Ok. So my husband is interested in having multiple wives... right now it is just him and me and the kids. He's actually not all that sexually driven... he's never, with me or anyone else, been one who "needed" sex. I'm the nympho in the relationship. LOL.
Anyway, back on topic, he sees multiple wives as being able to provide for our family better... more wives to help each other with the kids (we have many), with the housework, with providing financially for the family, etc.
I have a lot of mixed feelings on this. What are your thoughts?
I ask that you keep your comments polite. Thank you.
1. Is it legal where you are?
2. If it's not something you want or are uncomfortable with in any way, then it's not gonna work. Period.
3. He says it's not gonna be about sex, but I assume he's gonna be sexing these women up, correct? How do you feel about that?
Quote by MamaNeeds2Cum Ok. So my husband is interested in having multiple wives... right now it is just him and me and the kids. He's actually not all that sexually driven... he's never, with me or anyone else, been one who "needed" sex. I'm the nympho in the relationship. LOL.
Anyway, back on topic, he sees multiple wives as being able to provide for our family better... more wives to help each other with the kids (we have many), with the housework, with providing financially for the family, etc.
I have a lot of mixed feelings on this. What are your thoughts?
I ask that you keep your comments polite. Thank you.
I don't really understand his reasons for wanting them, it doesn't make any sense at all. Surely you would be better with multiple husbands. That way you'd be satisfied sexually and your husband would have more time to relax. Just think the average income of men is higher and with the extra cash you could afford home help with housework and the kids giving you much needed rest for your nocturnal duties.
Also with wives there's the risk of even more kids. So suggest it to him and see what he thinks.
Beware some of the replies will be blunt here on Lush, we tend not to pull our punches.
He wants unpaid laborers at home, who would also work and give up their earnings to support the household? This is a pretty cockeyed scheme he has. I wouldn't waste my time considering this if i were you. Are you Mormons?
I don't really understand his reasons for wanting them, it doesn't make any sense at all. Surely you would be better with multiple husbands. That way you'd be satisfied sexually and your husband would have more time to relax. Just think the average income of men is higher and with the extra cash you could afford home help with housework and the kids giving you much needed rest for your nocturnal duties.
Also with wives there's the risk of even more kids. So suggest it to him and see what he thinks.
I agree with dpw .... mmmmf would work fabulously!! for a woman with a high sex drive, easily able to have sex daily (and maybe more than once a day!) and switch up who is on rotation and when! oh, my, win-win-win!!
The idea of your husband having to actually look after another family or more, under one roof, he'd better be bringing in over $250,000 a year or more .... I doubt most men would want to work that hard!
Let us know if you get a second or third man in the mix!! There's a great story there!!
I agree with dpw .... mmmmf would work fabulously!! for a woman with a high sex drive, easily able to have sex daily (and maybe more than once a day!) and switch up who is on rotation and when! oh, my, win-win-win!!
The idea of your husband having to actually look after another family or more, under one roof, he'd better be bringing in over $250,000 a year or more .... I doubt most men would want to work that hard!
Let us know if you get a second or third man in the mix!! There's a great story there!!
Didn't realize this mattered.. but apparently everyone assumes HE is the breadwinner. My husband is a SAHD. I am the sole breadwinner for our family of six.
Multiple marriages are illegal in the United States, Mormon or not. It's an offense called bigamy punishable by a prison sentence. The Mormon men that do it are still legally only married to one wife, the other wives are not recognized as being married by the state.
Quote by Buz Multiple marriages are illegal in the United States, Mormon or not. It's an offense called bigamy punishable by a prison sentence. The Mormon men that do it are still legally only married to one wife, the other wives are not recognized as being married by the state.
Yes. We know this. I would be his only legal wife. Again, not sure if this is something I want to do... but he's put it out there several times. So I'm naturally becoming curious
Didn't realize this mattered.. but apparently everyone assumes HE is the breadwinner. My husband is a SAHD. I am the sole breadwinner for our family of six.
I still say ... MMMMF .... get some enjoyment out of it!! Be the center of attention!
Didn't realize this mattered.. but apparently everyone assumes HE is the breadwinner. My husband is a SAHD. I am the sole breadwinner for our family of six.
Ah! This makes things clearer. I'm a sahm, and it can be lonely and isolating without a network of other grownups to socialize with. There are Moms Clubs all over the place, maybe he could join one of those? Surely they'd allow dads, as sahds are becoming way more common. Or he could use it as a way to trawl for potential wives?
Quote by MamaNeeds2Cum Ok. So my husband is interested in having multiple wives... right now it is just him and me and the kids. He's actually not all that sexually driven... he's never, with me or anyone else, been one who "needed" sex. I'm the nympho in the relationship. LOL.
Anyway, back on topic, he sees multiple wives as being able to provide for our family better... more wives to help each other with the kids (we have many), with the housework, with providing financially for the family, etc.
