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If you got £1/$1 every time you masturbated, what could you buy?

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Quote by stephanie

Rachel Sprite.

(Just for a night. But with kissing...)

xx SF

Sprite: "You really jerk off that much?'

Me: "I'm a box-of-Kleenex-every-two-days kinda wanker..."

Sprite: "Would you pay cash or cheque?"

Me: "You don't take plastic?"

Sprite: "I don't take debit cards, Rockefeller..."

Me: "Cash then..."

Sprite: "How would I get it home?"

Me: "I'll bring it, I'll put it in your transport, you'll fucking drive the money home!"

Sprite: "But I'd need, like, a fucking MACK TRUCK to get that sort of cash home and I can't drive an articulated heavy vehicle and even if I could the driveway to our house isn't big enough to let me back it up to the garage and there's no way I'm carrying 47 trash bags full of $100 bills across the lawn and anyway..."

Me: "Forget it. I'll buy a WEEK with Dancing_Doll..."

Dancing_Doll: "Fuck you, Irish..."

Note:

"This attempt at a humorous post could be seen as sexist in that a cynic might think that I'm implying that beautiful women might sleep with odious men for money. An awful lot of fucking money, in fairness..."



Well Steph, at least they can't say you don't have taste!!
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Doesn't this question assume that the pump works? Bob Dylan once said, "Pump don't work, 'cause the vandals took the handle." So some folks have pumps that don't work. Poor bastards.
I could buy the Taj Mahal.
Normal Adjacent
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At first I thought wow if only I had that kind of money, but after doing the math it turns out not to be that much. I might be able to get a new car but not the one I really want. I better get busier.
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Viagra and a personal trainer. I already (allegedly) have the wit.
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An Aston Martin DB11
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A hooker.
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my own Super Pac.. giggles

Lurker
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more than enough to take us both shopping .. giggles

ready????

Site administrator
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Quote by trinket

Australia.



So thats worth next to nothing then?




Me... more steak and chips.
Short Arse Brit
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Quote by simplyjohn


So thats worth next to nothing then?




Me... more steak and chips.


Is that before or after you pay off your speeding fine??

Me...House next door to Henry "The Hunk" Cavill and a pair of binoculars
The Duchess of Tart

Please check out my new story, co-written with the amazing Wilful.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/long-time-coming.aspx

And my latest poem, The Temptation.

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Quote by kiera


Is that before or after you pay off your speeding fine??

Me...House next door to Henry "The Hunk" Cavill and a pair of binoculars


Thats just *mean*
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A warehouse full of Lamborghini's ??????????
High Lord of Darkness
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Quote by vanessa26
I would own................the world


Dittoo. I would at least have a private yacht, ferrari and a rather big house somewhere exotic.

I used to be a pervert. In here, I'm normal!

Watch this space...She is really - cumming soon!

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I am cursed by having a degree in engineering, so I know how to do realistic estimates and accurate math. So I could buy a Hyundai Accent, and I've been working on it for 50 years.

Some of the folks here either have an active imagination or VERY sore privates.VMCkJJmEjo3ZVJMt
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Quote by vanessa26
I would own................the world


I second that
"If it doesn't leave you breathless, sweaty and ready to fade, it's just not worth doing."
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Well since there is nothing left to buy.. I'll just fund a world wide Charity for the celibate.
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wait I only need £2 more for a car lol
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Depends on how far back you want to go. Remember, - I'm 90 now, so say I started around 12 - 13, (can't say for sure) and masturbated just about every day, - well you do the math. And don't forget the leap years!
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I'd buy land somewhere in Germany to build Victorian style home and collect so much latex wear and taxidermy.
Snake Charmera
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A plane ticket then I would be able to make those fantasies come true and wouldn't have to anymore

My Anti-Valentine Entry 💔

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/cheating/a-valentines-date-to-remember

My first EP and a top ten from the Pride Competition
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/lesbian/-love-is-love-.aspx

Hanging in the background but around

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Quote by tilly
A plane ticket then I would be able to make those fantasies come true and wouldn't have to anymore
This...
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing

In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.


Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
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A couple of items at the Dollar Store....
Ungovernable
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A Nikon with a sweet collection of long lenses.
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I would still be poor... but if someone starts to pay, that will change smile.... Can we make it €5? - I want that Ferrari before I reach the age of 30 :).
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Quote by AlDesc
I would still be poor... but if someone starts to pay, that will change smile.... Can we make it €5? - I want that Ferrari before I reach the age of 30 :).



Just to add - a used 348 doesn't count as a Ferrari.