I have been on this wonderful website for almost 2 years. I have noticed a high amount of turnover with the members of this site. I wonder why so many people come and go? Are they here for the real purpose of lush, to read and write erotica, or are they here cause they think this is a quick cure to the bulge in there pants, and when they don't get the relief, they leave?
Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
Lush, and turnover rate.
last reply
21 replies
3.0k views
0 watchers
0 likes
Active Ink Slinger
I think the reason may be:
Life is fast here, speeded up a thousand-fold. Relationships blossom and die in days. Others get involved, take sides; people are shunned, leave in a huff. New lovers come and go as virtual relationships can soon lose their fire. People quickly get bored, need new stimuli. It's the way of the modern world: why work at what you've got when something new is around the corner? Especially something titillating and off-limits. It's immature, childish, and promotes a shallow, superficial existence that perfectly suits the free market economy. Sex, consumerism and the internet were simply made for each other.
And then, of course, real-life partners suspect the worst, check histories, confront and threaten. We never evolved for this. It happened too fast. The choices are too great; the temptations too vast; and the flesh is very, very weak...
Life is fast here, speeded up a thousand-fold. Relationships blossom and die in days. Others get involved, take sides; people are shunned, leave in a huff. New lovers come and go as virtual relationships can soon lose their fire. People quickly get bored, need new stimuli. It's the way of the modern world: why work at what you've got when something new is around the corner? Especially something titillating and off-limits. It's immature, childish, and promotes a shallow, superficial existence that perfectly suits the free market economy. Sex, consumerism and the internet were simply made for each other.
And then, of course, real-life partners suspect the worst, check histories, confront and threaten. We never evolved for this. It happened too fast. The choices are too great; the temptations too vast; and the flesh is very, very weak...
"If I sign off with pithy quotations, ignore all preceding opinion for I am undoubtedly a fool. And if, after our discourse, I abuse you by proffering my vulgar produce, cast me into the gutter."
I agree with your statement, it makes sense. I mean, yeah it's real easy to get involved with someone on here. But, why do people not realize at some point, this is the internet, not real life. I know it is easy to dream and get distracted, but they don't have the wear with all, to realize it is nothing more than fantasy here?
Internet Philosopher
Quote by Marshall_Lewis
I agree with your statement, it makes sense. I mean, yeah it's real easy to get involved with someone on here. But, why do people not realize at some point, this is the internet, not real life. I know it is easy to dream and get distracted, but they don't have the wear with all, to realize it is nothing more than fantasy here?
You would be surprised at how real it can get to some. I've been here almost five years now and have seen people disappear as quickly as they come. Their reasons are theirs alone, but being on a sexually related site can often cause problems at home or work, so we should probably not be surprised.
I get on everyday from work, but I am not staying on it to the point of me getting in trouble, I was lucky enough to have a woman who loves reading the stories with me, which I am very thankful for. I guess, I just don't understand having something that is not in front of me. Its not from lack of imagination, its more of how can you develop feelings for someone you have never meet, and probably never will. But hey, what ever floats there boats.
Big-haired Bitch/Personality Hire
Lush is a community. But unlike the communities we actually live in, when things go sour, we can disappear. Even come back as someone else if we so choose. All done at the click of a button. Real bonds are formed here. These bonds may mean more to one than they do to another. One may leave because the closeness feels too restricting. Another may leave because of this rejection.
Others come for cheap thrills, and they find them. And then they get bored and move along.
Some go because of embarrassment, humiliation, petty drama, etc. Or maybe it gets too 'real' so they leave as a preventative measure. And then there are those who are in it for the long haul.
There are so many different kinds of people and interactions and relationships here. And if it's not to anyone's liking, or if one bites off more than they can chew, they simply move on.
The thing about the internet is that you can create your own experience. Your own reality, even. And if that falls apart, you can either move on or recreate. The former's a lot easier.
Others come for cheap thrills, and they find them. And then they get bored and move along.
Some go because of embarrassment, humiliation, petty drama, etc. Or maybe it gets too 'real' so they leave as a preventative measure. And then there are those who are in it for the long haul.
