Several years ago my wife had her gallbladder removed. One of the sideeffects of having a gallbladder removed is excess gas. In my wife's gas, this is "should be registered as a chemical weapon" gas. She has also regaind some (but not all) of the weight she lost with gastric bypass surgery (the
gallblader is often removed with this type of surgery). We still have children at home, so divorce is not an option. I just want to get it on with a
normal sized (and good smelling) woman, what do I do?
Wow, you're a dick. Just divorce her if you don't care for her. Better to do that than put your entire family through shit and have them resent you later on in life.
All I can say is........Wow and oh wait.......Shame on you. Not once did you say you did not love her just.......wow. I am going to stop there...
um .... for better for worse ... so because she has put on some weight and suffers from flatulence thats it is it?? oh dear ... I hope you never become unwell in your lifetime ... enough said I think.
Ha! She probably says the same thing about you - at least she has a reason O.o
Evil Brain Angel Heart - E.B.A.H
I have one tip that might help with this smell. Get your head out of your ass.
Maybe you should reconsider the wording of your post. Perhaps you're trying to say you care about her and the kids but are no longer physically attracted. These things can happen perhaps some counselling may help?
Well I think it is a good thing you put it the way you feel.... Makes very clear what kind of a person you are.... An ass.
"For better for worse" seems to ring a bell, she needs your support not abuse!
You really seem awful, but I'm feeling oddly uncranky today, so I'll make a couple of suggestions.
Try to remember why you married her in the first place. Try to remember why you love her. If you didn't have a good reason, or you don't, or you can't remember, then divorce might be the best option; and if that's the case, you probably should point out to your wife when bringing it up that you're an enormous asshole for putting her through being married to you.
To be fair, we've all responded knowing that you're an asshole, and assuming she's completely lovely. Maybe she's got her own set of personality issues, but you're definitely a jerk. As a side-note, you sound like so much of a jerk, I kind of doubt anybody's going to want to bang you once you are separated from your wife.
Ok, let met set the record staight, I am not an ass. The way I set it, the selfish thing to do would a divorce. See that way the money I set aside for the kids' college fund would to child support, and I wouldn't be there to take the kids to school in the morning, or take the them the dentist or band practice, or school rehersal, etc. For the sake of the children I'm staying in the marraige. The selfish thing would be to leave.
Incidentally, I was there with my wife when her father and helped clean out her grandmother's apartment when her grandmother had to go into a nursing home. I als listen to her when she complains about "so and so" at work. Yet despite my support support groups etc,. she still hides sweets like an alcoholic hides booze.
Imagine your significant other 75 pounds overweight, often stinky with gas, and poor knees, and kids who need your daily love and attention, and look me in the eye and try to tell me I'm ass. I'm just human.
I don't know of anyone who just goes out looking to have an affair, it just happens. Swingers are swingers, its what they do. If you live in neveda, go to a cathouse like most, but without her agreeing to this would be wrong. You need to have a talk with her and work this out.
Damn! You can plan a pretty pick nick but you can't predict the weather. If you're looking for an affair then just move on. Your kids will be better off without an asshole cheating on their mom. Sounds like you we're never in love but just in lust. It's better to be alone then miserable. Just leave her alone and go be miserable checking out the greener grass on the other side of the road.
Till death or she gets fat do we part. Damn, I thought I sucked at relationships
Maybe she should divorce you, you obviously don't love her. you should learn to share your problems together you made a vow when you married!
Ok. This might get deleted but hey its worth a try. First, its not about you. If your wife had the gastric bypass surgery and has foul gas (not that your guess smells like roses) then something is wrong. She may need to change her diet and she could add beano. Also it sounds as though she may need to add a probiotic to her diet. By the way, if it doesnt stink then something really bad is wrong. I worked in a hospital and came across some really bad smells. I have yet to vomit over gas. I think you need to look at your own self. Im sure you are not perfect....from your post I would say far from it.
