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Why is it....?
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Active Ink Slinger
The way my lesbian friends tell me is it is due to the disrespect from men.
Many women became lesbians due to mistreatment by guys so there is a natural hatred.
Others tell me that they hate how some guys think they are gods gift to women and think a fuck with them will change them back to hetero...
Kisses!
Steph
Many women became lesbians due to mistreatment by guys so there is a natural hatred.
Others tell me that they hate how some guys think they are gods gift to women and think a fuck with them will change them back to hetero...
Kisses!
Steph
Quote by 1Zratedgal
The way my lesbian friends tell me is it is due to the disrespect from men.
Many women became lesbians due to mistreatment by guys so there is a natural hatred.
I disagree .... I don't believe that lesbians are lesbians by choice and/or that because some men are disrespectful to a woman, that the woman now identifies with being a lesbian.
I know of many lesbians who are friends with men ... it's dependent on the people involved.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by CrossOfStAndrew
That many women get along with gay men, but lesbians and straight men often are like oil and water together?
Really? My wife's best friend is les and I get along with her pretty well. One of my sister-in-laws is lesbian, too, and I have no problem dealing with her. Just be respectful and I haven't noticed any issues.
Welcome to visit my tumblr page at http://HK4167.tumblr.com for erotic arts. Or http://slice-of-moment.tumblr.com for non-erotic arts.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Yahtzee
I disagree .... I don't believe that lesbians are lesbians by choice and/or that because some men are disrespectful to a woman, that the woman now identifies with being a lesbian.
I know of many lesbians who are friends with men ... it's dependent on the people involved.
I agree with what you stated Yahtzee, but for the original question on why those relationships are strained, this is something I have been told by many lesbians. I know it doesn't apply to all, but there is a quantity of them that have been developed in that manner.
I DO have many lesbian or gay friends and they don't have a problem with opposite sexes.
Kisses!
Steph
Wise Ass
Quote by 1Zratedgal
The way my lesbian friends tell me is it is due to the disrespect from men.
Many women became lesbians due to mistreatment by guys so there is a natural hatred.
Others tell me that they hate how some guys think they are gods gift to women and think a fuck with them will change them back to hetero...
Kisses!
Steph
Really? So Women in your circles have "become" Lesbians due to mistreatmennt by guys...That goes against everything I have ever known...I thought it was in our DNA, what the hell do I know!?
Kisses!
Dude
The night that changed my life, a four part series of a married man lusting after his co-worker
[URL=http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
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![http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]](https://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]){kind=link}
Alpha Blonde
Quote by Dudealicious
Really? So Women in your circles have "become" Lesbians due to mistreatmennt by guys...That goes against everything I have ever known...I thought it was in out DNA, what the hell do I know!?
Kisses!
Dude
I don't think it's that these girls "become" Lesbians because of men. I just think it's a bisexual girl that ends up turning to a full-time relationship with a woman and thereby technically identifying herself as a 'lesbian' in the community just based on outward appearances.
I had a friend like this that decided she only wanted to be with a woman after a traumatic experience with a man. She had a girlfriend for a for a few years. But then she went back to guys and got married last year.
I think if you're bisexual, you often decide to identify as lesbian or gay if your primary relationship is with a same-sex partner. But that doesn't mean it's a permanent or exclusive choice. ie. look at Anne Hecht.
Women that have chosen to never be with men and identified as lesbian from the start are (in my experience anyway) pretty 'chill' when it comes to having guy friends etc.
Wise Ass
I agree Doll, however my post was in reference to another posted here, as I hope I have referenced. Yes Men (and Women) do some terrible things, however I am never sure that swings your definitive sexuality (in my opinion)
The night that changed my life, a four part series of a married man lusting after his co-worker
[URL=http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
[URL=http://www.lushstories.com/stories/reluctance/the-night-that-changed-my-life-1.aspx][IMG]http://i.imgur.com/WPPsy.jpg[/IMG][/URL]
Alpha Blonde
Quote by Dudealicious
I agree Doll, however my post was in reference to another posted here, as I hope I have referenced. Yes Men (and Women) do some terrible things, however I am never sure that swings your definitive sexuality (in my opinion)
Yeah, I agree with what you're saying.
In the case of my friend is was a "criminally" terrible thing if you know what I mean.
