I thought this was interesting. I meet this gal online and we message back and forth for about three weeks. It develops into pretty hot chat. I mean, everything from straight sex to oral, anal, even rimming. We send pictures back and forth. I even sent her a video of me white water rafting (that another girl took from land, but that's a different story). After three weeks I ask her if she wants to meet. She asked me to send her another picture, which I do. She tells me she's been burned many times by guys who say they are younger and better looking than they are or send pictures of people not themselves. I've heard many stories like this.
We meet at a Starbucks and it's instantly apparent to me that her photos were doctored or done by one of those glamor photography studios. She' way different looking and heavier and older than her pictures make her out to be. I, on the other hand, send her casula pictures (and video) of me from the last three months. I decide to stay and see how it goes and crtainly don't mention my observations.
The evening goes well (no sex, but I wasn't expecting it).
The next day she writes me and says she will not be seeing me anymore because I was 20 - 30 lbs heavier than my photo and 5 years younger in my photo. I'm 6-foot-2 and weight 220. not skinny by any means but certainly not overweight looking. And she so obviously doctored her pics and I didn't. I had to read it twice because I thought at first she was acknowledging SHE looked 5 years younger and 30 lbs lighter in her photos but it was her accusing me of that... which I didn't do. How could she be so hypocritical?
I have not responded to her yet. Interested to see what you think the response should be... thank you
Honestly - I say, have at her. Tell her what you think (the observations you mention here). Just state it more factually and neutrally rather than emotionally so it doesn't appear that you're just saying this because she insulted you first. Then tell her that clearly this was a mismatch and good luck with life etc.
In my opinion, she opened the door to "honest opinion giving" with her note to you. If it was me, I would have just done a 'there was no chemistry, I'm not looking for anything further' or just do a fade away. There's a way to keep it classy if the attraction isn't there.
Sounds like she has a misguided impression of what she looks like. Photoshop can be a reality-crusher.
PS. a good option before meeting people is to each take a pic in the mirror with the date written on the mirror or a piece of paper and holding it up. At least you both get to know that it's a current pic etc. or do a cam-chat first.
Pictures can lie. They're only two dimensional. Sounds like her personality is as well.
I'd chalk it up as experience. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of a reply.
Although its too bad you didn't snap a picture of her when you met.
You could've sent it back to her with a picture she sent to you as a comparison so she could see the hypocrisy staring her in the face.
But then again... she probably wouldn't have noticed.
I have a tendency to be a little too honest about what I look like and what I am. I don't see any point in lying to someone (wheter I hope to meet them or not) and tell them I am a size 2 and look like Kate Beckinsale, when its not the truth. Any woman who would not only lie to you like that but then to turn the tables on you as well and state that you are the one lying, doesn't belong in your life.
I would say she has some issues of her own and she might have been upset to see that you actually matched the pics and she knew she didn't therefore its easy to blame someone else than to take the responsiblity to say "those pics of me were a few years old and I know I look different now I hope you weren't disappointed and that we can continue to talk." Thats one of the classier responses but people today are more interested in being "right" than doing whats right.
I wouldn't loose any sleep over this little girl parading herself as a woman. A real woman wouldn't have acted in such a juvinile manner.
Good Luck finding someone worthy of your time.
Angel
I love the suggestion of asking them to take a picture of themselves in the mirror with the date on it... that's funny but would work. In all honestly I was prepared to deal with the differences and if I liked her, I wasn't going to make a thing of it. I think a couple of you were right. I remember getting pictures made at my friend's wedding and I looked about as good as I could get in a tux. That was three years ago and I look at those pictures now and there's no way I'd send those to a woman who might meet me. I'll bet she just sees herself that way, the way she looked in those photoshopped pix.
If you want to have at her for being such a delusional hypocrite, who could really blame you. But in my opinion, that really isnt going to get you anywhere now is it? The girl is in her own world. She doctors her pics and after a while they are real to her. Its like the guy/girl who tells a lie so often they actually begin to believe it. Just let it go. You know you were being honest, what else do you need.
I once met this guy online and we became good friends. We exchanged pics just so we would know who we were chatting with. I really had no interest in meeting him but he put me through the ringer about my pics being real. He asked me to send him a pic wearing certain color clothes which I did and still he questioned me. This went on for a good while. It was a game to me so I went a long but once he asked me to hold up a piece of paper with the words "Four Score and Seven Years Ago" written on it. Well I said sure. So I sent him a pic of myself in a bikini holding a sign that said "Four Score and Seven Days Ago, I met a guy online who was such a loser, even his own hand rejected him. FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!" Needless to say I never heard from him again. No, it wasnt on Lush, LOL!!
You Cant Make This Shit Up!!HAHA
She's totally wasting your time I wouldn't give her another thought and on to the next. That is one reason I want pics on demand via text or see them live on cam as most people you meet online are totally full of shit!
Bunny12
Bunny Rabbits cute and fuzzy they want to love you but they have razor sharp teeth - don't piss them off! So I wrote her back and she responded. I have to share it with you that were advising me on this thread.
Jessica, I have to say I'm a little surprised. I'm certainly ok that you don't feel you and I were a good match but >>>>
I was really shocked that you would say you felt I misrepresented myself in the digital pix I sent >>>>
when the ones you sent me were so obviously doctored. My pix were taken within the last three months and >>>
were not doctored. Can you say the same? I find your comments fairly insulting when you seem to hold >>
yourself to a different standard. At any rate, I do wish you the best of luck. Take care.
...and then her response.
it's called yuen lui and very woman i know takes a few liberties like this. its different for a man than it is a woman. you should know that. men lie all the time. its in theyre nature. i just feel like i deserve the best and im not ashamed to believe it. i wish you well too.
Oh WOW! Be thankful you got away. WMM said you dodged a bullet... more like a tank.