There was a young lady from Arden
Who was giving some head in the garden
Her mother said "Flo,
Where does it all go?"
And Flo said (gulp) "Beg your pardon?"
No number, just joining in the fun.
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Gimme a dirty limerick... maybe win GOLD! [WINNER ANNOUNCED!]
Lurker
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There was a young lady from Todd
Who wanted a baby from god
It weren't the almighty that went up her nighty
It was the vicar the dirty old sod..
No 58
Who wanted a baby from god
It weren't the almighty that went up her nighty
It was the vicar the dirty old sod..
No 58
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Burquette, there's a snag with your game
All those numbers unused is a shame
Might I propose
Multiple goes
Or are you a 'one-and-done' dame?
All those numbers unused is a shame
Might I propose
Multiple goes
Or are you a 'one-and-done' dame?
Rookie Scribe
0 likes
I knew a girl named Tiffany
She was somewhat of infamy
She used her tits and ass as tactics
Me? She was unapologetic
As she felt my dick briskly...
She was somewhat of infamy
She used her tits and ass as tactics
Me? She was unapologetic
As she felt my dick briskly...
Bug
0 likes
Quote by dlcalguy
Burquette, there's a snag with your game
All those numbers unused is a shame
Might I propose
Multiple goes
Or are you a 'one-and-done' dame?
Hi there, dlCalguy
That was an awfully nice try
So we don't stack the fun
I accept only one
(Which is also how I fuck, by the by)
One number per person, but add as many limericks as you like to the thread.
Coco Pop
0 likes
She requested a dirty limerick
So I wrote one about the world's best dick
But it had no wit
So I labelled it shit
And resumed my role as Tracy K Flick
Number 18, please!
So I wrote one about the world's best dick
But it had no wit
So I labelled it shit
And resumed my role as Tracy K Flick
Number 18, please!
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Sweet Sue was a young subcontractor
But her fiancee dumped her and sacked her
Inspections showed
She was not up to code
Being no longer virgo intacta.
But her fiancee dumped her and sacked her
Inspections showed
She was not up to code
Being no longer virgo intacta.
God Empress of Lush
0 likes
I've had a go already, but here's another just for fun.
Young Annie had sweet little breasts
That she loved to show off to her guests.
One day for a lark
She did things in the park
That ended in several arrests.
Young Annie had sweet little breasts
That she loved to show off to her guests.
One day for a lark
She did things in the park
That ended in several arrests.
22 February 2024 - How about a quick plug for one of my filthiest recent stories? It's all in the title - Naked Pool Party Swingers | Lush Stories Please read, comment and maybe give it a ❤️ - or even a⭐ if you really enjoy it! Thank you! Annie xxx
Lurker
0 likes
His penis was strikingly thin,
Small too – the length of a pin
I tried to be kind
Said I didn’t mind
But had to guess when it went in
Small too – the length of a pin
I tried to be kind
Said I didn’t mind
But had to guess when it went in
Rookie Scribe
0 likes
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin
If my ear was a cunt I would fuck it
#56
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin
If my ear was a cunt I would fuck it
#56
The Creep
0 likes
Let me try 
There once was a toy named dildo
Who goes in and out of a slippery hole
In his moments of use
He heard her scream and moan
"FUCK!" followed by his golden shower
#12
There once was a toy named dildo
Who goes in and out of a slippery hole
In his moments of use
He heard her scream and moan
"FUCK!" followed by his golden shower
#12
Bug
0 likes
We're down to our LAST DAY to offer a limerick and be in the running for GOLD!
Tomorrow (8/1), end of MY day I'm closing the giveaway (36ish hours from now). I'll match numbers with names on the opening post and give everyone a chance to yell at me if I get one wrong.
Then, on 8/3, I'll use a random number generator to pick a winner ('cause I ain't judging these gems). I'll announce on this thread who the winner is!
I just LOVED this. Thank you to everyone who posted!
Tomorrow (8/1), end of MY day I'm closing the giveaway (36ish hours from now). I'll match numbers with names on the opening post and give everyone a chance to yell at me if I get one wrong.
Then, on 8/3, I'll use a random number generator to pick a winner ('cause I ain't judging these gems). I'll announce on this thread who the winner is!
I just LOVED this. Thank you to everyone who posted!
Lurker
0 likes
Quote by naughtyannie
I've had a go already, but here's another just for fun.
Young Annie had sweet little breasts
That she loved to show off to her guests.
One day for a lark
She did things in the park
That ended in several arrests.
Just for fun, eh?
Two can play that game. Plus, I LOOOOOOOVE me some limericks.
There once was a hottie named Annie
Who enjoyed firm wacks on her fanny
But if you slapped unalert
On the tenth strike she'd squirt
To a distance that was uncanny.
God Empress of Lush
0 likes
Quote by AllisonFinch
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
As he wiped off his chin
If my ear was a cunt I would fuck it
#56
Hmm. Someone's already done this one (OldJock Thursday, July 19, 2018 5:11:09 AM). It wasn't exactly original even then.
22 February 2024 - How about a quick plug for one of my filthiest recent stories? It's all in the title - Naked Pool Party Swingers | Lush Stories Please read, comment and maybe give it a ❤️ - or even a⭐ if you really enjoy it! Thank you! Annie xxx
Lurker
0 likes
Gagged and blindfolded while on the bed
And with both ankles behind her head
Not with one tongue but three
They played with her cunny
Giving her multi-orgasmic head
And with both ankles behind her head
Not with one tongue but three
They played with her cunny
Giving her multi-orgasmic head
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
Annie seeks out something new
Original poems so blue
Well bend over dear
I'll cover your rear
With several helpings of goo.
I suspect that Annie would binge
On acts that would make others cringe
She's off to the shops
In the briefest of tops
And multiple toys up her minge.
