Quote by TonyZ
Being a gay bottom I guess you can say I am some what of an expert on this subject. Please do not try doggy style as someone suggested because this is definitely not a beginner's position. That position allows for a deeper penetration and gives control to the man behind you which may not be in tune with what you are feeling in terms of pain. The two of you facing each other can also be challenging because you would have to adopt an uncomfortable and unnatural position, especially for the first time (you do have to remember that our anal passages are way back in our bodies, so we have to lift our legs and lower torso even higher in order to allow for the penetration to happen and if the anal passage is not straight, the intruding member will bend opening the hole even more causing lots of more pain, the beginner will feel it 100 fold) and again, the man has complete control, even more so than doggie style. At least in a doggie style position, you may go forward and escape the pressure that he is applying. The same thing would apply to you being on your belly. You would surrender all of the control to your man which may not be so good for the beginner.
For the first time, a good position is for both of you to be spooning (on the side) because even though the control is still on his hands, you may still escape if the pressure is applied to fast, plus he may hug you while you both kiss. In this position you will feel lots of reassuring and loving body contact so you may concentrate on relaxing your anal muscle. You may also flex your knees a little while bringing them (together) towards your head (but not too high up on your body either, just about 90 degrees off of your torso), your legs should move parallel to the bed, not towards the ceiling. This knees and legs position is very important because it will naturally part your ass cheeks giving him a better and easier access to your anal cavity. By the way, penetration in this position is not only a good and loving beginners position, but also provides a penetration that is not as deep as doggie style. My advice to a beginner though (the best position), is to try riding your man. The man has to be laying flat on his back as you lower yourself on his hard shaft. This gives you full and complete control... you will decide how fast and how deep you want to go and can wait as long as you like to accommodate to a new feeling and sensation. There are lots of people that have tried anal sex and didn't like it, and the reason is because they did not have the luxury of riding their first man.
But before you try out any of these positions you still have to think about using an fleet anal cleaning solution, and work on gently massaging and stretching your sphincter with a small finger at first and gradually insert more and more. In my experience, stretching before sex is more important to relax the sphincter of the beginner than the actual act of stretching your hole. The key to anal sex is to relax your sphincter and use lots and lots of lube. The best are water based like K-Y, Anal Ease or Astro Glide but these will last a lot less and will have to be reapplied a lot sooner than lubes that are oil based. Also, water based lubes are much easier to clean and wash than oil based lubes. The reason I would not use oil based or non-water based lubes is that they will heat up and cause a burning sensation, and if a condom is worn (which I highly recommend) may break it out of friction. I have done it without lube using spit instead and it works wonders for those improvised moments of intense heat between me and my man but would not recommend it for the beginner. Cum also works great and there are quite a few men that pre-cum rivers which will also work quite nicely (not for the beginner). I have had men ask me to suck on their cocks as sloppily as I could, drooling all over their shafts so that we may use my own spit as lube. By the way, without lube it may also be painful for your man although I imagine not as much. I am not sure of this because I am 100% bottom, but I have heard a few men complain.
Though I hate to say it, the guy knows what he's talking about. The person on top has total control, it also means you can manoeuvre the penis inside you with a rolling sensation rather than a painful stabbing one.
If the guy knows what he's doing you should be ok. If he's new to it make sure he knows not to thrust upwards even though he'll want to and explain that he's got to be patient, you'll be pausing to get used the feeling. It's better if he wears a condom as if you're an anal virgin and very tight it can hurt his cock.