There are so many different kinds of people and interactions and relationships here. And if it's not to anyone's liking, or if one bites off more than they can chew, they simply move on.
The thing about the internet is that you can create your own experience. Your own reality, even. And if that falls apart, you can either move on or recreate. The former's a lot easier.
░P░U░S░S░Y░ ░I░N░ ░B░I░O░
Rookie Scribe
There are many reason why a person comes and goes off of any site when it on here or else where. It could be that the topics that are being discuss with people, to someone not telling the ones in their real life and keeping it from them, or the stories that one wants to be write until they find out there is a process of rules to go by, or someone reading the stories getting board. The turn over rate might seem to be high vs. the people that actual staying is more. I would like to see those numbers play against each other just to know which weights more.
Advanced Wordsmith
I also think that a lot of people try to be something they are not. Over time it is very hard to maintain a lie, or to be kinder, a fictional persona.
"Things that are acceptable to the masses are generally mediocre" Dita Von Teese
To Read my Famous story "Amys first time" click here
Click here for "Amy's Awakening"
Follow this link for part 3, "Amys Arousal"
To Read my Famous story "Amys first time" click here
Click here for "Amy's Awakening"
Follow this link for part 3, "Amys Arousal"
Active Ink Slinger
It's been common to me to find that people 'get caught' and disappear.
Active Ink Slinger
And then, of course, real-life partners suspect the worst, check histories, confront and threaten. ... (quote) Definitely. When I had all my stories available, someone accused me of writing about her husband. That was the first for me, very awkward.
Active Ink Slinger
How real it can get!
I have looked for just the right girl all my grown life. Recently, I met that girl and of all places on Lush. We knew we were right for each other. Both being married our relationship became an issue in her marriage. When she told me she had to take care of her husband I was devastated. I knew she was right, but I did not expect to be completely in her past.
Leaving Lush certainly crossed my mind because every time I open the site I will think of her for the rest of my life.
I have looked for just the right girl all my grown life. Recently, I met that girl and of all places on Lush. We knew we were right for each other. Both being married our relationship became an issue in her marriage. When she told me she had to take care of her husband I was devastated. I knew she was right, but I did not expect to be completely in her past.
Leaving Lush certainly crossed my mind because every time I open the site I will think of her for the rest of my life.
Wow... Hmmm~good points, and in an earlier post above [by Alexandra_A.]- yet I feel like that does not speak to what I know, or as much, maybe just simplified. Every person is a little different. There are probably a number of additional reasons, too, (like others have said) and those that seem most obvious or consistent. {I also agree, for the most part, with what Milik_Redman posted above].
Two friends have left in two and a half months on Lush. I had only 3 friends at the time on my friends list (-one my lover/boyfriend who is still here). One left because he felt that as a writer he was being too confined-perhaps he felt disillusioned with Lush in general and wanted to move on, as people do sometimes, seeking out what works for them, or what they need to do. I believe, from what he said, he also did not like that certain subjects and content is not allowed (when he writes in his real life). He told me as much. He had other personal matters going on as well. I cannot surmise all his reasons or of my next friend, but again, going by what was said to me, he found Lush to be a big distraction and something he liked but needed to spend less time doing -so he thought it was best to remove that source of temptation all together.
I am sure cheating or "playing" spouses get caught sometimes, the conducive atmosphere here may become no longer so conducive, or for someone in a relationship here. Real life catches up to us. 'But for me, I usually try a site out after quite some time deliberating and if it doesn't completely hold my interest and continue to in the first few months (1-3) then I am gone. I have a long attention span, but I do get bored easily. I have an addictive personality but things need to substantiate a reason to remain. I think that boils down to what my reasons for joining are, or such to begin with. (This may be true for the other people here as well as far as for reasons of joining Lush, as well as tendancies, as well as life-things, real or otherwise that all play a part in whatever turn over rate and reasons.) I also have a 2 year-'thing' for other stuff, and sometimes I hang in longer, but rarely with a website for some reason. Maybe I am not a long termer "easily" (?) and I am select in what I do.
