Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login

Age,does it matter?

last reply
188 replies
24.2k views
1 watcher
19 likes
Ok, so i am at the moment with a guy who... Is quite a bit older than me I'll leave it at, more than... 10 years. I would like to ask all you Lushies, if age really effects the relationship or does it not?
Since you come from two different generations your way of looking at the world are different, therefore your way of relating to things can be a bit hard to match.
Me, I'm with a man who's more than 20 years older than me and though it's clearly noticeable in some situations it's not even close to being a problem for the relationship to work.
I don't know. Most of the guys I've ever had sex with are older than me - but the oldest was 35 when I was 19. There was an obvious generation gap between us which contributed to our break up after just 4 months. However .. a girl I know same age as me at 23 has formed a liason with a 48 year old man. Maybe the fact that he lives in a £2 million pound house and drives the finest cars had an influence on her decision.
In theory, age doesnt matter. However, I think there are the obvious generation gaps and maturity differences that can affect a relationship. Bit really, if you find someone that makes you happy and it doesn't bother either of you .. Who cares what the age difference is.
No, I choose mind over matter. It's a meeting of minds that matters.
My husband is 11 years older than I, and we've been married for 12 years today. We dated for a fairly long time before that, too. We have similar upbringings, and similar interests, so we seldom notice the age difference, these days. It was a far bigger gap when I was 19 and he was 30... less so, now that I'm 37 and he's 48.
Does age matter? This is a question that will bring up much discussion and even more disagreement among such a large community as this as well as society as a whole. Who is to say what is acceptable and what is not concerning age as long as both parties are over the age of consent. There is no scale that you can say that these two people are okay to be together as they are a few years apart and these two are not because there maybe 5, 10 or even 20 years difference.

If two people are compatible on many different levels then why should age matter? There are some 30 and 40 year olds that act very immature and there are some 20 something year olds that are very mature. It should be based on qualities that attract two people together common likes, dislikes, similar interests sexually and non, being able to hold a conversation about anything. I believe its one’s mind and heart that matter. If you can say that the person you are interested in has all the qualities you look for and the other sees those in you, age should not even be a factor.
Not at all. Age really doesn't matter, my girlfriend is 7 years older than me, and my boyfriend is 28 years older than me.
I agree with those who have said it is not the age it is the maturity, when it comes to a relationship. I know several people that are near in age and don't have a stable relationship/marriage. I also know the opposite. I have friends in real life and on here that are older and younger than me and I have great conversations with them. If they say something that I don't understand I ask them to explain. I feel I learn more that way. It would be nice to return to the 'old' ways and have a multi-generational households: children, parents, grandparents... all living together. You can learn from 'older' generations and they stay young being with young people.
...I thought that maybe a new life, a different life, wouldn’t be so bad. But where the hell did I put the receipt, and could you return something that was over twenty years old? Where do you go to get a new life when your old one has you so puzzled you don’t know how to fix it? Wish I knew.
-Anita Blake (Laurell K. Hamilton)
Ok so this is my first post on here but i dont tend to speak up on matters unless they have meaning to me and this one does. Age for the most part is only a number, but if you have a connection with someone and care for that person then the age shouldnt matter. It may cause bumps in the road so to speak but life is never without problems. If two people care for one another then the only thing that should matter is taking those bumps hand in hand with each other and getting through each problem together. There is no right or wrong there is really only emotion and action and how we chose to deal with them.
Age is in the mind! My wife is 13 years older than I am. And we have been married for 10 years now without a single significant fight.
oops..... did not notice the heart in my post cracks
yes and no
i have been in a relationship with a guy 7 years older then me
and its just hes not thinking the way i do he just dont like things i like
its like i m feeling always with energy wanna go somewhere n have fun but hes like a home bird.
it didnt work for me
but i do believe it might work for other ppl if they have similar wish/mind with their partner
I agree with Clu3 ^ Like I'm 18 and would preferably like a girl the same age, a few years higher is fine, but I wouldn't go out with a 30 year old silly
Emotional and personality age matters more than physical age does. My first long term relationship was with a girl with 2 months age difference, I've tended to prefer considerably younger girls since then (many 12 to 16 years my junior, one nearly 28 years my junior) and there were some activity issues (at 38 with a 22 yo girlfriend, I really didn't want to try skydiving with her, but I did, she was also into distance running, me not so much, but we broke up just before a planned trip out west to do some rock climbing) but I guess I must be a bit immature for my age, because on that level, all my relationships with much younger girls was great.
My former mistress was ten years older then myself. My fiance is also ten years older. I guess I have a decade thing lol.

