I'm feeling sea-sick in my own bed. My husband hasn’t been sleeping, which means I haven’t been sleeping. Let me tell you, when his six-foot-two, two-hundred-and-thirty-pound body tosses and turns, it feels like a tidal wave rocking the mattress beneath me. We fucked before bedtime; both of us came so hard we immediately collapsed into sleep. But he didn't stay asleep. Work is troubling him lately, stirring his mind.
Others see him as a little stern maybe, but he is always fair with his employees. Over the last month, a good friend had been making costly mistakes. My husband is his supervisor and can’t let his actions continue unaddressed. He knows his friend is distracted by his pending divorce and feels for him but still needs him to perform his duties at an acceptable level. Today, his friend violated a safety protocol and my husband had to let him go, knowing the loss of his job in addition to the loss of his wife will be crippling. I see the pain on his face as soon as he walks through the door.
Usually, he is a good communicator, but when he becomes really upset, he withdraws. As his wife, I need to figure out what he needs. I quietly study him for a while. His fists tighten and then release. His eyes stare at the television, but I can tell his mind is elsewhere. Dark circles line his usually bright eyes. He looks like he aged today. His mood - brooding.
What does he need? Sex comes to mind. Should I just climb onto his lap, easing his recliner back, and unzipping his pants? He is so keyed-up, he would probably quickly cum with me riding him. Would that relieve his stress? Sometimes when he is upset, a rough, quick fuck is just what he needs. I let him bend me over and ravage my pussy, releasing his frustrations with his cum. But now, watching his slumping body, I decide he is too tired for sex. He looks absolutely exhausted.
Hmmm. Maybe a blow job? I could crawl over to him and nestle between his knees and give him head. Sometimes, if I see he is tired, I suck him off, not letting him touch me. It relaxes him. But still, my instincts tell me that is too much stimulation for him at this moment.
Memories flood my mind of my dear husband. He has been such a great provider, unselfish, sensual lover, and thoughtful companion. It is usually him making sure my needs are met. I need to reciprocate now. Think, think, think. What soothes him?
Then, I remember a special time in our life. I had been nursing our son and the day came when he rejected my nipple. My husband held me while I sobbed in his strong arms. Of course, I knew this time would come, but I wasn’t ready yet to lose this closeness with my son. It felt like rejection. Then, my husband did something very loving. He bent his head down and suckled my breast. Neither of us planned for this to happen.
The months that followed were some of the most intimate for us. He suckled my breasts every day. We researched erotic lactation and discovered other couples engaged in this intimate act. It was a special time for us every night, with both of us receiving pleasure through this new experience. I find it hard to explain except to say we felt deeply connected. Erotic lactation takes commitment, which brought us closer together.