dude. it's like, ok, nice house, i guess. it's brown, kind of square, and unimaginative. probably nice in side, but the exterior doesn't inspire me to think that it's anything beyond pleasant. Now, THAT house. Damn. it's got stained glass windows, it's purple, it's 2 stories, someone strung colored lights on it, i bet the inside is funky and fun and god, it's eye candy - maybe not practical, but it makes me want to go inside and check it out. sometimes you just like something pretty to look at, i mean, seriously, if we're talking one night stands or fantasies, we want prime rib, not turkey burgers to fuel our desires. call me shallow, but yeah, if two guys are sitting together, and one of them is hot, and the others a bit of a slob, my interest is, on first glance, going to be for the hottie, as i define 'hot'. it's human nature.
You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.
Women are wired differently then men. Men are much more visual and sex is a much higher priority for men then it is for most women. Women, at least most women, want romance and sweet words and a man of character; at least that's what I want. When you have sex with a person you care about and respect it is so much better then just fucking. Animals fuck...I want a man that I can make love to and will make love to me as well. Most men just see with their eyes and their cocks...but a true gentleman will see with his heart as well. When you find one that sees with his heart don't let him go!!!
It's about the aesthetics of beauty and physical attraction.
Yes, a lot of people/cultures/whatever are attracted to different things and uphold different standards of beauty - I don't see it in that narrow a way myself, but if we're *strictly* talking about biological urge and sexual attraction - that need or desire to 'fuck' someone - the last thing you're thinking about when you see a guy is what his personality is like, what's his IQ or whether he has a kind soul.
When people look at porn, dirty pictures, fantasizing about strangers - they are going for the physical attributes that turn them on the most - chiseled abs, broad shoulders, angular features, or whatever floats your boat. Like that moment before orgasm, you're in the moment - all physical, muscles tensing - it's raw and primal. That's kind of like what natural sexual attraction is as well. You just feel it, you don't overthink it.
If you're talking about "making love", relationships, and all that complex stuff, sexual attraction gets put on a scale with all the other important things that make us human and they have to balance out to something positive. This is the 'logic' side of attraction. Very different from the instinctive desire to copulate/mate with what we think is a hot specimen.
Biology is a part of it to be sure - strip away the pretences, we are still animals.
When I first started working in a place of ill-repute, there was a woman there who had a "butt-pon". Her sphincter muscles no longer operated right, so she stuck tissue in her ass to prevent anal-leakage. This was an eye-opener for me. Nevertheless, I opened my ass for some anal sex some time later. Not gonna lie, it's not my favorite. But I wouldn't know unless I tried, right? So, spread those cheeks, Daisy. A good corn-holin' might suit you.
But this thread is about pure visuals, right? Oh yes. I never had a one night stand because a guy was fugly. Just saying. We need more than looks, for sure. But will a smokin-hot guy make my body stir? You bet your puckered ass it will.
Leave it to Jack to change a thread about looks, to anal sex.... wait she stucked tissues in her ass?? wow, im just trying to do the math of how many times did she do it, for her to get like that... and know i cant stop wondering how many tissues did she use daily.
I just looked through that thread. Do we have an OMG emoticon?
If we put aside the whole "How the feck does THAT fit inside?!", then only one of them was anywhere vaguely in the realm of "might like to snog him".
I have established I'm definitely not a fan of slim, bumpy tummy lads if it's based solely on looks. So that's something.
Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.
***
********************************CLICK THE BANNERS TO BUY THESE WILLY-STIFFENING BOOKS!********************************
We all are different. My taste might not be your taste. But when I look at a guy that is all buff I can see he is good looking, he just doesn't make my bits tingle.
Bunker Love
My Dream my latest stopry
Daisy - it could just be that you're attracted to heavier set guys, so the athletic types in that thread won't really get your motor running.
If you've never seen (either in person or pics online or on TV/movies) *any* guy that you've ever been sexually attracted to, then you might just be the type of person that needs an emotional connection or relationship or commitment to even fathom feeling turned on to someone.
I think guys (for the most part) are in touch with their basic, primal urges when it comes to sexual attraction ie. they see a hot girl and they want to fuck her (even on a subconscious level). I think women are more diverse - a lot of us are in tune with our purely primal/sexual side and can be attracted to someone we think is hot even though we don't know anything about them. If you enjoy sex purely for the physical pleasure of it - you will know what you're attracted to and what you're not.
Some women don't have these instincts though - they need a deeper connection, although I would argue that even then - with the guys they naturally want to get to know - there has to be some baseline level of attraction there - some reason why they want to learn more about Joe rather than Bob. It may not be about sex right away, but there is *always* some kind of barometer of attraction going on when we see someone, purely on a physical first impression basis.
If I gave you 30 photos of different kinds of guys and said place them in order from the guy you like most to the least just based on attraction and you said they all seemed exactly the same to you until you get to know them, then I'd say - knock back a few drinks and try again. People can definitely overthink things (even attraction), but sometimes when they drop their inhibitions, they start acting on a more instinctive level. This is why some women start the night out at the bar thinking that they're not attracted to any of the guys and then by closing time when they've had a lot to drink, they've found a few prospects that can get their panties wet.
I personally think that for females, or at least in my own experience, physical attraction comes from a good experience. And you're saying you haven't any experience so in my eyes it's not surprising that you don't get turned on just by how someone looks.
The only 'look' that I go gaga for is the tanned, dark eyed, dark & floppy haired, tall guys.... and it was with a guy that looked like this that I had my first really great sex session with. He was nice, too, which helped.
To carry on this theory I personally was never attracted to blonde guys...however, I have since had a relationship with a blonde guy that I enjoyed at the time and whom I had an excellent sexual relationship with. Bam. I'm now also finding myself physically attracted to blonde guys at first glance - which I never, ever, found happened before said relationship.
Don't beat yourself up about it. When you're ready to, get some experience and your tastes and attractions will build from there.
i think u just not have met that man that makes your whole body flush..with desire
that u spend all day just thinking about being intimate with them
or maybe u are turned on by the cerbral...instead of the physical
have these men tickled your brain as well??
What about life gets u excited and dizzy with emotion?
A man that shares that lust..might make u change your...mind....
unless of course you have had some trauma in your life...concerning a man..then..
that changes...the whole....picture
Could you, on an unconscious level, be dismissing even figures of fantasy solely on the reason of "well they'd never be interested in me"?
Rather pedantic I Know, I'm sure you meant Subconscious.
That being said, the general point is a well made one.
Regarding the attraction you mention in your post (and many have concurred with this point) the attraction is based on a response to your senses, whether the attraction is caused by a visual stimulus (wash board abs for example) or sound (timbre or tone of voice) touch (smooth, rough, etc) smell (Karate or Brute aftershave for example) and Taste (Lovely cookies [not a euphemism]) the brain reacts to those stimuli, carried out a series of checks and balances and returns an outcome, I like the taste of cookies, I'm not a huge fan of Brute for instance.
The same thing happens when we are attracted, the visual is processed and the brain reacts accordingly, if we find someone attractive the brain knows that a certain set of responses is required and this is a lot to do with the movement towards pleasure and the avoidance of pain (there are molar memories that...well that's another story). I would suggest that, as with many of the comments, you broaden your experiences, find out what you like and go from there. then when you next see an attractive rugby club type chap, your brain will know the best way to respond to that stimuli.
As with learning any new skill, practice really does (generally) make perfect, although if we achieve perfection..sorry...that is also another story.
Anyhow, I wish you well in your quest for that allusive attraction...
Note to self.
Engage brain before engaging in any other activity.