OK, maybe it's just me, but why does it seem that all guys want a wild, wanton, woman that is down for naughty adventures and experimentation and that gets horny at the drop of a hat but then get all insecure, possessive, and jealous when they find one?
My mother always said that it was a case of "be careful what you wish for," but it seems to mostly be a theme in not only my life, but in the lives of my friends as well. My FWB says it as, "women are like motorcycles, we all want the ones that will kill us." Men all say they want an untamed and unrestrained woman, but after they've tasted it they always want us to calm down and behave! what am I missing?
Am I a good witch, or a bad witch? History will decide
I see guys do this too and don't understand it. Example: falling for a sexy flirty bartender or stripper, than want them to quit. So many men are insecure when it comes down to it. I think it's more about the idea of having a wild woman,, but when it comes down to it they can't handle it and get possessive. I've always lived by " worry about the things you can control in life" if a woman/man wants to cheat they will weather they are wild or "shy". I've tried for many years to get my wife to be wild out in the open, but she is worried about image and being judged.
Its because guys lie to you and to themselves. Bearing in mind this is a bit stereotypical and thankfully there are exceptions. Guys SAY that they want a wild girl because they want to get laid, think it will be great and are picturing porn circus sex. They have absolutely zero intention of being in a long term relationship or marriage with a wild girl; they want to marry a girl like their Mom, consciously or subconsciously. So if Mom is short and feisty then they will likely marry a girl who is short and feisty. Now complicate that with the male brain who has imprinted an impression of the ideal woman (i.e. his Mom) on his brain. He most likely has some fucked up version of his mother that includes a certain whore-madonna complex. Bottom line: he wants a 'nice girl' to bring home to show his Mom.
Remember that feeling you had when as a kid you suddenly realized YOUR PARENTS WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME FUCKING HOUSE WHERE YOU LIVED?!!!! That's the feeling a guy gets when his brain tells him the wild girl will be just fine as soon as he makes a few changes/improvements to make her more 'presentable'. Yeah, it's fucked up.
I'll fess up. I've been that guy.
She was so insanely sexy and charismatic I couldn't say no. I wanted her to be monogamous, and I think she tried, but she she just wasn't built that way. In retrospect I should have just let her be free, and enjoy her for who she was, and the relationship for what it was. I tried to control her, and ended up being that jealous and insecure guy you're talking about.
Openly sexy women are powerful. When you're young and stupid, you sometimes make the mistake of pretending you have any control at all. Or need to have any control at all.
Those guys don't know what they're missing. I'm married to a wild woman and it's a thrill. I never get jealous, even when men have been chatting her up all night. I know she loves me. You have to have complete faith in your wife, And with a wild woman you have to take a leap of faith. You have to know that no matter what she does, she loves you.
Those guys don't know what they're missing. I'm married to a wild woman and it's a thrill. I never get jealous, even when men have been chatting her up all night. I know she loves me. You have to have complete faith in your wife, And with a wild woman you have to take a leap of faith. You have to know that no matter what she does, she loves you.
with only the intent to help, i disagree that most men want a wild woman (because it requires extra effort, imho)
they actually want to be perceived/received as the GUY who CLAIMED/EARNED the wild woman's ...
a) attention;
b) attraction;
c) public declaration...
the partners who get jealous and insecure will only get MORE jealous and MORE insecure, because they are in the middle of their fear of "what others will or might think."
a lover who wants YOU for YOU is for keeps. even if it doesn't work out, you both keep on, for keeps. when your lover hasn't really wanted YOU, per se, then when it ends it doesn't keep well, at all.
I think its because they feel they could be replaced. They become insecure in their masculinity instead of building that emotional bond that no other man could break.... youre right, be careful what you wish for...
characterized by intense feeling; passionate; fervent
Intensely devoted, eager, or enthusiastic; zealous
vehement; fierce burning, fiery, or hot