It's strangers she cannot resist
I've begged her but she won't desist
When she goes out dogging
The limelight she's hogging
With some guy there, up to his wrist.
We've never messaged or met
I'm crossing a line I will bet
But I stayed for a while
Reading Annie's profile
And know she's a seasoned coquette.
Original poems so blue
Well bend over dear
I'll cover your rear
With several helpings of goo.
I suspect that Annie would binge
On acts that would make others cringe
She's off to the shops
In the briefest of tops
And multiple toys up her minge.
It's strangers she cannot resist
I've begged her but she won't desist
When she goes out dogging
The limelight she's hogging
With some guy there, up to his wrist.
We've never messaged or met
I'm crossing a line I will bet
But I stayed for a while
Reading Annie's profile
And know she's a seasoned coquette.
Lurker
0 likes
As I patiently wait for my turn
Reflecting on what soon I might learn
I forgot to wear one
While I had me some fun
Now relieving does trigger a burn
Reflecting on what soon I might learn
I forgot to wear one
While I had me some fun
Now relieving does trigger a burn
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
You ladies can sit on Ping's lap
I think he's a marvellous chap
If you just risk it
He'll give you a biscuit
And maybe a dose of the clap.
I think he's a marvellous chap
If you just risk it
He'll give you a biscuit
And maybe a dose of the clap.
Lurker
0 likes
For my whining she offered some cheese
Mocking me with her taunting and tease
She then stuck in my bum
Both her left and right thumb
And I cried, “Madam, may I cum, please?”
Mocking me with her taunting and tease
She then stuck in my bum
Both her left and right thumb
And I cried, “Madam, may I cum, please?”
Lurker
0 likes
My gal begged that I’d shave her down there
Claiming I’d always wanted her bare
So, I did as she asked
But her motive was masked
She dumped me and now’s dating a Claire
Claiming I’d always wanted her bare
So, I did as she asked
But her motive was masked
She dumped me and now’s dating a Claire
Lurker
0 likes
Through his moans and vociferous cries
She tried her best to filter his lies
Truth is, you like it when
I’m fucking other men
And my cuckold craves messy cream pies
She tried her best to filter his lies
Truth is, you like it when
I’m fucking other men
And my cuckold craves messy cream pies
Lurker
0 likes
With her wages she bought a sex toy
One she’d hoped would bring hours of joy
Was told it’ll be fine
So she ordered online
But was shipped a large stalk of bok choy
One she’d hoped would bring hours of joy
Was told it’ll be fine
So she ordered online
But was shipped a large stalk of bok choy
Lurker
0 likes
Jack be nimble, but Jack’s also quick
Cums too fast when Jill’s riding his dick
So she bid him ciao
And for pleasure now
Uses a phallus-shaped candlestick
Cums too fast when Jill’s riding his dick
So she bid him ciao
And for pleasure now
Uses a phallus-shaped candlestick
God Empress of Lush
0 likes
Quote by dlcalguy
Annie seeks out something new
Original poems so blue
Well bend over dear
I'll cover your rear
With several helpings of goo.
I suspect that Annie would binge
On acts that would make others cringe
She's off to the shops
In the briefest of tops
And multiple toys up her minge.
It's strangers she cannot resist
I've begged her but she won't desist
When she goes out dogging
The limelight she's hoggingT
With some guy there, up to his wrist.
We've never messaged or met
I'm crossing a line I will bet
But I stayed for a while
Reading Annie's profile
And know she's a seasoned coquette.
Oh my! Thank you.
I'm honoured. ❤❤❤ 22 February 2024 - How about a quick plug for one of my filthiest recent stories? It's all in the title - Naked Pool Party Swingers | Lush Stories Please read, comment and maybe give it a ❤️ - or even a⭐ if you really enjoy it! Thank you! Annie xxx
Active Ink Slinger
0 likes
She said that it was an honour
To have my attentions upon her
But if I suggest
That we get undressed
She'll tell me that she doesn't wanna.
To have my attentions upon her
But if I suggest
That we get undressed
She'll tell me that she doesn't wanna.
Primus Omnium
0 likes
She's a slaphappy girl from Paree
Who lives life quite absurd and carefree.
She ties up mens cocks
In pairs of silk socks
Decorated in gold filigree.
5
Who lives life quite absurd and carefree.
She ties up mens cocks
In pairs of silk socks
Decorated in gold filigree.
5
Lurker
0 likes
Left little to imagine or doubt
It halted traffic on my bus route
In the crosswalk she stood
Friggin’ fast as she could
The old lady was rubbing one out
It halted traffic on my bus route
In the crosswalk she stood
Friggin’ fast as she could
The old lady was rubbing one out
Lurker
0 likes
There once was a proud man with two dicks
To get off he required two chicks
Once recovered from shock
They would each grab a cock
And pleasure him with their oral tricks
To get off he required two chicks
Once recovered from shock
They would each grab a cock
And pleasure him with their oral tricks
Lurker
0 likes
I once dated a girl with twelve toes
With four big ones, offset and opposed
She walked with a limped gait
But her foot jobs were great
And she snorted my jizz through her nose
With four big ones, offset and opposed
She walked with a limped gait
But her foot jobs were great
And she snorted my jizz through her nose
God Empress of Lush
0 likes
Quote by Ping
Left little to imagine or doubt
It halted traffic on my bus route
In the crosswalk she stood
Friggin’ fast as she could
The old lady was rubbing one out
I just realised this rhymes best if read in a Scottish accent lol. ???
22 February 2024 - How about a quick plug for one of my filthiest recent stories? It's all in the title - Naked Pool Party Swingers | Lush Stories Please read, comment and maybe give it a ❤️ - or even a⭐ if you really enjoy it! Thank you! Annie xxx