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How did you discover your inner desire for the same sex?

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Please note, this is not a question of when or how old, rather it is a question of how you approached your desire. Did you feel you were breaking a ? We're you reluctant at first, or was it something that you already knew would fill a need?

For me, it was unexpected. I didn't consider myself gay and I had relations with women on several occasions before I first tried it with a man. I was more or less seduced into it and felt both fear and excitment as I realized I was going to go through with it.

Afterward, I was shocked at myself. I felt not a small amount of shame as well, but within a few days I was back for more. I saw him for a couple of weeks and before long I had embraced the act. I still prefer women for the most part, but gay sex has a feel unto itself and I am glad I allowed myself to indulge in it.

Edit: in respect to site rules, I remind any who would like to respond that any references to underage sexual activity is strictly prohibited.
For me I had been curious a few years. I had found when I would slip and look at porn that I looked at the guys as well as the girls.

I had already been with a girl a few times when my opportunity for man on man came up. It just kind of happened in that I never expected it. The guy was slightly older and definitely made all the moves and guided everything.

It was great and parts of it took getting used to. I didn't know right after if I would ever do it again, but in a few days I found out that answer. I've loved both types of sex ever since.
A bit evolutionary actually - working in theatre in college around gays opened my mind up but it was really only a few years ago that I began to admit it to myself, first with fantasies of a mmf three way with my wife - but it really hit me when I looked up one day in a museum and saw a pair of young men together - and realized that I would happily have done almost anything they asked me - they didn't ask but the realization stayed.
Quote by EllenJames
A bit evolutionary actually - working in theatre in college around gays opened my mind up but it was really only a few years ago that I began to admit it to myself, first with fantasies of a mmf three way with my wife - but it really hit me when I looked up one day in a museum and saw a pair of young men together - and realized that I would happily have done almost anything they asked me - they didn't ask but the realization stayed.


It's a powerful moment, isn't it. All those taboos just evaporate and curiosity turns to arousal.
Slow process of discovering what I liked. Had a TV blow while I was overseas without "really" knowing. I knew but was so horny after 4 months at sea I didn't care. Have this pure fantasy of meeting a TV/TS/CD out and being surprised by her when we get somewhere. My wife has used a strap on with me but doesn't care for toys or play. So I wander in denial and curiousity
I didn't have any bi interests in woman till after I got married, I always noticed a beautiful woman and would comment her on it, but one day my husband asked me if I would ever have sex with a woman and I just shrugged it off.. but as I started to look at woman in a sexual way it was like a electric shock went through me and I started to realize that I was attracted to woman so after a few months I asked my hb to take me to a strip club and I loved it, then that lead to my first kiss with a woman. but there is one thing that a lot of woman don't either believe or understand and I swear it to be true, I have a great sex life with my hb and I want him to be involved when I'm with a woman and this is my rule not his you see I get so turned on when a woman touches him but in the same sense I'm the jealous type but not when we are with a woman. we have no problem attracting woman we just have a great marriage and we are best friends.
I don't know if i will ever act on it but i do have a deep desire to be with a man. I have only been with women but recently I have really explored the idea and am not afraid of my bisexual thoughts.
I started to realize it some time before I started college but haven't acted on it outside of the internet. One night I got to talking with one person I used to talk with. Ended up starting to flirt back when he started and actually got turned on. At that point, I wasn't exactly experienced (only dated girls at that time) and well... I realized I got hooked into it. I will admit there are so many things I do want to try with a guy if the moment ever does happen though.
I think I'm uncommon in the fact that I've had some male-on-male play before I came to the realization I might be bisexual. It was once when I was 16 (he was 18), and it was just us spending a night nude and masturbating to scrambled porn. It never happened again, and to this day, he is vehemently anti-gay.

After my ex-girlfriend and I separated, and I went back to my hometown, I tried to reconnect with some other nudists, and joined a nudist forum. After I'd been on for a while, I started getting PM'd from a couple of people. One of them, who was a guy, eventually started chatting me up through my now-defunct account. We kept cybering for a while; eventually, we lost contact.

