It seems everyone these days in the media are cashing in their dubious two cents worth about the book 50 Shades of Gray and dominant/submissive relationships. And most of the are displaying an ignorance and shallow comprehension of both the meaning of the book and the lifestyle and its relationships. Anchor and "journalist" newsmen seem to flub around, denying that a Christian Gray can be based on real behavior or on the other extreme wonder aloud, "Gee whillikers and boy howdy! Do women really want a dominant man to spank their butts and stuff?" While the media women smirk knowingly. Seriously, where have these people been? And what are their real social lives like?
What's your take?
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50 Shades of Ignorance
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Active Ink Slinger
There was two news articles in the Daily Mail.
Wise Ass
You may also see some replies about the same topic that LatinFoxy had posted a few weeks ago.
http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst22664_Fifty-Shades-of-Grey.aspx
http://www.lushstories.com/forum/yaf_postst22664_Fifty-Shades-of-Grey.aspx
The night that changed my life, a four part series of a married man lusting after his co-worker
[URL=http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
[URL=http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
![http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]](https://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]){kind=link}
Artistic Tart
Seems like he's asking about the patronizing, overly-titillated tone that media's treating this subject with, more so than the book itself.
Speaking from "outside" of BDSM culture, I can tell you that many of the various practices within BDSM lifestyles are eye-opening and eyebrow-raising, especially when first introduced. Please don't confuse that with judging them as "weird" or "f-d up", it's just that for those that don't respond to it- even after it's been explained to us- parts of it can be a bit bewildering. I say that as a fairly sexual person who hangs out and volunteers on a sex stories, chat, and forum site. Now, put the same subject in the hands of a mainstream news anchor or talk show host, and there's no escaping at least some degree of "oooh how exotic and naughty!" undertone to their coverage.
I can see how, besides the fact that they're not comprehending much of the subtext, it could feel condescending when discussed outside of sexual culture outlets (such as Lush).
Speaking from "outside" of BDSM culture, I can tell you that many of the various practices within BDSM lifestyles are eye-opening and eyebrow-raising, especially when first introduced. Please don't confuse that with judging them as "weird" or "f-d up", it's just that for those that don't respond to it- even after it's been explained to us- parts of it can be a bit bewildering. I say that as a fairly sexual person who hangs out and volunteers on a sex stories, chat, and forum site. Now, put the same subject in the hands of a mainstream news anchor or talk show host, and there's no escaping at least some degree of "oooh how exotic and naughty!" undertone to their coverage.
I can see how, besides the fact that they're not comprehending much of the subtext, it could feel condescending when discussed outside of sexual culture outlets (such as Lush).
Active Ink Slinger
As LadyX said, you have to also understand that theres more people that dont understand the BDSM lifestyle than they do.
Me for example i read stories here, read the forums and talk to people and i still cant completely understand why people want that lifestyle (No matter if you are a Dom or a sub), the diference is that i am used to reading about it and can understand that diferent people want diferent things in their sex life, but if you give this book to a person that know nothing or almost nothing about the lifestyle and are not open minded, its very easy for them to judge the lifestyle. In the book you have a guy that admits to want to hit a girl, if you dont understand that the girl also want to be hit its very easy to judge the situation as abuse toward woman. Even the girl in the book freaks out about it because she has no experience of it before.
If you ask me the book should be actually really good for people to understand more about the lifestyle in a good way.
Me for example i read stories here, read the forums and talk to people and i still cant completely understand why people want that lifestyle (No matter if you are a Dom or a sub), the diference is that i am used to reading about it and can understand that diferent people want diferent things in their sex life, but if you give this book to a person that know nothing or almost nothing about the lifestyle and are not open minded, its very easy for them to judge the lifestyle. In the book you have a guy that admits to want to hit a girl, if you dont understand that the girl also want to be hit its very easy to judge the situation as abuse toward woman. Even the girl in the book freaks out about it because she has no experience of it before.
If you ask me the book should be actually really good for people to understand more about the lifestyle in a good way.
Active Ink Slinger
I came across the BDSM life style by chance when I picked up the work of Marquis de Sade. Yes not all Subs/Doms are like the characters from de Sade's mind and after looking at various forms of BDSM from animal play (Horse, Kitty, Puppy) where subs are dressed and act like animals. (How cool is it that one can get a horse, rabbit or fox tail butt plug?) to the use of the rack or being tied up via Japanese bondage.
It does go to show that people who do not know the life style may form strong opinions. Like generations where people thought that being homosexual was a mental health illness and the gay person gets tossed into a mental health asylum.
