is motivation. The desire from something more. All hookers have dreams. The happy hooker makes the best of her situations yet dreams of something better.... The tragedy lies in when expectations are no met. I prefer tragedies, but if done right, the hooker trope can work as a sympathetic antagonist.
Verbal
Gravelly-Voiced Fucker
0 likes
Bump! Excellent thread, Bill.

I'll throw in a couple.

My absolute fave:
"Listen: Billy Pilgrim has come unstuck in time." - Kurt Vonnegut

I love the "Listen:" part most of all, especially the colon. People tend to quote the beginning of the prologue of Slaughterhouse Five ("All this happened, more or less."), and that's a great sentence too, but I love the beginning of the actual novel even more.

Also, this is non-foction, from Richard fucking Nixon's autobiography no less, but it's such a resonant line:
"I was born in the house my father built." - Richard Nixon
RumpleForeskin
The Right Rev of Lush
0 likes
Richard Nixon! Sweet mother of pearl, he exclaims. Next thing we know old Jeff will be quoting the opening lines of, "the Federalist Papers." ;)

Thanks for the 'bump' Jeff. I'll admit to being fond of this piece, in part because 'Absolute Write' paid me $20.00 for one-time online use of the original, non-Lushy, version

.
RUMPLATIONS: AwesomeHonky Tonk and Cyber Bar
Home of the Lush "IN" crowd: indecent, intoxicated, and insolvent
a place to gossip, share news, talk sports, pimp a story, piss & moan, or just grab a drink. Check it out.

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwords. -- ROBERT HEINLEIN
Burquette
Bug
0 likes
I LOVE this thread. Opening lines can be amazing.

"We went to the moon to have fun, but the moon turned out to completely suck."
~Feed, MT Anderson

"Jack Torrance thought: Officious little prick."
~The Shining, Stephen King

(And may I just say, if you use the word 'officious' and 'prick' in the same thought, that character better be a writer.)

"‘Where’s Papa going with that axe?’ said Fern to her mother as they were setting the table for breakfast.”
~ Charlotte’s Web, E.B. White

"You better not never tell nobody but God.”
~The Color Purple, Alice Walker
visioneer
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
"I was neat, clean, shaved and sober, and I didn’t care who knew it." -- from the opening paragraph of Raymond Chandler's "The Big Sleep."

"It seemed like a nice neighborhood to have bad habits in.” Raymond Chandler

Lucia Makes a Bet

Barn Dance

Shock Wave

Lokis_Sidekick
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Switching media:

Rereading this thread keeps reminding me of the movie: Throw Mama From The Train

"The night was moist." followed by the author going nuts trying to find a better adjective.

It set the tone for the rest of the story perfectly.
AlexandraRios
Rookie Scribe
0 likes
'To be born again,' sang Gobreel Farishta tumbling from the heavens, 'first you have to die.' The Satanic Verses, Salmon Rushdie.
jamieereynoldss
Rookie Scribe
0 likes
How you caught us! Thanks for the advice and for examples from the classic literature! They are really cool!
You managed to attract attention. I agree that quotes should not be used, especially in the title.
But is it worth it from the very beginning to reveal the main action for the reader?
jamieereynoldss
Rookie Scribe
0 likes
Quote by Guest
Hi, I'm new here, and a little shy, but I really like this thread.

I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show. Charles Dickens, David Copperfield.

Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in it, "and what is the use of a book," thought Alice, "without pictures or conversations?" Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland.

When the phone rang I was in the kitchen, boiling a potful of spagheti and whistling along to an FM broadcast of the overture to Rossini's 'The Thieving Magpie', which had to be the perfect music for cooking pasta. Haruki Murakami, The Windup Bird Chronicle.



My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style. Maya Angelou
I took it from https://edubirdie.com/blog/social-issues-topics
But man is not made for defeat. A man can be destroyed but not defeated. Ernest Hemingway
When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on. Franklin D. Roosevelt