More recently, I started surfing for porn, and came across a number of bisexual and gay blogs. I started realizing that I had some days that I masturbated only to guys, and began playing around with ass play. I'd like to expand into full sex with guys to see how I react to it, but I believe I'd enjoy it.
This is fascinating. The standard belief is that people seem to know long before they ever act on it. It seems I'm not the only one who learned a taste for same sex due to opportunity and experimentation.
Hey, what can I say. I had quite a few bi/gay/lesbian friends and the curiosity was always there, so a friendly Q & A became a day of same sex experimentation. Not gonna lie. . .it felt good, but the craving for pussy outweighed the craving for dick.
I suppose I have always been fascinated with the human form, male and female often looking at guys in the showers at my local gym etc and after I received strap-on sex from a female friend of mine, and really enjoyed it, I started to wonder what it would be like with a guy, my curiosity got the better of me soon after and I have never looked back, sucking a guy for the first time seemed strange but I soon got over that and now love to get my lips around a hard cock
I think I've said this in another thread, but for me it came about as a result of dreams and fantasies I had. Erotic dreams about men that I had occasionally would leave me very aroused, even turn into wet dreams. Afterwards, I would be rather uncomfortable with that arousal but would keep thinking about it, too. I've also found a growing fascination with the penis and the idea of touching and tasting another man's penis. Hasn't happened yet, but it's definitely become a part of my sexual makeup.
My first meeting with a swinging couple. He loved to suck and it was only fair to reciprocate.
For me I have always liked women when I use to play sports always tried my hardest to still watch or look in the locker room but not get caught
I actually developed a crush on a history teacher. That was also around the time a lot of my friends had boyfriends. I think i had an epiphany in the shower(i do my best thinking in there) when i realized i'm always checking out girls instead of guys.
I simultaneously evolved a fascination for the both male and female bodies. I realized that the nervous almost electrical tingle of excitement I felt going through my mind and body when being stared at or hit on by a guy I thought was hot was the same feeling I got when I checked out and admired some women’s bodies.

It was a desire I had but I didn’t act on it because it’s not in my nature to make the first move. So I drifted along dreaming and fantasising about me being seduced by a slightly older, very attractive and experienced woman. Fortunately my dream came true.

I still get the same tingles
For me it was a 2 step process. When I was a teenager a group of friends started masturbating in front of each other. One of the guys and I were at his house one day and started to look at some Playboys. We started masturbating again, but this time we agreed to suck each other off. I went first and took his hard cock in my mouth .. it was an incredible experience. I don't think he came in my mouth. He chickened out and didn't suck me. A few days later we were playing again and he ended up letting me cum on his ass. After this episode we both kind of got weirded and never repeated it.

This memory stayed dormant until a few years ago when I started to expose myself on ... most of the viewers were guys. I started to remember my earlier experiences and started to enjoy it more and more. I was not only showing but also watching and getting very turned on by it, One day a dude asked me to wear some of my wife's lingerie. I was unable to, for I'm quite larger than she is, but the seed was planted. One day I was traveling and decided to buy some panties .After that I was hooked and now I enjoy wearing lingerie when either me or my wife are traveling and I'm by myself.

My wife would not understand/accept my bi tendencies so I will not act out on them while we are married - and I hope to never act them out. They are a nice fantasy but not worth ruining my marriage.
I was steered in the direction by someone a lot older but had deep thoughts that same sex. It was something that I wanted and soon found that it was something that would be a regular part of my life.
it happened 5 years ago, the desire for same sex has started deep within me cuz of my best friend... now my wife
I don't really remember when or how I discovered it. It started about the same age that I got interested in guys, a little later i guess.
I just loved to watch the female forms.
To me it never have been a , or anything like that, it felt normal and still feels normal to me.

I NEVER forget the day I told my mother about it, it was in my teenage years.
We were having dinner and I told her I have been kissing with a girl and that I liked it so much.
Hahaha, the look on her face was priceless. (my mother is really prude and says she doesn't like sex...pfff)
All she could say was:
"YOU?! I can't believe it, EEEW, you can not be interested in both genders....that's like you want to have it ALL."

Well Mum, thats correct

After that unbelievable narrowminded reaction I never talked about it with her anymore, that is like 20 years ago I think.
Quote by Milik_The_Red
Please note, this is not a question of when or how old, rather it is a question of how you approached your desire. Did you feel you were breaking a ? We're you reluctant at first, or was it something that you already knew would fill a need?

For me, it was unexpected. I didn't consider myself gay and I had relations with women on several occasions before I first tried it with a man. I was more or less seduced into it and felt both fear and excitment as I realized I was going to go through with it.

Afterward, I was shocked at myself. I felt not a small amount of shame as well, but within a few days I was back for more. I saw him for a couple of weeks and before long I had embraced the act. I still prefer women for the most part, but gay sex has a feel unto itself and I am glad I allowed myself to indulge in it.