I'm just gonna alienate everyone and make everyone hate me straight away. If what he tells about his wife acting the way she does, about the hiding chocolate like alcoholics hide booze, and all that stuff, no wonder the man isn't happy. For all we know she can be a total nagging bitch that goes to work and comes home and bitch about everything all day to him and then goes off to wallow in self pity with a big bag of M&M's.
Yeah, OP does come off as a selfish bastard there's no doubt about that, if you disregard the part where he stays in the marriage simply because then they'll be able to put money into the kids college funds and get them a proper education. But one thing is for certain; having an affair is not a good option. If she finds out(and usually at some point they do) then you'll end up with an angry wife(and rightfully so) and the kids get to see mum and dad argue like they're ready to declare war at each other. Being a divorce kid I know from personal experience that just the arguments even if it doesn't end up with a divorce and the knowledge that "Daddy is a cheater" you suddenly lose your kid's respect. In the same way there's a chance the kids feel they'll be forced to pick sides, and that's even worse. So if your main concern is your kids, then don't have an affair. In the end it is them that will suffer. So having an affair is more selfish than the divorce.
You need to either sort shit out with your wife or get a divorce. Both options are messy and hard. Should you pick the first one then you have to, maybe for the first time in your marriage, stand up to your wife and tell her to stop acting like she's doing and get her life sorted or else you're taking the kids and leaving. I think you both need help, and especially her, if there's ever to be any hope to save the marriage.
On this one, I'm not siding with either part. I'm with the kids.
Ok, my go.
Do you really want an affair? Do you have any idea what that will entail and the pressures it will put on your marriage? Do you want an extra marital relationship or are you just after some no-strings sex from someone younger, more attractive and happy not to have more from the relationship.
If you find someone willing to have an affair with you, you have to keep them happy; be it taking them out to dinner, buying them presents, the occasional weekend away (yeah you'll have to come up with a few excuses for that - as well as hiding your credit card bill). Invariably the cheaper and easier option for you is to become a regular client of a local prostitute - you keep it professional, you can see her when you want (within reason), she'll listen to you moan and whine about your awful life but she won't ask you're going to leave your wife or why you can't stay the night on her birthday.
You get what you're looking for: someone you find attractive, a sympathetic ear and you get laid. Of course you have to pay for it but an affair usually turns out to be just as expensive if not more so. I would also think that if she found out, your wife would be less disappointed in you if she found out you'd been seeing a prostitute than if you'd been having an affair. If you were in the Uk I'd recommend finding someone via punternet - I'm sure there are escort girl review websites for your area.
Your wife sounds like she's having a rough old time of late - it wouldn't be any surprise if she's developed some kind of minor eating disorder giving the stress of surgery and a failing marriage. You want her to get better, try and be a bit more sympathetic to her. Don't use the kids as an excuse for staying in the comfort of marriage, right now they're growing up seeing the relationship you have with your wife and thinking that is how a normal relationship is. The mistakes you make now will be repeated by them.
Warning: The opinions above are those of an anonymous individual on the internet. They are opinions, unless they're facts. They may be ill-informed, out of touch with reality or just plain stupid. They may contain traces of irony. If reading these opinions causes you to be become outraged or you start displaying the symptoms of outrage, stop reading them immediately. If symptoms persist, consult a psychiatrist.
Why not read some stories instead
NEW! Want a quick read for your coffee break? Why not try this... Flash Erotica: Scrubber I'll admit, I never had a real relationship, so I obviously have an idealised view of what it must be like, and no actual clue. I get that. But there are some parts of relationships that are the same, no matter what the name and details of that relationship.
But why can't people just communicate with each other? Why can't grown adults try to broach the problem with their partner, with a listening ear? There are two people in every relationship like this (discounting people outside the marriage/partnership who may be involved), and it is up to them to communicate their needs and desires, and and listen to the other's, surely?
Why are you looking to us for answers about what you should do? Talk to your wife and/or maybe a close friend or counsellor who knows you, and work out together what will be best not only for you two, but as Elit says, your children. And if she doesn't want to talk to you about what her issues are, you tried, and that should give you some clue as to what your next move should be.
Ut incepit fidelis, sic permanet.
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