So, in speaking for me, and the only two other examples I know, whether people see this as a hook-up site or place for sex chat, rp, or cyber, I was not ever on here for that, but for the stories and to share that with the boyfriend I already have, so I am not single coming here OR "looking" to begin with, as possible factors.
On other sites I saw people hold on to completely fictional personnas for years and years (NEVER themselves) and be emersed in lies, fantasy, a whole web of deceit, and steeped in trouble with many multiple lovers all being lied to... I saw nicer and more pleasant people go while the workers of their own private chaos sometimes remained, lol, soooo~ perhaps it is the skill and tenacity, or the ability to fly under radar and to put out fires? Or who is the best liar or does not give a hoot the MOST. WHO KNOWS. Drama can be a turn off, relationship stuff can happen as well as personalities get bent out of shape or put off, people can get banned, people can get bored, people can think it is not worth their time any longer, or have found something new, or put off something that a website can be a crutch or distraction temporarily for, and people can just be 'fickle.' I think turn-over is to be expected to a degree, given the scenarios.
Really.
I kinda think it is just math. (Then again I suck at Math) ~ so just my opinion and thoughts of possibilities. I know the meaning of life and my purpose here, and I know about love, but then again there are just somethings I do not fully comprehend!! XD
Two friends have left in two and a half months on Lush. I had only 3 friends at the time on my friends list (-one my lover/boyfriend who is still here). One left because he felt that as a writer he was being too confined-perhaps he felt disillusioned with Lush in general and wanted to move on, as people do sometimes, seeking out what works for them, or what they need to do. I believe, from what he said, he also did not like that certain subjects and content is not allowed (when he writes in his real life). He told me as much. He had other personal matters going on as well. I cannot surmise all his reasons or of my next friend, but again, going by what was said to me, he found Lush to be a big distraction and something he liked but needed to spend less time doing -so he thought it was best to remove that source of temptation all together.
I am sure cheating or "playing" spouses get caught sometimes, the conducive atmosphere here may become no longer so conducive, or for someone in a relationship here. Real life catches up to us. 'But for me, I usually try a site out after quite some time deliberating and if it doesn't completely hold my interest and continue to in the first few months (1-3) then I am gone. I have a long attention span, but I do get bored easily. I have an addictive personality but things need to substantiate a reason to remain. I think that boils down to what my reasons for joining are, or such to begin with. (This may be true for the other people here as well as far as for reasons of joining Lush, as well as tendancies, as well as life-things, real or otherwise that all play a part in whatever turn over rate and reasons.) I also have a 2 year-'thing' for other stuff, and sometimes I hang in longer, but rarely with a website for some reason. Maybe I am not a long termer "easily" (?) and I am select in what I do.
So, in speaking for me, and the only two other examples I know, whether people see this as a hook-up site or place for sex chat, rp, or cyber, I was not ever on here for that, but for the stories and to share that with the boyfriend I already have, so I am not single coming here OR "looking" to begin with, as possible factors.
On other sites I saw people hold on to completely fictional personnas for years and years (NEVER themselves) and be emersed in lies, fantasy, a whole web of deceit, and steeped in trouble with many multiple lovers all being lied to... I saw nicer and more pleasant people go while the workers of their own private chaos sometimes remained, lol, soooo~ perhaps it is the skill and tenacity, or the ability to fly under radar and to put out fires? Or who is the best liar or does not give a hoot the MOST. WHO KNOWS. Drama can be a turn off, relationship stuff can happen as well as personalities get bent out of shape or put off, people can get banned, people can get bored, people can think it is not worth their time any longer, or have found something new, or put off something that a website can be a crutch or distraction temporarily for, and people can just be 'fickle.' I think turn-over is to be expected to a degree, given the scenarios.
Really.
