Box Dreams
if everyone had a box
as nice as mine
full of tissue and nip
and feathers on twine
then no one would fight
and all wars would end
and people would be happy and free
if i ruled the world
and i almost do
i'd give everyone their own box
to play in and nap in and dream
and feed everyone mice
and make the sun shine
so they'd rub my belly real nice
Cleo el Gato
You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.
I have heard rumors that people believe the blonde girl writes my masterpieces. I assure you, she is a talent-less hack and incapable of such works of art.
The New Couch
The new couch is off limits,
so the blond girl says,
at least for scratching and biting
so i will bite and scratch her instead
The new couch smells funky
and not yet of cat
a day of shedding and napping
will solve that
The new couch has cushions
that aren't yet dimpled and cozy
I am not sure I like it
even though it now belongs to me.
Cleo le Chat
You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.
You've been awfully quiet lately Cleo. Whatsamatter? Cat got your tongue?
My name is John and I was a skunk
A snip here and a snip there and now I am a cat
I don’t smell anymore and no longer spray for fun
But damn I am so good at catching a rat
Milk and Whiskers for breakfast
Dry biscuits for lunch
A long nap in the afternoon
Steak and chips for brunch
It’s such a hard life being a cat
The day is long and the chores I do in a rush
But then there is the evening
When I can login to Lush
RR surely!
A Fish Tale
Ruling over a new home
Is a splendid duty
With each evening roam
A novel discovery
It echoed like a pond
Thus I had to inspect
Still the scene was beyond
All I could expect
The daft human comatose
In nefarious waters
A proper bath I suppose
After endless showers
'Twas all so absurd
Yet time swiftly slowed
As a prey gently stirred
And arose hunter-mode
The marvel galvanized
My eyes, claws and back
But the man horrified
Put a hand on my snack
The stuff seemed so good
Though it felt like a trick
As I soon understood
It was only his dick
- Bobby, aka SereneProdigy's badass cat
(Inspired by recent true events, haha)
The crazy Brit down the road
Hates me with a passion,
She smiles and moves away
As I roll into action
Belly up mewing
She passes without a care!
That's why I lay there plotting,
Acting cute will work one day
I'll ribbon her ankles rotten.
Sprites cat
Running from room to room.
I want to be here, no I need to be there!
My job isn't complete,
until everything is covered in my hair.
And when I finish playing,
it's time for a nap.
But where shall I sleep,
when your hand won't leave your lap?
The thing about sleep is,
I can sleep anywhere.
From the oddest perch,
to your most valuable chair .
Your lap is ideal,
when you're trying to work.
Claws kneading thighs,
until it drives you berserk.
Otherwise your shoe,
or curled up in that box.
The strangely smelling one,
filled with the plastic cocks.
I have such a wonderful life!
I've trained you well.
Now go buy me a collar,
with a shiny silver bell.
Wretched human
Tried to costume me
For her pitiful Facebook page
She dared to adorn
My regal self
For ridicule and embarrassment
I hope the wounds heal
in time for dinner
sardine cans don't open themselves
Tonight human, tonight...