I walked into the coffee shop and immediately locked eyes with Nick. I couldn’t stop the giddy smile from taking over my face, even though I worried that he would think I was a huge dork. We’d been texting back and forth for weeks, and I never actually expected to meet him in person – he seemed too good to be true. We shared a lot of similar interests and philosophies, and he was smart. Oh my god, was he smart? I’d never, in my twenty-five years, met a man who could actually hold a conversation. I was used to “what’s up?” and “wyd?” so he had to be some sort of bot or something, right?

Apparently not. The smile only grew wider as I walked towards him; he even looked like his pictures, if not better. I wondered what was going through his mind when he saw me. I really hoped he was just as enamored at first glance as I was. It was too soon, but I felt an immediate connection to him and my whole body tingled as I finally stood before him.

“Hey, how’re you doing, Ella?” He grinned and said. I tried to reply but all I could manage was a tiny giggle. He definitely thought I was a huge dork.

I pushed my short, copper curls behind my ear and tried again.

“It’s nice to meet you, in person.” Did I squeak? I probably squeaked.

We spent two hours in hard, uncomfortable chairs discussing our lives and our interests and exchanging sneaky, flirty glances at each other. I didn’t want the date to end, but it was getting to the point where we couldn’t think of anything else to say. He did most of the talking, but it wasn’t my fault. I couldn’t help but stare at the way his biceps pushed against the edge of his short sleeves, or the way his whole face lit up and crinkled when he smiled.

And don’t get me started on his accent. The way he dropped his g’s and replaced his r’s with uhh’s had me clenching my thighs underneath the table. Not that I would ever let him know. I had a rule about sex – it could never happen earlier than the third date, and only after we’d had the conversation about where he saw things going.

I was a good girl. I wanted to be a good girl – I was dating to find my soul mate, the man I would spend the rest of my life with and I quickly realized in college that sleeping with guys on a first date only gave them the impression that I was easy. So, three dates.

A few minutes of silence went by as I awkwardly fidgeted in my seat. He finally, unfortunately, stood up and reached out for my hand to pull me from my seat.

“I guess we’d better get going unless there’s anything else you can think of for us to do?”

I looked at him cautiously, a little of the euphoria dissipating at his assumption that I would go home with him after the first date. He seemed perfect, until literally this moment, and I could feel all my defenses start to rise.

“I’m not going home with you,” I replied quietly. I meant to put more oomph in it, but my voice came out meek. He just grinned at me again and started leading me into the parking lot.

“I wasn’t trying to suggest anything – I simply meant that I don’t want the night to end yet, so I was wondering if you had any other ideas of places I could take you? A late dinner, maybe?”

I melted again, looking at him with what I was sure were big, doe eyes.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get defensive. I’ve just been on a string of really… bad dates lately. And this has been going so well... I don’t want the night to end either, but I can’t think of anywhere to go, unless...” I trailed off. It wouldn’t be such a bad thing to go back to his place, right? If I put clear boundaries in place, it should be fine. And he did just make it clear that sex wasn’t his intention. I think.

“I ate dinner before we met up, but I guess we could go back to your place to hang out a little longer. Maybe watch a movie? I just have to tell you one thing first...” I laughed nervously, my cheeks flushing. I thought about making some sort of joke, but I’d already started and I was worried I would chicken out.

“I have a three-date rule,” I finally blurted out.

He just looked at me curiously. “I thought you were about to tell me you’re wanted for murder or something with how serious you got.”

I scoffed. “No, of course not! I just want to make it very clear that I’m not interested in…having sex with you tonight. Not that I’m not interested in you, or interested in sex with you. I’m very interested in both you and sex. And sex with you. I just mean that it’s not going to happen tonight. I understand if you want to end the date here, I just w…”

“Stop,” he chuckled. “It’s fine. I think you’re adorable. Stop worrying so much and let’s go.”

I followed him back to his place in my car, wondering the entire time what I was doing. This was definitely not like me, but I loved the way I was feeling around him and I didn’t want it to end. I was giddy with the anticipation of what would come next. I was extremely hopeful that this would turn into a relationship.