Last week I saw 50 shades of Grey was on sale at my local bookstore. After picking it up and reading a few random chapters I gagged (pun not intended) at the whole "Inner Goddess", "Beautiful grey eyes", "Down there" and kind of thought how the hell did that drivel get published and made famous.
After finding out it was originally a fanficition story from the Twilight series. Changing Bella/Edward to Anastasia/Christian I could see why it was poorly written.
I think to really appreciate the lifestyle one has to witness it first hand. I know I have been to Hellfire club and seen it in action.
It does go to show that people who do not know the life style may form strong opinions. Like generations where people thought that being homosexual was a mental health illness and the gay person gets tossed into a mental health asylum.
Last week I saw 50 shades of Grey was on sale at my local bookstore. After picking it up and reading a few random chapters I gagged (pun not intended) at the whole "Inner Goddess", "Beautiful grey eyes", "Down there" and kind of thought how the hell did that drivel get published and made famous.
After finding out it was originally a fanficition story from the Twilight series. Changing Bella/Edward to Anastasia/Christian I could see why it was poorly written.
I think to really appreciate the lifestyle one has to witness it first hand. I know I have been to Hellfire club and seen it in action.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Sirene_Jaune
It does go to show that people who do not know the life style may form strong opinions. Like generations where people thought that being homosexual was a mental health illness and the gay person gets tossed into a mental health asylum.
I think to really appreciate the lifestyle one has to witness it first hand. I know I have been to Hellfire club and seen it in action.
I have to say i strongly desagree with you! Even though im not gay so i havent "witness it first hand" i completely understand it and have cero judgement about it, yes probably big part of it is because i have friends that i adore that are gay and also the fact that been gay now and days is very open and you have tons of information about it everywhere, yes we evolved and as human beings started to understand ir and not judge it, but i think big part of that change was because you have information everywhere about it its in the open, theres no more "taboos" about it.
When it comes to BDSM is not the same theres not that many information out there unless you are looking for it, its still a big and people dont go around saying im in a BDSM relationship! Im not saying it cant evolve also into something everyone get use to it, but i dont think for that to happen we all need to experience it first hand, you just need to get more information out there, and in my opinion wether you liked the writting on this book or not, i think its actually good to the BDSM community because its getting people that knew nothing about it to get interested about knowing more, getting more information and even talking about it.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by latinfoxy
I have to say i strongly desagree with you! Even though im not gay so i havent "witness it first hand" i completely understand it and have cero judgement about it, yes probably big part of it is because i have friends that i adore that are gay and also the fact that been gay now and days is very open and you have tons of information about it everywhere, yes we evolved and as human beings started to understand ir and not judge it, but i think big part of that change was because you have information everywhere about it its in the open, theres no more "taboos" about it.
I was saying back in the early 20th century people were still being prosecuted for being gay or having tendancies which are . I was using the gay lifestyle as an example of how such different lifestyles are now being exposed.
Active Ink Slinger
50 shades triology may have "sparked" interest currently into the BDSM world. However it's not new in the media.
Music/Music videos
*Rihanna's S&M song/video
As listed:
Music/Music videos
*Rihanna's S&M song/video
Active Ink Slinger
*t.A.T.u "Ludi Invaldi (People disabled)"
Though this video also shows different types of .
Though this video also shows different types of .
Active Ink Slinger
Madonna's Erotica
In the song "Dirty Talk" by Wynter Gordon she sings "S & M on the floor, I like it hardcore"
In the song "Dirty Talk" by Wynter Gordon she sings "S & M on the floor, I like it hardcore"
Active Ink Slinger
Let's not forget cult figure Bettie Page and her work in BDSM.
Active Ink Slinger
I never said BDSM was never on the news before, what im saying is that now its getting to more places than before, i can assure you that most woman on the age above 40 have no idea who Rhianna is or tatu and probably saw Madonna´s video and thought well thats Madonna for you and didnt give it a second thought. Even i have no idea who Bettie Page is.
My point again is you cant expect people that have very little information about the BDSM lifestyle to be all warm and open arms, when the fact is some of the aspects of that lifestyle are shocking too people that dont understand it or share the same point of view!! At least now is been discuss and not in a hush dont let anyone hear you, but in a more open way. Those it have a great response from everyone? of course not, but i can garanty that it have had a good inpact in some people that knew nothing about it before.
Is it a good book? Depends wether you like that kind of writting or not.
Does it represent the true BDSM lifestyle? i wasnt sure and thats why i did a lot of questions on the other thread and by the answers some people gave me, i think it does in a romantic novel kind of way.