Edit: in respect to site rules, I remind any who would like to respond that any references to underage sexual activity is strictly prohibited.


It just felt natural and perfectly normal to admire both male and female. When my body started producing urges of a sexual nature , I saw nothing wrong with enjoying both. It wasn't something that I pushed myself towards or wanted to be , for me personally I would say that it is inherent.
Those hidden desires were there throughout my life and I didn't ever think I would act on them. As I aged I thought more and more about the possibilities of being with another man to see if those feelings would return. It started with a blowjob (receiving here and there) and eventually reciprocating. I loved the feel of a man's penis in my mouth and would seek one on one more often only for oral sex. Eventually I tried anal sex when I was 23 with someone with a 10" cock and it was simply amazing. It was a wake up call for me. Now as I have progressed later in life, I haven't had same sex liasons. The female body is so hot and so attractive. But if the right guy did come along maybe I'll give it another shot.....
For me, it was when I was at college. I had been hanging around with one of the girls on my course and we'd had quite a few drinks together. We'd been flirting outrageously for weeks at each other and we ended up in bed.

Needless to say, after we'd had sex a few times, she asked me outright if I was interested in men. She had her hand on my cock at the time and lying wasn't an option! I admitted to a couple of experiences, nothing heavy, just touching.

She kinda knew already but wanted to be sure, she found it a real turn-on so we used to go out to find another to join us and that's how it started. She'd 'experimented' too with girls and over those remaining couple of years at Uni, we'd got quite involved in the Manchester swinging scene.

Sadly, she left Uni and needed to further her education with a Masters, I moved South to take up a job.

I still think of her a lot as she kinda 'broke me in', I am bisexual now and probably 60:40 in terms of my predilection preferring to shack up with a woman but have a hankering for men.
The first time was when I was fucking my wife and she was sucking my friends cock, I was pretty hot and wanted to kiss her while she was sucking cock, when she went to kiss me back his cock slid into my mouth and boy did it taste good, so I continued to suck him until she took it back, A couple times when she went to sleep, I started jacking him off and he would push my head down on his cock and I would suck him off. Now I have another friend who we get together with from craigs list. First time we got together he took all of his clothes off, and when I saw his hard on I went right down on his cock, We suck each other off and play around not often enough.
I had already had other guys suck my cock, but I never tried it. I was on an assignment in Erie PA and at the motel I was staying at I met a couple that took me out for drinks and country music. When we got back in their car they had me sitting in the front sandwich between the two of them. Even though I was a little drunk, I could feel the wife running her hand up and down my leg, and her husband was massaging my crotch.

We got back to my room and they shed their clothes and so did I. That was the first time I ever sucked another man's cock. I enjoyed it. I LOVED IT. I was probably about 40 years old at the time, and wondered why I missed all the fun by not doing this sooner. They both take turns on me and I had the time of my life. Our relationship lasted about two months, then I was called back to Philadelphia and never saw or heard from them again.
I had a hungry ass for a long time, but never found myself attracted to men. I've always prefered the company of women and was lucky enough to have ladies who enjoyed strap on play. After what started as joking, evolving to blunt conversation over a matter of years, one night I slept with my best friend. I still struggle with the term Bi because I don't desire men in the same way. I don't talk to a guy and get turned on by his hair, eyes, nose or chest anything like what happens when I meet a woman. It's more purely sexual. Not sure how common this is for bi guys, but for me it's a whole different thang.
Quote by Milik_The_Red
This is fascinating. The standard belief is that people seem to know long before they ever act on it. It seems I'm not the only one who learned a taste for same sex due to opportunity and experimentation.

I always knew, perhaps it's different for gay people.
I had sex with girls but I always knew that I was gay.
Quote by Milik_The_Red
This is fascinating. The standard belief is that people seem to know long before they ever act on it. It seems I'm not the only one who learned a taste for same sex due to opportunity and experimentation.

I always knew, perhaps it's different for gay people.
I had sex with girls but I always knew that I was gay.
I remember being attracted to men when I was 18 yo, but suppressed any sexual thought s, as it was just not right to think like that back in the 70's. I was always looking at men, in change rooms, at sports events etc. I unfortunately didn't act until after I married my wife, which has complicated things as you can imagine. It was at around the age of 30 that I talked her into a threesome with another guy, which by the way turned into a twosome between he and I, that was the turning point for me. I'm 57 now and still love sucking cock, would do it every day if I could. I would say I'm probable 80% m 20% f in my desires, but I think it is more a supply and demand thing! it's easier to find bi or gay men to have sex with.