Once he pulled into a parking spot, nerves flared up in my stomach and I felt like I was going to be sick. I started to think of excuses to get me out of this. Anxiety was weighing me down and I started to overthink everything – we’d pretty much exhausted all topics of conversation over coffee, what else would we talk about? What movie would he put on? Would he ask me to choose? There’s no way I would be able to. Would he put his arm around me or kiss me? I really wanted him to kiss me and was hoping I wouldn’t have to wait until the end of the night.

My thoughts were interrupted by him lightly tapping on my window, where I was parked next to him. I took a deep breath, turned off my car, and opened the door. Just act normal, I repeated inside my head. The corner of his mouth tilted up and it was almost like he could tell what I was thinking. I could probably add intuitive to his list of positive qualities, which was growing surprisingly fast.

As soon as I stepped out of the car, he placed both palms on either side of me against the door and pressed his lips into mine. Butterflies came to life as tingles ran up and down my spine. His palms moved to rest against my waist as I put my arms around his neck and melted into him. His beard scratched against my face in the best way and his lips were impossibly soft and rough at the same time as they moved against mine.

After a few minutes, he pulled away and stared into my wide blue eyes.

“I wanted to get that out of the way.”

Speechless, and not sure exactly how to take that, I just smiled up at him. It’s not like I was going to complain about that kiss and now I couldn’t wait for more kisses.

“Please, don’t judge me too much. I really wasn’t expecting for this date to end up back at my place, so I didn’t do any cleaning today,” he said as we walked towards his front door.

I was still so nervous, and slightly turned on from the kiss, that I couldn’t come up with a reply. I really wasn’t sure why this man was into me – not only did I seem like a huge dork, but now I’d turned into a mute dork from my anxiety.

He opened the door and led me into a small, studio apartment. I could see the entire place from the entryway – the bed immediately to our right, the couch and TV next to it, and then the kitchen on the other side. I was guessing the bathroom must’ve been to the left. I was suddenly hyper-aware of how badly this could end. Did I really come back to a complete stranger’s apartment after a first date? I’d probably made up the connection and the fantastic conversations in my head. I was always told that I tended to look through rose-colored glasses. Oh god…

“What’s going on in that head of yours?” Nick asked, “It’s okay if you’re having second thoughts or want to leave. Maybe this was a little too fast.”

“No, no, I’m fine. I’m just a little….”

“Overwhelmed? Yeah, me too. I haven’t felt this way about anybody in a long time. I hope I’m not moving too fast, but I like you a lot.”

“You do?” I replied timidly. Maybe I hadn’t made it up. I just needed to get out of my head.

“Yes, I do. I feel like we have a great connection. I loved our conversations over text, and you are very pretty. I can’t wait to see where this goes.”

“Thank you. I feel the same way.”

“Good. Now sit down on the bed.” His demeanor shifted completely, going from sweet and sincere to suddenly stern and demanding. I was so surprised that I immediately obeyed without thinking, backing up until the back of my knees hit the bed and I fell onto my butt.

“Whaaa--?” I stuttered nervously.

Nick stalked towards me, unbuttoning the buttons on his shirt as he got closer and closer. He stood in front of me and pulled it off, exposing the contour of his chest and his abs. I stared at the bulge of his muscles, shocked but also slightly aroused. My god, he was huge.

“Now that we’ve established that we like each other, and I know you’re attracted to me, it’s time to be a good girl and listen.” His voice was commanding, the way he was staring down at me sent a bolt of fear through my chest and stomach. It took everything in me to muster up the courage to reply.

“I… I'm not sure about this.” I tried to put conviction in my words, but I was starting to get scared. He put me at ease for a split second, only to rip it away immediately after.

“I understand. But, like I said, it’s time to be a good girl. You want to be a good girl, don’t you? If you really don't want this, tell me now.” He waited for a beat, but when I didn't reply, he pushed against my shoulders so that I fell with my back against the bed. I was paralyzed. What was happening? This was a completely different man from the one I’d been talking to literally two minutes ago. Surely, he was just teasing me. We would probably make out and then move to the couch to watch a movie, I told myself.