I have a lot of mixed feelings on this. What are your thoughts?
I ask that you keep your comments polite. Thank you.
Quote by MamaNeeds2Cum Didn't realize this mattered.. but apparently everyone assumes HE is the breadwinner. My husband is a SAHD. I am the sole breadwinner for our family of six.
Interestingly enough, I have an acquaintance who entered into a similar arrangement about a year ago. She's "wife" number 3. They all live in the same house on the south side of Chicago. Definitely NOT Mormons. All three of the wives earn a great income, and this man is the stay at home dad. While all these women work, they also share the housework, grocery shopping, homework, and seems to stagger their schedules, so they can manage the kids as well. This guy does manage to fuck them all pretty regularly. Other than that, I'm not sure what he does while he's staying at home.
Hey, if that's the lifestyle you want, go for it. My question for you is this: If the women are financially supporting the family, doing housework, child care, and he's NOT sexually satisfying you, what purpose does he serve? With the information you've provided, sounds like he's trying to make his life even cushier. Also, do you want to share what little sex you're already getting with other women? I, for one, think I'm worthy enough to have 100% of a man and not just a percentage so he can share with other women. Good luck with whatever you decide to do!
Happy to see that there are a few people who can put their own little world aside and give less narrow-minded replies.
I myself think this to be a scene hard to manage to everyone's satisfaction. The few and little detailed arguments you shared are all somewhat onesided(if that is even a word). What I mean to say is that ever since party in this scene has to benefit from it. Even though there are some advantages in it for all there are also major drawbacks and obstacles that stand in the way of this working out well for all.
You mostly pointed out that this is your husbands idea, that it's more for the convenience of having extra people around the house and that you're not sure about it. For a better discussion a better idea of your own thoughts would help. But I can understand how this is not the type of thing for a/this forum post.
All that's left to say is communicate and set some rules before you go ahead and actually try it.
Quote by DutchMike88 Happy to see that there are a few people who can put their own little world aside and give less narrow-minded replies.
My reply was colored by the very mercenary sounding reasons the husband said he wanted multiple wives for. I think most of us on Lush are pretty open-minded about people's lifestyle choices.
Interestingly enough, I have an acquaintance who entered into a similar arrangement about a year ago. She's "wife" number 3. They all live in the same house on the south side of Chicago. Definitely NOT Mormons. All three of the wives earn a great income, and this man is the stay at home dad. While all these women work, they also share the housework, grocery shopping, homework, and seems to stagger their schedules, so they can manage the kids as well. This guy does manage to fuck them all pretty regularly. Other than that, I'm not sure what he does while he's staying at home.
Hey, if that's the lifestyle you want, go for it. My question for you is this: If the women are financially supporting the family, doing housework, child care, and he's NOT sexually satisfying you, what purpose does he serve? With the information you've provided, sounds like he's trying to make his life even cushier. Also, do you want to share what little sex you're already getting with other women? I, for one, think I'm worthy enough to have 100% of a man and not just a percentage so he can share with other women. Good luck with whatever you decide to do!
That sounds like a crazy situation that your acquaintance is in, are there multiple mothers, if so is he the only father? Do the kids get along? It sounds like it would make a great story, why don't you write it? Let me know if you do I will definitely read it.
That sounds like a crazy situation that your acquaintance is in, are there multiple mothers, if so is he the only father? Do the kids get along? It sounds like it would make a great story, why don't you write it? Let me know if you do I will definitely read it.
Yes, all three women now have children by him, although "wives" number two and three do have children by their first husbands as well. They each had one child already. Nope, not writing about this.
Read the background, CG, to your last post and I can confirm that such arrangements exist and last
Three friends are in a similar partnership - going on 15 years now, two boys - one by each mother and born within a fortnight of each other. The boys are now early teens and are almost like twins, very fond of each other.
The mothers are best of friends and I've never seen/heard of any jealousy between them - and they both adore their co-husband
So yes, if the mindset is tuned to it, it can be a loving and lasting thing for all concerned
Hmmm...does he want someone at home to help him with the kids or someone else to bring in more wages? If he hasn't got a high sex drive, why does he want more sex? How about an au pair instead? Would need to establish firm guidelines I imagine.
" I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer"
Woody Allen
Has he, or you, considered the concept of multiple divorces? More accurately, considering there would only be one marriage, there is the risk of multiple legal entanglements if/when someone walks out the door. It would be prudent to have a unique "pre-nup" for all involved but finding a lawyer to competently handle the process would be a challenge.
Just sayin'
// To clarify, after reading responses to the above, I was alluding to the possibility of such an arrangement being viewed from a legal perspective as a common-law relationship(s). If your jurisdiction factors that into any decision affecting the financial outcome of a split tread carefully.
Legally, you can only have one spouse - even with the Mormons.
