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BDSM without a safe word

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Quote by Twisted_Skald


Well now I have issues with that.
Firstly, if you can't remember red but you can remember "Pineapple" damn well shout "Pineapple!" and keep shouting it.
Safe words are there for a reason, you can never have enough of them.

As for not reading your body language that's a straight up fail for me. A dominant has to read your body language, and stop regularly to check you're ok. If they don't they're just a selfish jerk and don't deserve your submission.

Your Dominant has a duty to protect you and themselves, if they forget that duty they either need to retrain to remember it or stop playing with you until they get their shit together.

You as a submissive have a duty to yourself too, I know sub space is seductive and I know it can be really hard to be the one who stops play. But come on girl, always back yourself. This is your body we're talking about, roles be damned. Scream every word you can think of apart from Green and things always come to a stop. When I was a submissive I knew that anything that was done to me, I had to fully consent to it. Before, during and after the event. Anything less was just abuse. So I made damn sure the Dominant knew my limits, and knew when I wanted them to slow the fuck down.
I'd use a yellow at the half way point to make them check in with me to make sure they knew I wasn't a piece of furniture.

I can be rough when I need to be, but not when my play partner isn't getting at least as much out of it as I am.
I've stopped well before the subs limit because I didn't feel they were enjoying it enough.
As a Dominant I have to respect my subs free choice, but I also have to know when to trust my instincts that they're just trying to please me and aren't really enjoying play.

I'd say there's room for you both to improve. Never surrender your safe words girl and make sure the Dominant heeds them.
If they don't, play stops and if it doesn't stop right away, report them.
I know I did in my past, some people never take RED nicely.


100% agree.

I have always been concerned about this issue when it came to this area. My husband and I practice a lot, but I am very afraid of something that may prevent me from saying that it hurts or is scary, and he will not understand it and stop. Guys from https://www.bdsmchat.co advised me, as well as a signal, to make a few taps on the nearest surface in case my husband could not hear me. But another question is, what if I'm bound and can't knock on anything? All this is somehow difficult, and so far, I do not understand how to do it correctly and safely

Quote by phyllidaverdiguel70

I have always been concerned about this issue when it came to this area. My husband and I practice a lot, but I am very afraid of something that may prevent me from saying that it hurts or is scary, and he will not understand it and stop. Guys from https://www.bdsmchat.co advised me, as well as a signal, to make a few taps on the nearest surface in case my husband could not hear me. But another question is, what if I'm bound and can't knock on anything? All this is somehow difficult, and so far, I do not understand how to do it correctly and safely

hand signals. one finger means okay. two fingers mean slow down three fingers mean stop. or something similar. also, if you're not able to do any of those, as a responsible Dom, he should pause and make sure you're okay every time something different is introduced.

You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.