Just as long as you are over 20 and lived a bit then I don't see the harm.

Look at director Sam Taylor Wood and Aaron Johnson.



Their relationship is 24 years difference. He is currently 22 and he has father two daughters to her. Not only that they are also married.
"Sexual pleasure in woman is a kind of magic spell; it demands complete abandon; if words or movements oppose the magic of caresses, the spell is broken."

Simone de Beauvoir
Quote by TheGulfCoaster
but I guess I must be a bit immature for my age, because on that level, all my relationships with much younger girls was great.

I dont think it has anything to do with your maturity i think it has more something to do with your willingness to try new things as well as work at your relationships or at leas thats how it sounds to me
Quote by musicluver

I dont think it has anything to do with your maturity i think it has more something to do with your willingness to try new things as well as work at your relationships or at leas thats how it sounds to me


Could be! I do prefer younger women (legal women of course)
Both serious relationships i have had with men, they have been older, one 3 years and one about 6 years. I would have been ok with a slightly younger man, but not more than maybe 5 years my junior. Now that I have discovered women, I seem to be attracted to women somewhat younger than me, some less than half my age (all of legal age of course). Though I am not sure what i would do IRL if someone half my age actually wanted to be with me.
You have to follow your heart, but there are a lot of variables that make relationships work. The more common ground, the better your chances of success. But in the end, if they make you happy more than anyone else, then you're where you're supposed to be.
i have to say no as long as there is a connection then go for it
It depends, if one or more person is under 20 I would say most likely yes, at that age even a few years can be a big difference and a 20 year old dating a 16 year old is just skeezy.

However after those ages I don't think it really does, provided the two people get along and one isn't manipulating or exploiting the other then who cares.
Quote by Catnip
Since you come from two different generations your way of looking at the world are different, therefore your way of relating to things can be a bit hard to match.
Me, I'm with a man who's more than 20 years older than me and though it's clearly noticeable in some situations it's not even close to being a problem for the relationship to work.

I have to agree with catnip. The age difference is only a problem if you let it. Me being with an older man has never been a problem. But I was raised by my grandparents so I could relate to the majoriy of the thing he spoke of. Age has never been a factor for me.
Love and caring is what matters age is just a number.
As others have said, age is just a number and what matters more is compatibility and maturity level. My wife and I are 17 years apart, and yet we connect on many levels and yet have very different backgrounds. Emotionally, we are about the same but she is more effective at expressing her feelings. I enjoy learning her life experience from her perspective and she loves the same from me. The different slang is fun, music (of course), and lots of other pop culture stuff. Even morals have changed in the 17 years between us and we love talking about that as well. I love my sexy young lady and she love her old man.
There is never no right or wrong answer, because each relationship is very different. I was engaged to a man who is 7 years older than me, from my failed personal experience here is what I can say to you with the hopes that your experience is not the same... If you guys share a lot of common thoughts and interests, it helps a lot. I think that's pretty much a universal foundation for any prosperous relationship. Another thing is, some things that may be very important to you (e.g.: going out, blogging, music, how often to stay in touch, experiences, etc.) may not be as important to him. Maturity comes into play as well, someone can be 30, but they may act 13. There are multiple things that you need to pay attention to when coming to your final decision.
I can only answer for myself of course, but for me - Ive found that compatibility (both emotional and sexual) rests alot on shared values and common goals. I dated a guy 10 years younger than myself and though in many ways we were perfect together, we were at different life stages and levels of maturity.... so it didnt work out. The older I get, the more I appreciate men of my own age and life stage, men I can learn from and laugh with.
Quote by Han135
Ok, so i am at the moment with a guy who... Is quite a bit older than me I'll leave it at, more than... 10 years. I would like to ask all you Lushies, if age really effects the relationship or does it not?
[My girlfriend is 30 years younger than me and we have been together for over 7 years and are compatible in every sense].
why does this topic obsess you basil if we cant talk directly i will bow out as gracefully as a spice junkie can rember how tricky my avatar is pass it from right to left flip it over and over i will teach you to throw it later mliarrr
Quote by ethanjubal
why does this topic obsess you basil if we cant talk directly i will bow out as gracefully as a spice junkie can rember how tricky my avatar is pass it from right to left flip it over and over i will teach you to throw it later mliarrr


I am sorry, but what did you just say? I need to take some English classes.


Age in numbers doesn't matter, if partners 'aged' similarly, have similar experiences in their lives.. Chemistry between people is more important than that number..but I guess all of this can be counted for every relationship.