The trio I spoke of, legally, the man and one of the gals are married. The other gal is not married to them under the law, but they did go through a Pagan hand-fasting ceremony and to their friends the three are married to each other. However it is not legally recognized by the government, nor will it be unless the law is changed.
Unknown User
ok I so don't get this
you are a hot wife who has a GREAT sex drive
YOU make the money in the family
he is LUCKY enough to stay at home and provide a home for you
and yet He needs MORE wives
and yet he CANNNOT satisfy you??
having been a SAHM
you know what
he sounds amazingly lazy and he wants to have sex with others as well as not doing what MILLIONS of women have been doing on their own for decades!
I know I am being mean and blunt...DPW did warn you
but I am doing this for your own good honey
he wants to have less work at home
wants YOU to provide free sex and extra laborers for HIS enjoyment
and all you will get out of this
is EVEN less sex and more people to take care of
since as you said he is not interested in sex
say (as you all are not Mormons) I will go for an extra husband to help ME out
you get more sex he gets help
it is ALL good
but to me honey
I would kick this guy to the curb
he HAS it ALL in YOU!!
and frankly does not appreciate the fact that he CAN stay home
Don't get me wrong... there is plenty here that I agree with a lot of the time. I suppose because I've always been the breadwinner and basically the responsible one in relationships that I am accustomed to the situation? My first husband was an abusive and demeaning individual who spent more time telling me I was worthless and beating the crap out of me and trying to force me into sexual engagements with others than attempting to lift a finger around the house or with my oldest child. He didn't work, although he was 100% physically capable of doing so. I was working two full-time jobs, taking care of the house, and paying for the neighbor to babysit my oldest (who was then between 6 months and 2 years old) while my first husband drank himself into oblivious rages and spent all my hard-earned money on internet porn, alcohol, and gambling.
My second husband (whom my original post in this thread is about) has some health limitations (for example, he has severe pain from nerve damage and a couple of his vertebrate have begun to fuse together). It is physically very difficult for him to work. He doesn't drink or get physically abusive. I also have three children with him (yes, if you are counting, that brings the total number of kids to 4... currently at ages 2, 3, 4, and 9).
I honestly feel trapped at times. I love him. I bust my ass to take care of my family. I'm working insane hours at work (typically 70+ hours a week), which is an hour away from home (one-way). I'm determined to stay active in my kids' lives and with their schools, refusing to be one of those parents who have no idea how their own kids are doing in school and trying to make it to as many of their activities as I possibly can.
I've always been an empathetic individual... easily able to put myself in someone else's shoes and empathizing with their situation. I guess I can see things from my husband's perspective... it doesn't make it any easier tho. It does, however, cause me to consider his request in an effort to make him happy.
*sigh*
Maybe I'm just a glutton for punishment...
Don't get me wrong... I would love to be in a relationship that I was not forced (whether out of circumstances or otherwise) to be the sole breadwinner or individual responsible for EVERYTHING being taken care of. It would be nice to be the one being taken care of every once in a while.
But... why wish for something that is not going to happen?
Quote by thesexynun ok I so don't get this
you are a hot wife who has a GREAT sex drive
YOU make the money in the family
he is LUCKY enough to stay at home and provide a home for you
and yet He needs MORE wives
and yet he CANNNOT satisfy you??
having been a SAHM
you know what
he sounds amazingly lazy and he wants to have sex with others as well as not doing what MILLIONS of women have been doing on their own for decades!
I know I am being mean and blunt...DPW did warn you
but I am doing this for your own good honey
he wants to have less work at home
wants YOU to provide free sex and extra laborers for HIS enjoyment
and all you will get out of this
is EVEN less sex and more people to take care of
since as you said he is not interested in sex
say (as you all are not Mormons) I will go for an extra husband to help ME out
you get more sex he gets help
it is ALL good
but to me honey
I would kick this guy to the curb
he HAS it ALL in YOU!!
and frankly does not appreciate the fact that he CAN stay home
Have you thought ever of having another woman at home for YOU? If your husband isn't that keen on sex, you could have fun, shed some of the workload from you to her - your life sounds like not a lot of time for you - and he gets some company as well.
Just trying it out of the box....
I have a lot of mixed feelings on this. What are your thoughts?
I'm not sure they're germane as it's not me or my relationship. I've tried polyamory several times and have found that I'm ill-equipped (or maybe I need to learn and grow a bit) for giving multiple partners what they need and deserve. Do you both have past experiences that you can leverage to make this work? Do you know how each of you functions and responds in a dynamic with more than two partners?
Right - my response to that one would be to throw him in a maids outfit, make him clean the house and care for the kids then ass fuck him and inform him he'll be baby sitting while I go out on a date with one of my boyfriends but then that's just me.....good luck with his fantasy I'm betting that's not happening!
Bunny12
Bunny Rabbits cute and fuzzy they want to love you but they have razor sharp teeth - don't piss them off!