I don't think you can swing definitive sexuality if you are only interested in one sex. When shit happens you just deal with it and hope for the best with the next person of that same gender.
But you can use different labels at various points in life if your sexuality is fluid and flexible from the start (ie. bisexual).
If you are technically bisexual but your committed long-term partner is of the same sex, you're probably just going to identify as gay or lesbian within certain communities. I could be wrong on that one, but that's probably what I would do if I chose to have a permanent relationship with a woman.
Active Ink Slinger
Maybe this is why men should stay in the "ask the men" section Dudealicious?
It pissed me off also. It's like slander. I call it; Stereo typing.
I know some fukin jack ass's, some of them being women. Most men, but a mean ass women is no one to fight with. A gentleman can go to jail for that shit dude
It pissed me off also. It's like slander. I call it; Stereo typing.
I know some fukin jack ass's, some of them being women. Most men, but a mean ass women is no one to fight with. A gentleman can go to jail for that shit dude
Active Ink Slinger
I do not want to argue here but to say that women become lesbians because of guys and they can't become friend because of them or what they are, it's really simplistic. I do not understand how people could reduce the gay and lesbians question into such stereotype.
A woman is a lesbian or a man is gay because it's their sexual identity as it is asserting itself over time. This is, without going into details, because of the education, the family environment, the environment in which people grew up, life experiences, the projections of parents on their children and about the identification process of children ...actual studies do not registered this question in DNA (there are no scientific prove) by the way…and it remains a major debate in the psychologist community
I've also heard that a women could think they can change the gay in bi if she could manage to sleep with them ... we're all in the same boat. It's an ego problem I guess.
Now, I am convinced that a woman who is insulting against gay guy will never be friends with a gay male ... and vice versa ...
And for the rest I am totally agree with Dancing_Doll…
A woman is a lesbian or a man is gay because it's their sexual identity as it is asserting itself over time. This is, without going into details, because of the education, the family environment, the environment in which people grew up, life experiences, the projections of parents on their children and about the identification process of children ...actual studies do not registered this question in DNA (there are no scientific prove) by the way…and it remains a major debate in the psychologist community
I've also heard that a women could think they can change the gay in bi if she could manage to sleep with them ... we're all in the same boat. It's an ego problem I guess.
Now, I am convinced that a woman who is insulting against gay guy will never be friends with a gay male ... and vice versa ...
And for the rest I am totally agree with Dancing_Doll…
Active Ink Slinger
I agree that a woman does not turn lesbian because of a bad relationship with a man. Like DD said, because of a bad realionship with a man, they may choose to have relationships with women and call themselves lesbian but in reality they are Bi and may someday choose to be with a man again if that "special" guy comes along. I am in a relationship with a woman and it may partly be due to my past history with men and the mistrust I have in them but I still love men and thoroughly enjoy sex with men too. And I did not suddenly like women as I have been Bi my entire life.
As for why lesbians hate men, well I know a few true lesbians who have no problem with men at all but I also know a few "hardcore lesbians" who do hate men( they also have no great affection for Bi women either as they call me a traitor, LOL). I think it is due to their competitive nature to prove they are are equal or superior and do not need men to survive. Much of the hatred may also be due to how they may have been treated by either family or friends while growing up.
As for why lesbians hate men, well I know a few true lesbians who have no problem with men at all but I also know a few "hardcore lesbians" who do hate men( they also have no great affection for Bi women either as they call me a traitor, LOL). I think it is due to their competitive nature to prove they are are equal or superior and do not need men to survive. Much of the hatred may also be due to how they may have been treated by either family or friends while growing up.
Quote by CrossOfStAndrew
That many women get along with gay men, but lesbians and straight men often are like oil and water together?
After reading what a few people have written here, I think that your thoughts are mis-founded that the lesbian community and the straight men are necessarily like oil and water together.
The generalization of this question rebounded into a weird take ... but none the less insightful.
I was thinking about this statement later ... and want to remind you that "getting along" with someone is rarely because of their sexual preference. What usually dictates "getting along" with someone is their respect, manners, tolerance and openness.
Perhaps your oil and water observation is regarding a few select that you know, but I do not believe that is to be the "consensus or norm" of those your have defined.
DD, Nikki, Yatzee and Z1 all have valid points. I have friends who I know have had relationships with men and it did not go well. Now they calm to be Lesbians.