My point again is you cant expect people that have very little information about the BDSM lifestyle to be all warm and open arms, when the fact is some of the aspects of that lifestyle are shocking too people that dont understand it or share the same point of view!! At least now is been discuss and not in a hush dont let anyone hear you, but in a more open way. Those it have a great response from everyone? of course not, but i can garanty that it have had a good inpact in some people that knew nothing about it before.
Is it a good book? Depends wether you like that kind of writting or not.
Does it represent the true BDSM lifestyle? i wasnt sure and thats why i did a lot of questions on the other thread and by the answers some people gave me, i think it does in a romantic novel kind of way.
Empress of the Moon
Quote by WmCutterBlack
Seriously, where have these people been? And what are their real social lives like?
What's your take?
Most of the people I know who are into BDSM are members of a munch. Most of the socializing that I do, along with my boyfriend, is with friends from our munch, and friends we have met because of the munch we belong to. Some people go to clubs to meet people I suppose, but I have only been to BDSM clubs with groups. We're not spending all of our time tying each other up and giving each other whippings, our real social lives are pretty much like everyone else's. We get together with friends, we go to parties, we go clubbing, we have cookouts and BBQs. (In the south we know the difference in cookouts and BBQ.)
Yes, some women love having their butts spanked. I for one. I am not alone.
[url]http://[/url]
Clumeleon
Quote by Sirene_Jaune
There was two news articles in the Daily Mail.
I like how much this statement says.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by CoopsRuthie
Most of the people I know who are into BDSM are members of a munch. Most of the socializing that I do, along with my boyfriend, is with friends from our munch, and friends we have met because of the munch we belong to. Some people go to clubs to meet people I suppose, but I have only been to BDSM clubs with groups. We're not spending all of our time tying each other up and giving each other whippings, our real social lives are pretty much like everyone else's. We get together with friends, we go to parties, we go clubbing, we have cookouts and BBQs. (In the south we know the difference in cookouts and BBQ.)
Yes, some women love having their butts spanked. I for one. I am not alone.
Nice work Ruthie
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by latinfoxy
I never said BDSM was never on the news before, what im saying is that now its getting to more places than before, i can assure you that most woman on the age above 40 have no idea who Rhianna is or tatu and probably saw Madonna´s video and thought well thats Madonna for you and didnt give it a second thought. Even i have no idea who Bettie Page is.
My point again is you cant expect people that have very little information about the BDSM lifestyle to be all warm and open arms, when the fact is some of the aspects of that lifestyle are shocking too people that dont understand it or share the same point of view!! At least now is been discuss and not in a hush dont let anyone hear you, but in a more open way. Those it have a great response from everyone? of course not, but i can garanty that it have had a good inpact in some people that knew nothing about it before.
Is it a good book? Depends wether you like that kind of writting or not.
Does it represent the true BDSM lifestyle? i wasnt sure and thats why i did a lot of questions on the other thread and by the answers some people gave me, i think it does in a romantic novel kind of way.
Seriously you dont know who Bettie Page is damn thanks for making me feel ancient lol
Active Ink Slinger
For me, and you can see my signature for further opinion. I was not so much turned off by the trilogy as I was concerned for the people that are going to read it and think they are ready to dive into this lifestyle with this series as their guide. The fact still remains that this series over simplifies what is not a simple thing.
This community is as varied sociologically as any other community. From people who live a 24/7 Master and Slave relationship to those that dabble in bed room swings and "different positions".
The fact remains that if you have read this and had feelings of "Yeah, I like that, this is for me." Now you have another step to take and that is learning about the lifestyle and how to be safe in living it.
This community is as varied sociologically as any other community. From people who live a 24/7 Master and Slave relationship to those that dabble in bed room swings and "different positions".
The fact remains that if you have read this and had feelings of "Yeah, I like that, this is for me." Now you have another step to take and that is learning about the lifestyle and how to be safe in living it.
If you have read 50 Shades of Gray and think that you are ready to be a dom or a sub. Then you have a lot to learn.
Follow my slave's blog slave skye's real life blog if we can get 100 followers she is going to start posting pictures!!! I know there are at least 100 of you that want to see that click the link enter your email and follow. We hit 100 then she has said she will post a picture of herself.
Follow my slave's blog slave skye's real life blog if we can get 100 followers she is going to start posting pictures!!! I know there are at least 100 of you that want to see that click the link enter your email and follow. We hit 100 then she has said she will post a picture of herself.