This is a serious and meaningful post that everyone should read. I applaud Sprite 's courageousness and strength of spirit for bringing this to out attention.
Rachel,
You're an incredible woman and this outpouring of honesty shows that even more. If this helps but one person you've done an amazing job I (and most) would only hope to do. Congratulations on your honesty, it takes a very courageous person to share such things.
Hugs to you my friend!
Wow. I know this was hard for you Rachel. I battled depression for many years and just when I think I'm passed it, it makes another appearance just to remind me it's still deep inside. I know many others who deal with this shit weekly and my heart goes out to them. You are so right, listening is key. We don't need oppinions - a caring, listening ear is help enough.
May your courage start a trend around here. This is important enough that it should be flagged so it can be easily found.
Thank you so much for opening your heart. Hugs.
I'm glad Nicola encouraged you to share this beyond the mod thread, Rachel. I've been seeing this project around a lot lately, and I'm hoping it endures, and doesn't simply become a fad, like the ALS icebucket challenge. It's a very worthy endeavor, faith-based or not, and it has the potential to help a lot of people who are in a similar state of mind (and there are a lot of them, especially in this age of increased bullying in schools and online!).
Thanks for your bravery and openness, as well. Maybe it will encourage others to open up and seek a listening ear when they really need it. The alternative can result in the unfortunate finality of a period.
Rachel,
BTW your injection of humor when tensions run high is a true gift. Thank you.
Chuck
wow... all of the courage displayed here ASTOUNDS me. like those of you who posted, sprite, chicamala and poppet to be specific, i too fight a daily battle with anxiety and depression. this past year and a half has been the most traumatic. very recently i found the strength to open up to my closest friends about it. opening up to them was emotionally exhausting, but very well worth it. i don't know how you have managed to bare your souls here...
i know how it feels to long for the person you used to be and dread what the future holds. i've learned to take things one day at a time; it's all i can do. SO often i've felt as though my story has ended, that the next chapter is far too ahead. but i WON'T let it end here -i can't. there's TOO much living to do. thank you for reminding me that there are others who share my struggle. because of this post i've found a new symbol of strength -the semicolon. who knew?! inspiration can TRULY be found anywhere.
nia?
I posted the below on another thread but thought it would be appropriate for here as well. I hadn't heard of the semi-colon project, but I am glad I have been made aware of it now.
I can relate to most of the previous posts. I've been battling these issues since I was 5. Back then they just didn't have a name for it and doctors didn't think children could be depressed, much less bi-polar. Things have come a long way and I am grateful that my children don't have as much as a struggle as I did. It still is a daily battle but at least there are medications and awareness now that I did not have.
I was planning another tattoo and am now thinking that might just be the perfect one to get. Thank you to everyone, especially Sprite for all the information and it really is good to know we are not alone and someone is there to just listen.
"I hate it when people say we are brave as well. We aren't, it's just a fact of life. We have to deal with it. The alternative being we don't and I do have experience in attempting to choose that route as well. The only thing I can add is as that as I have gotten older things have gotten better. You learn to recognize signs and symptoms earlier and manage them better. That's not to say it still isn't a struggle some days. Having someone just listen often can make the difference in a bad day turning into a disastrous one. So if you want to know what to do for someone who is suffering from any kind of mental or mood disorder, just be a friend and lend them an ear or a shoulder to cry on if that's what they need.
The world is getting a bit better at understanding these things but there is still a certain stigma. Just don't ever add to that. Educate yourself with facts and ask questions. I know I am happy to explain to people what it's like for me. I've had to learn to be an advocate and not so much for myself, but for the two children I passed along these genes to.
Two best pieces of advice: Don't tell someone you know how they feel unless you do and have had these issues yourself.
Do just ask, "What can I do?". Often it really is as simple as being there and just listening."
Gill
I am glad my fab friend commented here or I may have never seen this post. I spent over 25 years with depression, anxiety, insomnia....ugh, too many "diagnosis", so many prescriptions that never worked, self medicated, and 11 years ago it stopped. I'm not going to go into any more of my details here, but am here (too much-lol) for anyone who wants or needs to chat.
Thank you Rachel for this thread. It is courageous and important.
Thank you, Sprite, for this gift of a thread.
The stories collecting here show such courage and strength and honesty. Some of you I know, and some of you in turn know my own story and struggles. But to everyone who had the courage to share their stories here, I give you my heart. Trudging through loss and pain and hopelessness, following the dim path toward hope and belief and renewal and redemption.
We are here to carry each other. This project is such a lovely example of the simple everyday bravery it sometimes takes to be alive, and to keep our lives alight.
;
Rach,
As someone who has gotten to know you over the past two plus years, I know how much it took for you to share this not only with the mods... but with the rest of Lush as well. I've always admired you for your courage, and I've told you so. Now... I'm telling everyone.
As someone who knows you, and the source of your PTSD (well... one of them... I won't even presume to know all the causes), I know how easy it is to just throw in the towel and say "FUCK IT!" I know the feeling of fear gripping your soul, choking you off, and making you think you can't go on (I experienced that earlier this year.) It was your strength and friendship that helped me get though that shit.
I've seen the posts on Facebook about Project Semi Colon and I know for you to make this as public as you did too courage. More courage than you probably thought you had. Thank you for sharing this with us. Your courage and strength still impresses me beyond words.
May peace & love fill you life & future.
~Nymph
I know when I meet some one and they ask ,"what are your hobbies" and my answer is always the same" My computer" why .. because I to suffer with this ..I have had PTSD for a long time, but seems to get worse instead of better.. I have come to the point over the last 2 years if I don't HAVE to go out of my house I DON"T. I am much more comfortable here in my room by my self. I don't like being around people any more. When I do go out it is to one place, To get my hair done, and I can go there only because there is 2 ppl that work there ,they both know my problem and I get in when no one else is there. My family doesn't under stand and gets upset because I wont go out. Then if you do decide and try to explain, they aren't really listening because they tell you, just make your self,. There is NO making yourself. I have tried many different meds. talking to head Drs. ,But what works best for me is to be home in my "Safe zone". I know life will never be the same for me again. I am learning to deal with the life I have now,the isolation. But it is much better than going out and going into a panic attack. With out this thread I would have never told anyone about this. But when ppl ask you what you do alll day ,they just don't understand,So you say why bother to try and explain. I find myself even here staying to myself. Hiding behind a screen is much easier..... Simplicity xo