We, Force Two, had been in space for a long time, too long. Euphoria spread amongst us when we saw it, the first planet to appear outside of our galaxy. We quickly batted possible names for it about. We decided on Shambala and prepared to land.

Except we didn’t land, we crashed, and when I counted all the dead bodies, I knew I was the only survivor. I need not tell you how low and desperate I felt. There it was before me, like the blood on my face; I could swiftly end it all or I could explore the planet.

I chose to search for life on the planet. Lucky for me, I made the right choice because it allowed me to meet, well, I will call it, Mableleen. She wasn’t a monster but I could certainly describe her as monstrous, and at the very least, absolutely hideous.

I was having trouble breathing without my helmet when she discovered me. Right away she was helpful, life-saving, you might say. She said, "Suck on this."

'This' was a tube coming out of her body.

By the way, let me describe her body if I might. She was all tubes and tentacles, with thousands of eyes and holes, patched together with rough, scaly skin. 

No doubt about it, that tube saved my life. I was able to inhale a gas that seemed similar to oxygen, only more potent and energizing. I began to thrive. I began to feel excited about life. I was jumping up and down and, curiously enough, having an erection, a very big erection, much bigger than any erection I had ever had on Earth.

Then I heard some distance sound, a faraway whisper, carried by the wind through the empty, rocky canyons. I could barely make it out until it suddenly became quite clear to me. I heard,

“Fuck me, fuck me now.”

It was Mableleen. Somehow she had been able to project her voice.

Mableleen stirred beside me and pointed to one of her holes, a hairy patch that looked like a California succulent. It became slick and glistened in the night.

Surely a madness was upon me as I stripped off my spacesuit. My dick was popping out, like a whale’s tail breaking water. Its weight tilted me towards the ground.

Mableleen grabbed it with a tentacle and placed it in one of her larger holes. Her muscles clamped it and churned it.

My head was swirling and my body was a-whirling, as she squeezed and tossed me about. She settled me down by putting a different tentacle up my ass, and pumped in and out, filling my hole with goo. She kept it up until I was coming in waves, making a very big splash!

With that, she told me to rest. Once I had rested, she said it was time to eat. We sat down to dinner. Pray, she ordered and I did so over the several silver serving dishes that lay before us on a lengthy table of stone.

When I lifted their covers, one by one, every dish was bare as a bone, nothing at all was there.

“Where’s the food?’ I said.

Mableleen told me to keep it cool, to be calm and breathe.

Next, she took a bite out of my arm, a huge chunk, and spit it out.

Ignoring my cries, she said, “Welcome to Mantis. You, you, my friend, are the food!”

Believe me, I was extremely thankful when I woke up in my bed and the nightmare was over. Even though my dick was so much smaller, I was just so grateful to be alive.

But to be honest, I have been having a series of reoccurring, perverse nightmares that, inexplicably, are also wet dreams and I am not sure what to do about them.