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Second Chance

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Throughout our lives, we have all had something not go as we had hoped or anticipated.

So, what would you love to have a second chance at? What would be the "re-do" and would life be better, or would you just feel better?

Was it school?
Was it love?
Was it taking that trip?
Was it deciding on a different route?
Was it ........

Please share ....
College in particular. I spent way too much time studying and did not have enough fun and I dated guys just because they were very good looking and tall. If I did it over I'd take time to have more fun and date an entirely different kind of guy, the cute funny ones instead of those stuck-on-their-self narcissistic jerks.
This is a hard question to answer. Every choice we make becomes a learning experience good or bad. It's outcome is what we learn from. I'm not sure I would change anything really. Life is a lesson learned in blood sweat and tears but also love kindness and understanding.
But thank you for posting this. It will be interesting to see people's responses
Bunker Love
My Dream my latest stopry
Quote by MissyLuvsYa
College in particular. I spent way too much time studying and did not have enough fun and I dated guys just because they were very good looking and tall. If I did it over I'd take time to have more fun and date an entirely different kind of guy, the cute funny ones instead of those stuck-on-their-self narcissistic jerks.


If I had a "do-over",... ESPECIALLY in college... it WOULD BE to spend MORE time in studying and LESS time out having fun. I can surmise from MISSY's profile that she DID get a degree. Not sure if in her chosen field or not. Unfortunately, fate played her heavy hand with me and left me "behind the curve" on so many of life's opportunities.

MISSY: Thank you for your honesty in your comment. "Balance" is the secret!!

Rick...an OLD guy who sees from a slightly different perspective.
Quote by Noraj69
This is a hard question to answer. Every choice we make becomes a learning experience good or bad. It's outcome is what we learn from. I'm not sure I would change anything really. Life is a lesson learned in blood sweat and tears but also love kindness and understanding.
But thank you for posting this. It will be interesting to see people's responses



NORA: Your comment...in total...says an awful lot. There is strong wisdom there.

Rick...old enough to be your father & ALMOST old enough to be MISSY's GF.
I would change the way my life spun out 5 years ago. Though it was not my fault, I felt I could have avoided the
particular person in some way. If I had, I would have never had to leave town on short notice. I would never have gone
through depression causing my grades to fail, I would have never messed up so much.

On the bright side, I slowly picked back up. Maybe I'm at a better place where I'm at or maybe I would have been better,
I'll just never know. I did learn a lot of things along my rocky path and I think it's for the better honestly.
The answer is more depressing than where I am right now.
Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.

***
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PersonalAssistant posts so many thought provoking things and like usual I want to participate but am afraid to. When I am 'in that moment' I want to re-do many things, but after that moment has passed I usually can see that something good did come out of it for me.

Ok, it's my marriage. Go ahead and beat me up about it because I know myself that I shouldn't feel like I do, but damnit why why why??
We exchanged vows, did they ever mean anything to you?

I'm so sorry, I shouldn't do this here.
To the thread; I guess I wouldn't change anything because I don't. It isn't all bad; it isn't all good; it's just life. We learn and live and go on. It makes us who we are.

I read some where someone said: "Actually in life you get what you deserve." I would just like to say to that person, GO FUCK YOURSELF!!

Oh my, I should move this to the rage cage thread. I don't even have the motivation to do that.

Ok, what would I re-do: ME!!
If you ignore beauty, you will soon find yourself without it.................Frank Lloyd Wright

I always practice obedience, when it's in my best interest.
it would be my freshman year of college. not for studies,, but for that one person that i was an absolute fiend to. id give anything to undo/redo it.
You have to know the past to understand the present.

~ Dr. Carl Sagan


This is where my question originated from.

There are times in everyone's life where they are reflective, wondering that damn question "what if". Something happens, and you wonder .... if I had done ____ different, it might have worked. Sometimes, we also call them regrets.

Of course, this question is asked with 20/20 hind-vision.

But, that is where we learn from our mistakes, but looking back, and hopefully doing it better the next time, if the next time occurs.

