Never really been in a position to ask this question since I was as certain as I could reasonably be that I was my wife's first lover. However, I really think the question should never be asked, surely the only important number is the last one, ie. you?
If you're going through hell, keep going. - Winston Churchill
Cincinnati Bow tie, just looked it up....nice!
I think the past should stay in the past if all is well in the relationship. My girlfriend insists that I know just about everything about her & this is information that she volunteered on her own. I didn't care about her past, but she sure is interested in mine It's not that I'm intentionally holding anything back but I grew up in the 60's & 70's & well, need I say more? What matters is what kind of person I am now...
I say who really cares. If you care about her it doesn't matter. If she cares about you it doesn't matter. I guess the don't ask don't tell thing mentioned earlier is probably good? I just don't think it should really be an issue.
There really is no answer for this, so I'm going to go back to reality now.
i think what bothers me most is if she said ''whats yours?''
I think I would hope the subject would die then. Or say something like, "What does it matter anyway Darling? No one is as important as you."
Notches on a belt, really doesn't matter. I could care less how many women he's been with as long as he know's I'm the best he'll ever have.
Nothing wrong with a little mystery.
I don't care much about his past relationships. If I ask the question and he answers honestly, I'll be glad he's honest. I won't judge him, it's the past. As long as he's faithful to me then I really don't care, it's none of my business. If he feels uncomfortable answering that question then he can say so and let it be a mystery (just as long as he doesn't get fed up when I don't answer, fair is fair). People shouldn't dwell on the past, just move ahead and try not to make the same mistakes.
Anything that happened before me is none of my business unless there's a story attached......
I've worked in the music business all my life and we're not known for being inexperienced or virginal.....
Everyone's got a past......
I'm in my late 40's now.......
(My experience and hers not withstanding, I STILL approach a new partner with a certain..... Well, 'shyness' isn't the right word, (particularly if it's a passionate encounter,) but there is a certain trepidation..... The first time you do it with a new person, (if it's not just a quick fuck) might as well be the first time you've ever done it......)
The numbers don't matter.....
Some years ago, a girlfriend who I knew well of old and who ended up living with me (and we were fond of each other) were lying in the afterglow of a rather steamy session and I happened to mention that the first time I'd had her had been really memorable for me..... A VERY experienced girl, I thought our first time was rather special......
"REALLY," she said..... "I thought it was really average and it was ages before I got into it......"
Looking at my ashen expression she giggled........
"It's FINE now," she murmured, and cuddled, and I think she did something nasty then to distract me.......
Couldn't care less about numbers.......
The first time I have you is the first time you have me....... What happens after that is the interesting bit...................
xx SF
(Just to make the point, when I was 36, (over 10 years ago) an Eighteen Year Old girlfriend of mine asked me if I could remember the names of every girl I'd ever slept with...... When I got to 185 names she asked me to stop......) True Story.
if you actually like the girl, don't ask her until you are both very committed. I asked my boyfriend after dating him for about a year, and he was my first, he told me hes done it with 10 other girls..made me feel less special, and hes a guy! imagine what the girl feels like when you ask her for her "number"!