I kinda think it is just math. (Then again I suck at Math) ~ so just my opinion and thoughts of possibilities. I know the meaning of life and my purpose here, and I know about love, but then again there are just somethings I do not fully comprehend!! XD
Rainbow Warrior
I have only been here a short time, but I've been an admin on another site for 5 years and a high turnover rate seems pretty common online. People join and look for whatever it is they're looking for, and then give up and leave when they don't find it. There's always a core membership who work at making a site succeed, and the gadflies who flit around looking for diversion from one site to another. This site seems to have a fairly devoted core membership and maybe that's due to the central theme here which is story-telling. Some are the storytellers and some are the audience, but they are all here for the stories. The ones who come and go are looking for other things: romance, attention, or even drama, but those things are ancillary to the mission of the site, so those people appear and disappear frequently. I've yet to figure out the social dynamic on this site, so this is just my neophytic first assessment. I may be full of shit! lol
Rookie Scribe
The real life vs online fantasy life what a dangerous two edge sword it is. We might need to start up a new topic (if it is not made as of yet) How to open up in real life about this site if doing it in secret. Sometime people will do things that will cause drama such as asking for or giving personal e-mail address once a connection has been establish to doing video sex chats when their panther is away. We all have to remember sometimes you have to comfort what is making you unhappy or missing in your relationship to make it better...that is if you want to make it better. If not do stuff that will cause headaches and problems just in the end everyone will lose.
Active Ink Slinger
Not active enough to be informed.
Quote by Alexandra_A
I think the reason may be:
Life is fast here, speeded up a thousand-fold. Relationships blossom and die in days. Others get involved, take sides; people are shunned, leave in a huff. New lovers come and go as virtual relationships can soon lose their fire. People quickly get bored, need new stimuli. It's the way of the modern world: why work at what you've got when something new is around the corner? Especially something titillating and off-limits. It's immature, childish, and promotes a shallow, superficial existence that perfectly suits the free market economy. Sex, consumerism and the internet were simply made for each other.
And then, of course, real-life partners suspect the worst, check histories, confront and threaten. We never evolved for this. It happened too fast. The choices are too great; the temptations too vast; and the flesh is very, very weak...
I agree. Well put.
In life (not always) one gets what they ask for...for some its a challenge to make it past thirty days or six months. It humors me that many call it fantasy, thus describing themselves as a dragon, wolf or three-legged stool. Its sort of hypocrites the messenger...now who is the fool? If one doesn't know what they are dealing with, then that one becomes next day's feast. There is 180 degree twist between writer and conniver. Sincerity is a good thing when not abused. Lush is a wonderful chapter for people who use the tools and not play the meek. Turnover in most ways of life is due to stress, boredom or caught with foot in mouth. I have met some good people in Lush and value their help. All one has to do is open their eyes and use common sense. 
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Chanel
I agree. Well put.
I also agree. This is really well put.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Alexandra_A
I think the reason may be:
Life is fast here, speeded up a thousand-fold. Relationships blossom and die in days. Others get involved, take sides; people are shunned, leave in a huff. New lovers come and go as virtual relationships can soon lose their fire. People quickly get bored, need new stimuli. It's the way of the modern world: why work at what you've got when something new is around the corner? Especially something titillating and off-limits. It's immature, childish, and promotes a shallow, superficial existence that perfectly suits the free market economy. Sex, consumerism and the internet were simply made for each other.
And then, of course, real-life partners suspect the worst, check histories, confront and threaten. We never evolved for this. It happened too fast. The choices are too great; the temptations too vast; and the flesh is very, very weak...
This is extremely well put.
Active Ink Slinger
Lushstories is like a bookstore where everyone is welcomed and no one is asked to stay, but the bookstore serves everyone... the authors are like sales persons here and different type of moderators forms a voluntary workforce intended to help the visitors in respective particular areas... so what are you talking about ? 
I like the way you make me feel even when I'm nowhere near...
The Bee's Knees
it's really easy to leave when shit gets a little too deep online. lush allows people to be reckless in a variety of ways - whether it be romantic or malicious. there are times when i absolutely detest this (example, when someone comes back with a shiny new profile only to wreck havoc).
however, the revolving door also offers the opportunity for people to regain their bearing and return better equipped to handle a virtual world. for better or worse, i hope it never changes. second chances are always welcome and experience is worth its weight in gold.
however, the revolving door also offers the opportunity for people to regain their bearing and return better equipped to handle a virtual world. for better or worse, i hope it never changes. second chances are always welcome and experience is worth its weight in gold.
Say. Her. Name.