* * * *

I have one BIG regret (and a few more whistful regrets). My biggest regret has been No.2 husband, and I would gladly give up 10 years of my life, to return to just before that time, and chose the other route of enjoying my children and being happily single.
There are times I would love to go back and kick my ex out the morning I buried my dad's ashes. It was an emotional day for me and I needed him to be there for me and instead, I ended up comforting him! He was upset because in the September, it was July, I'd be going back to uni to start second year, which would mean that I'd be 145 miles away from him. I stayed with him for another four years.

I understand that we learn as we live and if I changed my past I wouldn't be the person I am today, and I like me. At the same time, I wonder if I could have ended the relationship much sooner than I did and still learned the same lessons from it. Perhaps I needed to hit rock bottom to truly see how bad things were and to recognise how unhealthy and toxic the relationship had become. Besides, if I had ended it sooner, I wouldn't have grown so close to an old friend and we wouldn't be planning to travel around Australia next year.

No, I wouldn't change anything. There have been a lot of ups and downs, there have been some truly awful times I never want to relive but they've all led me here, and I'm excited to see what happens next.
Hmmm.. for me the biggest regret has been not having enough fun during my teens.. I am a short guy... and I only had my first sex when i was 19... too bad .. I have no idea why many girls are so hung up on height instead of the whole package ... I donot think I'll ever solve that puzzle..
but any way... so coming back to the question - if I could, I would like to relive those years and hopefully get more sex!
The one thing that I desperately wish I could change is something that I cannot face posting here. It's a sad part of my life that probably wouldn't have happened if I'd made one choice differently.



Thank you for this thought provoking question. Though it may be painful, it's good to think about this kind of thing now and then.
Quote by pb69
Thank you for this thought provoking question. Though it may be painful, it's good to think about this kind of thing now and then.


For me, it's important to know where I've been; accepting my dumbass mistakes, and to be able to look forward to life without the burdens of past mistakes. I hope in my lifetime, I have only that one regret.

It's kind of like the 4 steps to acceptance - disbelief, sadness, anger then acceptance.

They may always be revolving around in your head/heart .... but the acknowledgement of identifying things you could have done differently, helps the future.

May your regrets be few and your mistakes learning lessons.
I know i have thought about this a lot...and i always say that there was something to gain and learn from it....which is true.

But....if i could do ANYTHING i would go back so i could spend one more day with my grandpa before he died.
Like anyone else, I made mistakes. But one thing I know, we all have, and none of us is in Paradise. Why regret? Life is always waiting for us, with new
opportunities. Take them!
Maybe because shes been on my mind, and mainly because yesterday was the two year mark of my grandmothers death. but id like to go back and to have spent even more time with her then i did, even though i prolly did every day. I would have like to have gotten to say goodbye and her hear me. In life we take so many things for granted. People who we think will always be there. I sure didnt think I would lose her when I was 22 years old.

That would be what i would a second chance at.
They say hindsight's 20/20. If I could have a do over... I'd go back and kick my teenage ass and tell myself to stay in school.
It's all well and dandy to "live in the moment" but when you don't keep one eye turned to the future, you won't have a future.
Now, I hold many regrets and not about wasting my time on other people, I wouldn't have met them if I had of buckled down and worked hard in school. It's what I did to myself that was the most damaging. My family and friends and teachers said I had potential. Instead, I just wasted my life. Now I have to work twice as hard, for half the reward.
That's the difference between existing and living. I made bad choices when I was younger and "lived". Now that I'm older, I just "exist" instead of enjoying life.
You reap what you sow... Sad, but true.
Probably never gotten married to my first wife. Living with someone with depression is a drag.
An easy Question for me, my first and only marriage was a hideous waste of time. I hate that man so much!!!!!!!!!
Finally writing a bit about it on another site. It a little cathartic. But will never make up for ten lost years.
kisses, amy
I guess i could say my marriage and that i should never have gotten married but then i wouldnt have my kids and they are the most important things in my life so that isnt it.

Probably If I could have a second chance at when I sold my business. I had 2 partners and could not afford to buy them out so I sold and stayed on with the company that bought us. But I have not really been happy so I would have liked have tried to find a way to get someone to invest in it or so I could have kept it. It would have been hard I know, but I never really tried so I wish I would have.