Seems like at least some of them use that term as a protection clause to keep men away. If you have had a bad experience and now that we live in a world where females lovers are more accepted. This could be good insurance for some.
I have never read in any medical or psych journal of a woman or a man making a decision suddenly to be Gay or Lesbian.
I have many Gay friends and we are comfortable together, because we similar interest and similar view of life.
Seems like at least some of them use that term as a protection clause to keep men away. If you have had a bad experience and now that we live in a world where females lovers are more accepted. This could be good insurance for some.
I have never read in any medical or psych journal of a woman or a man making a decision suddenly to be Gay or Lesbian.
I have many Gay friends and we are comfortable together, because we similar interest and similar view of life.
Active Ink Slinger
Wow...what was the original question again?
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer. ~Swami X
This is probably irrelevant.
I had a mate who went for a quite drink after work in a part of Melbourne he didn't know and when he went in he swore black and blue that is was just like being in a western. you know, like, when a cowboy goes into a rowdy saloon only to be greeted by dead silence and scowling disapproval, thing was the patrons were all very tough looking ladies and it was the mid 80s so there was a lot of leather and skin head hair cuts. The bartender gave him a look that said "I'd leave if were you". He decided to take his drinking business elsewhere, he was too frightened.
Us poor hetro guys really do cop it, even these days. gay men seem to be able to have a friendly almost matey relationship with women, but hetro men that are too friendly are considered to be either sleaze bags or puppy dogs. Oh and the above is an example of what lesbian women think of us.
I have my own example: My Wife once introduced me to a friend of hers at a function put on by her old workplace. My Wife had told me prior that she thought this friend might be Gay. I said OK, tah for the heads up. When I met this friend she was aloof and dismissive of me and almost totally snubbed me the whole night but showered my wife with flirtation so obvious it was just laughable.
Hmm I wasn't going to offer an answer, but i think my tiny brain may have just put one together, read on:
S'pose it MIGHT be some of that Darwinism related type shit. There has to be some natural conflict/tension associated with two humans of child bearing age when choosing a mate. If hetrosexual men and woman all got along famously there'd TOO much sex going on. So making getting along a little harder maybe puts some sort of checks and balances on us homosapians that the animal kingdom does not have, i mean lions fuck whoever they like. Doesn't always work though, there are some men and women who will literally fuck anyone of the opposite sex....even if they dislike them....lol.
I had a mate who went for a quite drink after work in a part of Melbourne he didn't know and when he went in he swore black and blue that is was just like being in a western. you know, like, when a cowboy goes into a rowdy saloon only to be greeted by dead silence and scowling disapproval, thing was the patrons were all very tough looking ladies and it was the mid 80s so there was a lot of leather and skin head hair cuts. The bartender gave him a look that said "I'd leave if were you". He decided to take his drinking business elsewhere, he was too frightened.
Us poor hetro guys really do cop it, even these days. gay men seem to be able to have a friendly almost matey relationship with women, but hetro men that are too friendly are considered to be either sleaze bags or puppy dogs. Oh and the above is an example of what lesbian women think of us.
I have my own example: My Wife once introduced me to a friend of hers at a function put on by her old workplace. My Wife had told me prior that she thought this friend might be Gay. I said OK, tah for the heads up. When I met this friend she was aloof and dismissive of me and almost totally snubbed me the whole night but showered my wife with flirtation so obvious it was just laughable.
Hmm I wasn't going to offer an answer, but i think my tiny brain may have just put one together, read on:
S'pose it MIGHT be some of that Darwinism related type shit. There has to be some natural conflict/tension associated with two humans of child bearing age when choosing a mate. If hetrosexual men and woman all got along famously there'd TOO much sex going on. So making getting along a little harder maybe puts some sort of checks and balances on us homosapians that the animal kingdom does not have, i mean lions fuck whoever they like. Doesn't always work though, there are some men and women who will literally fuck anyone of the opposite sex....even if they dislike them....lol.
Active Ink Slinger
About the original question, maybe it's just my personal experience. I know two lesbian couple and one gay couple in RL, and never found they treat me mean or anything. In fact I know one of the girls above only became lesbian after she divorced with her ex-husband. But still I don't feel any hostile gesture from her when we all hang out, even I'm a straight man.
But again for me getting along with someone or not does not depends their sexuality, it depends on their personality.
But again for me getting along with someone or not does not depends their sexuality, it depends on their personality.
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