Before I could react, his hands were at my knees, pushing up my skirt until it was bunched around my waist. I tried to squirm backward away from him, but he grabbed my ankles and pushed them up until my feet were on the bed. He slid his palms up to my knees and, instinctively, I pushed them closed but he just chuckled as he gripped one in each hand and pulled them back apart.

“I want to see your pussy spread out in front of me.”

Shock shot through my core as reality started settling in. Was this really happening? I didn't tell him no, but wasn't this moving too fast?

“Listen, I think you got the wrong impression…” I started to say, but then he started rubbing the folds of my pussy with one hand, while still holding my other leg open by his grip on my knee. I whimpered and went still. It felt so good.

“You’re so wet, darling. You are being a very good girl, and good girls get rewarded.”

He rubbed me through my panties for another minute, before reaching to undo the button on his jeans.

Shame turned my whole body hot because he was right! I was completely soaked. If I looked down, I could see the wetness dripping through the silk of my panties at my lips. I wanted this, I was quivering with need, but I was too embarrassed to speak. My body was having a visceral reaction to his touch.

I tried to get up again, but he’d already undone his jeans and boxers and dropped them both to the floor. His dick was rock hard and larger than any I’d ever seen, causing me to pause a split second which was all the time he needed to grab both my wrists and hold them down against the bed over my head in one hand. His other hand went back to my slick folds, rubbing the silk against my clit once, twice, before he yanked my panties to the side of my pussy lips.

I was on fire, quivering. I opened my mouth again to say something but he shoved his dick deep inside my pussy so swiftly that I couldn’t get another word out. Shocked, I started struggling against his grip on my wrists, jerking my hips to try and get away from the pain his sudden penetration caused. His other arm wrapped around my thigh, pulling it up as he pounded into me. The new angle caused me to cry out and jerk away from him even more, the intensity too much. My cries just seemed to spurn him on as he pumped harder and harder.

“You are so wet and swollen, you feel so good, darling.”

I whimpered at his words and he pressed his lips against mine, using his tongue to force mine open and then pulling my tongue into his mouth. I felt a flood of wetness in my pussy as he sucked and kissed my lips and tongue and I gladly succumbed. Tiny bolts of electricity started shocking the walls of my pussy and I tightened around him. Ashamed of how my body was reacting, the fight ebbed from my limbs and I went limp, succumbing to how good he felt so deep inside me.

As he pumped into me, over and over, I started to feel the waves of an orgasm creep up. My body tingled as I crested the edge, eventually giving in and letting the release happen. My pussy contracted on his throbbing dick as he whispered, “Good girl” into my ear. I felt his dick swelling, hitting every wall inside of me as it started to pulse. He groaned and then his dick started to convulse as he filled me up with his cum.   

“Oh, god.” I sobbed as I realized what we'd just done. He pulled out of me and grabbed a rag, wrapping it around his dick to squeeze the last of the cum out as he stared down, shamelessly, at my pussy dripping with our mixed fluids. When he was done, he gently pressed the rag into my folds to soak up some of the mess. He leaned down and kissed my forehead, but I was still paralyzed. Why couldn’t I move?

I watched him disappear in the direction I assumed the bathroom was and I finally sat up, pulling my skirt back down to cover the evidence of what had just happened. Should I leave?

He came back into the room a minute later and sat down on the bed next to me, arranging the pillows behind his back to get comfortable. He opened his arms and beckoned for me. “Come here, darling.”

Without thinking, I scooted back into his arms and lay down next to him, my head still going a million miles a minute. I should leave, I thought again. But suddenly my eyelids grew heavy, the warmth of his arm around me and the beat of his heart slowly leeching away my anxiety and lulling me into a state of calm. I was too comfortable to move.

He grabbed a remote from a table beside his bed and turned on the TV, scrolling aimlessly through Netflix. Surely…It was okay, right? I mean, this was so normal. He wouldn’t be acting this way if he’d done something wrong. My body relaxed as I snuggled into him and let sleep pull me in. We’d talk about it in the morning, I felt too good to move.