Don't be afraid to *tell* her what your desires and fantasies are or ask her about hers. No one is a mind reader.
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Although you think you can withstand a sub par physical chemistry because emotional intimacy is what you value... sex isn't as meaningless as it seems all those years later.
I would tell the younger me to wait til ready (which I did) but to make sure it is with someone that does truly care about you (he did then). The one thing I regret now is having had only one man, EVER! Should have dated more and waited to get married a few years.
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Quote by oceanrunner Don't be afraid to *tell* her what your desires and fantasies are or ask her about hers. No one is a mind reader.
I was going to say to me, "Use your mouth more!" Which is an attempt at a smart-arsed way to say, "Talk about sex more." Because, as you say, expecting anyone (including yourself) to read minds is asking for trouble.
Oh, and if you want to have sex with someone, it is allowed to ask them (respectfully). If the answer is "no", then that means "no" and it might be a little awkward for a bit, but don't assume that that will be the answer without asking the question. Because that might mean an awful lot of wondering "what if?"...
I was brought up with many adults telling em that sex was for me and my "true love" the man that I was going to marry and make mini's with. Im a pansexual and that mindset really fucked me up. If I could tell 15 year old me anything, its that you are ok, your feelings are normal, and sex is for you and someone you care about regardless if they will be with you forever. As long as it feels right and you take appropriate safety precautions go right ahead.
I would tell younger me to be more honest and open ablut what I like and not be ashamed. Life is too short to pretend like we're not all into some kinky shit.
I've just published chapter seven of Undercovers Detective. I would love your feedback on this story. I'm planning on ten chapters at least. If you haven't read one yet, I've included links. I hope you like them.