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Picked-up lines

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Matriarch
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As opposed to pick up lines, have you ever said something really cheesy after being approached?

"You had me at hello."

"I thought you'd never ask."

"What took you so long."

That kind of thing.

Spill your most grimace worthy
Miss Sassy Pants
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"Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" Some jerk, who would not look me in the eyes, only my chest... asked me if he could put his dick between my breasts
Active Ink Slinger
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Does a snake have knees?
Does a bear sh_t in the woods?
If a frog had wings, his ass wouldn't hit the ground every time he hops.
Thats my name, don't wear it out.
With a friend like you, who needs enemies.
The pleasure is all mine.
You don't look a day over 25.
My, what a strong grip you have there. (during a hand shake)
No matter how big I get, I'll always look up to you.
It's not you, it's me.
Active Ink Slinger
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Quote by Hollywood3
Some jerk, who would not look me in the eyes, only my chest... asked me if he could put his dick between my breasts


Does that mean if I look you in the eyes I can......Oh no no.....

"Thats my bad'
Constant Gardener
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"Sure we could dance, except you'll have to do something with that wheelbarrow you're pushing...incidentally, is that to cart me away with or to carry your balls around in?"
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Lurker
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Quote by scooter
Does a snake have knees?
Does a bear sh_t in the woods?
If a frog had wings, his ass wouldn't hit the ground every time he hops.
Thats my name, don't wear it out.
With a friend like you, who needs enemies.
The pleasure is all mine.
You don't look a day over 25.
My, what a strong grip you have there. (during a hand shake)
No matter how big I get, I'll always look up to you.
It's not you, it's me.


heheee...i love the things you say scoot. i wanna be a Scooter Groupie smile
Lurker
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I'd love to taste you.

Ahh, Miami, what a weird little fish bowl.
Lurker
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I know it's not exactly what you were after, but one of my favourites is

"does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

Just makes me laugh!!
Lurker
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Quote by mazza
I know it's not exactly what you were after, but one of my favourites is

"does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

Just makes me laugh!!


Still laughing at that one!! I swear I'm going to use it. Mazz, you are one damn funny MILF!!
Lurker
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Male: I would die for you...
Female: Prove it

Male: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Female: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
Active Ink Slinger
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Quote by LittleMissBitch
[heheee...i love the things you say scoot. i wanna be a Scooter Groupie smile


I already am a LittleMissBitch groupie
Active Ink Slinger
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When asked to dance or sing


"It's against my religion"

"I don't perform anymore" (not to be said when someone asks if you want to fuck)
Constant Gardener
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The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Active Ink Slinger
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You know what would look good on you? Me! Said to me by a 60 year old dude when I used to wait tables!

There is a thin line between bravery & stupidity.......Don't cross it!
Take time to live, love and dream!!
You have been a naughty boy.........Now go to my room!!!
Active Ink Slinger
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Excuse me Miss, but I couldn't help noticing how attractive you think I am.
Is this love at first sight, or do I need to walk by again?