I had unintentionally but thoroughly, hijacked a legitimate thread, selfishly overiding another persons real question with my freakish issues. To those who took the time and effort to provide input, your effort is greatly appreciated. Id like to apologize to all who read the posts I made, as they made little sense, were out of orser and context and sounded more than massively ”whiny”.
Here is the synopsis if my issue, it will be extensive, so if it bores you, feel free to disregard and move on. Im 45 years old, retiring from the US Army after 23 years of service as an MP. My issue is that my life completely sucks. I have been married twice and divorced twice. First wife left because ”I was gone too much”, (this was before the war), she left me for a Co worker of hers ten years my senior and 50 pounds overweight. Second wife basically tricked me into marriage. How you ask, I have ptsd, from an incident before I joined, makes me very overprotective of women. She played on that so I ignored lies that popped up, manipulation, etc. Did I love either woman, the first, yes, the second, no. Now before marriage or in between, I meet ladies and fall hard for them. But I am always tossed aside for the cool guys, the better looking, charming suave types Id love to bury a ka bar in. since I started dating, age 14, there have been 33 if these ladies. Yes I remember all of them, they all did a very good job imprinting themselves on my memory. The latest, or last I keep wanting to say, was a much younger lass, in another unit. We knew each other from in processing, but I just looked out for her, single mom, pretty girl, bad men yada yada. A little over a year ago, I was on dating site and her picture came up as wanting to know about me. I contacted her as discreetly as possible, asking her about the site. She was on it, but that wasnt her profile. She easily figured out who I was, even said she preferred older men, and was attracted to me. Nothing physical happened, as she was having medical issues at the time that forbade sex...well with me anyway. One weekend she vanished off the radar and I freak. We had spoken the night prior and I thought I messed up, I do that a lot. I was also scared because of her condition. When she did answer two days later, she said she was with family, I didnt own her and I needed to calm down. Find out she was with one of the guys that worked for me! A little thug wannabe car guy, who KNEW I was talking to her, her pic was my background. I get told Im too needy and timing. So for the 33d time, I am nuked. I have no ego or self esteem left. I want to shred him, cant. He sees me as no threat, all the better for my ego. Oh why so many? I kept falling for that ”tgeres someone out there for you” line and Id go balls to the walls to show a girl I could make up for my looks with passion and intensity and romance. I tried to get this out in the other thread, but screwed it up and pissed a lot of nice people off. So any takers on the impossible loser express?
you know what i call insensitivity on you both..this thread is called RELATIONSHIP ADVICE!!!!!!..there is a thread called sexual issues..LUSH is not a bunch of wankers!!!have you seen the writing talent that is shown HERE?? that is like calling erotica just porn!! shame on you both shame for not seeing this man's pain and for degrading what is one of lush's loveliest things the ability to share both sex and ideas on forums and stories...
shame...lush IS more than a masturbatory aid...wow...so you cant talk about sex without fucking yourself??control much???
good god if this was my site i would jettsion you both for this..wow..wow.....
I apologise unreservedly if my post caused any offence to oldhound or blazestcyr.
The part of the post I was agreeing with was the comment about going to see a doctor. You have mentioned that you have suffered from ptsd and from the tone of your post I believe that you may benefit from further counselling
I did not intend to give the impression that I concur with the rest of the post I quoted
No issue at all, really. Appreciate the input
Ms Nicola, for me a well written story takes me out of me for a bit and lowers the stress level enough to relax and not choke the crap out of the next civilian dilweed that tells me Im not eligble for a job because I dont have a BA.
Thank you OldHound for feeling safe enough to bare your soul on this thread, and I hope that was liberating for you, and a start to getting the help and support you need to deal with some overwhelming issues in more than one area of life. The suggestion of medical support and counselling was sound and valuable, and may prove central to your needs. However as several people on this thread have pointed out, this is a community of adults, and therefore one might expect the sharing life experiences and problems, and a wideranging and supportive response to that. I look forward to hearing how you progress, and wish you all the best in your life changes; hopefully for the better in the months and years to come.
This post has strayed from the original point, but a very interesting read none the less. As for your relationship problems:
1. The army has probably screwed you up a lil (personal opinion, take no offence)
2. Chill my friend. Those who stress the most about losing g/f tend to be the 'needy' ones, even though you don't mean to be
3. Find a hobby. From my (observational) experience, those who go from girl to girl, never seem happy. (their aim in life is to be in a relationship. Trust me on this. I have a couple of good friends who always seems miserable, and never see their friends anymore because of an obsession with their g/f)
4. A hobby keeps your ming occupied on something other than finding that perfect partner.
5. When the right girl does come along, you will not smother her, as you your priority tends to be your hobby. (if she doesn't understand this, she is not worth getting involved with)
6. Space at the beginning of a relationship is important as it feeds fuel to the fire!
This is just my small bits of advice from what i have observed from friends relationships over the years. I hope it helps.
Only one response, The Army did not screw me up! The guve and take of my issue is apparently the ease of handling getting shot at or handling bodies in exchange for complete lack of understanding the evil ones lol. Any issue I have is me, not the service.
Ms lass, I tried to be civil with her, and with the psychobabblista, and you read what happened. I did not, nor do I speak to women as I ranted here. I was polite and civil and attempt at humour. Now,well now is a different issue. I get told I project being the victim, that nothing is my fault, once by the woman who is the cause of my recent whining, pity the victim rants, then again by a mental health professional who laughed in my face and had to get proof I had lived through what I did, then she couldnt even ”help” me. you have suffered greatly, and in this arena you are far stronger than me, because now I just want to visit on them agony like they have done to me. Pity Im not able to ”live well” or get a hotter girl to get revenge. And none are worth going to jail for, si Ill just be the mean old man they made me.
I'm stuck in your exact situation, and bro, I gotta say that I have no idea why the hell some women play with the few good guys left in the world. And to all the people out there who's guilty of doing that, here's a big Fuck You . To all the sick bastards who have multiple girls, cheat on their wives/girlfriends....... I sincerely hope that your cock falls off and your heart stops beating.
As for the person who started this thread, I know that feeling. I've given up too. It fucking sucks.
But you know what hurts even more than that? That little flame inside you that gives you the tiniest bit of hope. That little thought that maybe, just maybe someone out there is different.
You cant deny this.
I'm out.
No flame of hope, just a yearning for beer and pizza
You say that like beer and pizza is gonna fill the void.
It'll only make you fat.
You dont want to be fat, depressed and insane, do you? Cause, eventually this will go to your head (if it hasn't already)
