Announcing our Whodunnit competition

Picture the scene.

City cops secure the murder scene as cameras flash and fingerprint dust drifts in the summer heat...

A car screeches to a halt in front of a bank as two people rush out, faces masked, guns waving...

Gasps echo around the gallery, the gathered art lovers in disbelief as the unveiling reveals the centrepiece painting has been stolen.

Who doesn’t love a good crime thriller? The mystery and intrigue. The suspects. The alibis. The thrill of danger often goes hand in hand with sex, as adrenaline spikes.

We want to read stories which start with some sort of crime, or the immediate aftermath of a crime and go on to reveal over the course of the story, just who did it. Who done it. Fine, whodunnit (and that will be the one and only time Lush will encourage the use of bad grammar).

To give you room for plot, plus a whole lot of sexy action, the word limit on this one is 10,000, however stories can be in any category, other than micro or poetry.

Crimes of passion are of course allowed, however usual Lush rules apply. No snuff stories, no death during sex, no non-consent, and violence shouldn’t be too extreme.

We'll keep this one running until mid November to give folks time to get stuck in.

Closing date: 17th Nov 2024

Announcement date: 30th November 2024

1st place $150

2nd place $100

3rd place $50

All prizes will be paid via PayPal, or an equivalent amount of lush coins can be given

Full details here

I love the idea of the theme behind this competition: Miss Scarlet kills Colonel Mustard in the library with the dagger. Being a natural at bad grammar, it is right up my street! 😊

Crime, eh? Hmmm…

How about a crime so good that …

Well, never mind. I'll keep that thought to myself…for now.

Love it! This may surpass the Noir comp as my fav comp entries to read thus far on Lush!

Bring it, smut writers! 😎

Quote by Jen

This will be the one and only time Lush will encourage the use of bad grammar.

Hi Jen,

While the rest is clear to me, I do think this sentence needs more clarification. Are you saying, you want authors to deliberately write bad grammar, like not using capital letters, deliberately poor sentence structures... etc etc and does it go as far as poor spelling?

Or are you saying the moderators will let poor grammar go? Things like commas, colons, and my favourite, ellipses. To encourage new woodbee whodunnit authors to enter?

Quote by wxt55uk

Hi Jen,

While the rest is clear to me, I do think this sentence needs more clarification. Are you saying, you want authors to deliberately write bad grammar, like not using capital letters, deliberately poor sentence structures... etc etc and does it go as far as poor spelling?

Or are you saying the moderators will let poor grammar go? Things like commas, colons, and my favourite, ellipses. To encourage new woodbee whodunnit authors to enter?

what she means is, you're allowed to use the phrase "whodunnit"... it was said jokingly... other than that, the usual rules apply... please make sure you're story is up to snuff (see what I did there) as far as grammar and spelling go 'cause yes, as usual, the mods WILL smack you about the head and send your story back if it's littered with issues. hope that clarifies things...?

i have a title. i like the title. i am usually not good with titles. i don't have a story though. and honestly, I really haven't been all that great at getting it together for comps in the past few years, so we'll see...

Quote by sprite

i have a title. i like the title. i am usually not good with titles. i don't have a story though. and honestly, I really haven't been all that great at getting it together for comps in the past few years, so we'll see...

I still remember your Anti-Valentine competition-winning entry, Rachel. It was one of the cleverest stories I have ever read here.

Wow, interesting theme! Brainstorming mode on!

Oh, now THAT is my kind of story. And with 10k words I don't need to worry about a limit. This one may be my favorite subject of all so far.

I'll definitely be submitting a story in this one. My mind is already churning with possibilities

Quote by Milik_the_Red

Oh, now THAT is my kind of story. And with 10k words I don't need to worry about a limit. This one may be my favorite subject of all so far.

I'll definitely be submitting a story in this one. My mind is already churning with possibilities

Whereas my mind is merely churning…

Oh well.

Quote by wxt55uk

Hi Jen,

While the rest is clear to me, I do think this sentence needs more clarification. Are you saying, you want authors to deliberately write bad grammar, like not using capital letters, deliberately poor sentence structures... etc etc and does it go as far as poor spelling?

Or are you saying the moderators will let poor grammar go? Things like commas, colons, and my favourite, ellipses. To encourage new woodbee whodunnit authors to enter?

This is an excellent point. And should it be limited to dialog? That usually is a place grammar can drift. But in the narration? That's an interesting concept.

And do we get points of if we don't?

You will all get negative points and spankings if your grammar and punctuation aren't perfect. PERFECT!

glares

Quote by Jen
and spankings

Not helping, Boss!

Quote by sprite

what she means is, you're allowed to use the phrase "whodunnit"... it was said jokingly... other than that, the usual rules apply... please make sure you're story is up to snuff (see what I did there) as far as grammar and spelling go 'cause yes, as usual, the mods WILL smack you about the head and send your story back if it's littered with issues. hope that clarifies things...?

I am so very unhappy with this. For a while there I thought this could be a competition I could enter. You have absolutely ruined that! I even had a title in mind... 'Someone stole SJ's steak and chips'... it would have been podium for sure.

Quote by Jen

You will all get negative points and spankings if your grammar and punctuation aren't perfect. PERFECT!

glares

Well, can I get a spanking anyway?

I had actually been recently wondering when the new competition would be. Hmm, this will be a challenge. But I already have an interesting premise if I can flesh (heh heh) it out.

I love crime stories and having never written one I’m really hoping I can think of something for this competition. A great theme, thanks everybody involved!

Ten thousand words ! Grammarly is going to get a thrashing. 🤓

Now, if I can just cum up with a story idea to go with the image…

'Course, the proportions are all wrong with this one.

And yes, I'm talking about the aspect, not the ass!

I love it, Bear! 😊 I wonder who will be first in to set the bar.

Quote by Piquet

Ten thousand words ! Grammarly is going to get a thrashing.

Haha. You don't have to use them all. It's a maximum 😁

Oh no, my friend, I'm aiming for 9999.

Quote by Piquet

Oh no, my friend, I'm aiming for 9999.

I've alerted all the mods to reject yours if this target isn't met 🤭

Quote by Jen

I've alerted all the mods to reject yours if this target isn't met 🤭

...hold my beer Tolstoy !

Quote by Piquet

Oh no, my friend, I'm aiming for 9999.

This is basically me. I've already started working and I've been trying to keep an eye on my word count. It should come in under 10k at the rate I'm going, but one never knows 🤣

Oh, the possibilities, and yet, in France... our most famous detective writer is Emile Gaboriau... who? Gaboriau... exactly. All the other famous French detectives were written by others.

So, I shall think on this one; it must be unconventional. I do have an idea, but as always, it needs a twist.

To everyone else, my best wishes, and I wish you all complete success. 😘

Quote by Piquet

...hold my beer Tolstoy !

I'm not Tolstoy, but I've read your stuff, Pete. I'll hold your beer if that's OK.

Quote by AmuseBouche

Oh, the possibilities, and yet, in France... our most famous detective writer is Emile Gaboriau... who? Gaboriau... exactly. All the other famous French detectives were written by others.

So, I shall think on this one; it must be unconventional. I do have an idea, but as always, it needs a twist.

To everyone else, my best wishes, and I wish you all complete success. 😘

And I will await your entry, Madam, with the greatest anticipation!

This is a great theme and I'm looking forward to seeing what everyone conjures up for us to read.

No ideas of my own have jumped out at me yet. Maybe a half-concept last night, but it's going to need some thought before I commit to it or do something else.

pops brain in jar to stew a while