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Can you really ever stop loving someone after a relationship is over?
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Active Ink Slinger
My answer is a roundabout one. Love is an energy, and energy cannot be destroyed, but can be transmuted. Love can become hate, or less dynamically become indifference. My first wife, after 8 years of mutually bashing each other's brains out, and I ended our 'marriage'. When it was finally over, the ink had dried on the final divorce decree, the dust had settled, I expected to feel a great wave of emotion. What I felt was ....nothing. I was dead inside, drained, empty of all regard, all nostalgia, even the memories had taken on a sepia tone like old photographs mined from the bottom of an abandoned old trunk. I analyzed what had happened and came to this conclusion. We both claimed to have loved the other. She married me to get away from her home where everyone was terrorized and dominated by her alcoholic father. I married her to have a constant ready source of sex. Guess who got what they were after?
So, my feelings for her died totally. I wished her no harm and no good either. My 'love' had transmuted into indifference.
So, my feelings for her died totally. I wished her no harm and no good either. My 'love' had transmuted into indifference.
Active Ink Slinger
Maybe! If you're too sad or empty during the relationship, and after the breakup if you're feeling free finally, then you'd be glad that the relationship has come to an end, and you won't even feel a pint of love.
Active Ink Slinger
I personally think you can still love that person. I know even though, it's been 3 years now we both have moved on. I truly love my last girlfriend n always will....
Active Ink Slinger
Yes! I had 2 relationships end and there has been no looking back. It was painful and my darkest days but it brought me to where I am now. They weren't the right kind of love for me.
Active Ink Slinger
For me- Absolutely.
Southern Barefoot Angel
Over time you stop loving them I'm sure. My last long term relationship was special and I learned so much from him and he said he learned from me but it just wasn't meant to be but he opened my eyes to so many things that I didn't notice about myself. He will always have a special place in my heart. I believe people come in to our lives for a reason.. he came along when my self confidence was at a low point and my faith in men was non existent. He worked so hard to rebuild those and I'm forever grateful to him for that .
Active Ink Slinger
I thought I wouldn't get over her, we split when I wouldn't go and live with her. She was spiteful to my new girlfriend and didn't want any contact from me even as just a friend.
Easy I just hit the delete button and blocked the bitch.
Easy I just hit the delete button and blocked the bitch.
Life is not a rehearsal!!
The Goddess
I am a romantic and love with my whole being. However, once someone has chosen to leave me or not want my love, I make the choice not to waste time pinning (after a short period of grieving). I firmly believe you receive the love you feel you deserve. I deserve to be loved and cherished, and I am!
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Every second of every day. 💕💝
Active Ink Slinger
You mean when the pain is gone, you've cried a bucket of tears, sworn you won't ever let anyone close again, screamed at the world because you just want to curl up and die?
I wonder if it's the memories that hold the love.
I wonder if it's the memories that hold the love.
Weaver of Words
I think a lot of things come into play in getting over someone. what caused the breakup? what was the exact nature of the relationship? perhaps even how long the relationship lasted. I think some people are in love with the idea of love, and therefore tend to fall in and out of love frequently. I think some people lie to themselves about how they really feel. but if the relationship was real and the reason for the breakup had nothing to do with infidelity or other negative reasons, then I don't think you ever stop loving that person in some corner of your heart. if the reason for the breakup is a negative reason, then I think you need to get past the pain, at which point the love will fade - sometimes fast, sometimes slowly.
Active Ink Slinger
I think it's very normal to keep some of those feelings unless they did something terrible. Not only normal but maybe even healthy. How would this world be if we could all just shut down our feelings at the end of something that big in our lives.
Active Ink Slinger
Sure can. Block it all out and move on to more compatible arenas. Forget 'em like yesterday's news!
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Active Ink Slinger
You still get the pain but with time less often.
Active Ink Slinger
That one person still haunts me from time to time. Cause what we had seemed so right and perfect at the time. Most of the time I do great then it comes back to me like a flood. I still think about him all the time regardless and sometimes I compare others to him. Cause he was what I wanted and needed.
Sultan of Smut
It's possible for me. I truly did love my soon-to-be ex wife at one time. But after everything, I feel more emotion looking at a candy bar than looking at her. I don't hate her or love her; I simply wish to not be around her.
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Advanced Wordsmith
I think it really depends on how things ended. Personally I've had a lot of really bad relationships where I try not to think about my exes anymore. But I was just dumped by the woman I'd been dating for two years, and I think that if she hadn't hurt me as badly as she did(in the reasons behind her breaking up with me and how she did it) I would probably still be pining after her. So yeah, its definitely possible to stop, and I think the deciding factor is the pain your partner put you through.
Advanced Wordsmith
I think it really depends on how things ended. Personally I've had a lot of really bad relationships where I try not to think about my exes anymore. But I was just dumped by the woman I'd been dating for two years, and I think that if she hadn't hurt me as badly as she did(in the reasons behind her breaking up with me and how she did it) I would probably still be pining after her. So yeah, its definitely possible to stop, and I think the deciding factor is the pain your partner put you through.
Active Ink Slinger
I've found it very difficult because love doesn't just disappear. The intensity of passion does fade away slowly with the passage of time though...
I like the way you make me feel even when I'm nowhere near...
Rainbow Warrior
Yes, years ago I had a sexual relationship with a guy I thought I loved, but he turned into a complete asshole, and now I can't stand him. The difficulty is that I am his daughter's godmother and she and I are still very close.
