Dear Agony Aunt Claire,
Something has happened in my life that troubles me. I am a recently retired man who has been happily married to my wife for more years than I would care to remember. We still have a sex life, though over the years it has dwindled to Sunday morning after our morning cuppa. At this point, I don’t know if she is doing it for me or I’m doing it for her. Nevertheless, I believe it’s an arrangement that suits us both. Well, it was, but something has stirred in me that, as I said, troubles me.
I think I know the culprit. I’m sure you know that, at our time of life, we have a routine with almost every aspect of our married life. Whilst we are nothing like the couple in the film Shirley Valentine, with me wanting egg and chips every Tuesday, we nevertheless have an unchanging shopping list. So imagine my horror when I sat down to breakfast the following day after we had been to the supermarket and my Wheatabix tasted of banana.
At first I thought it was a mistake on their part and I went to examine the box. It was everything a regular Wheatabix box should look like, but underneath, in much smaller writing; it said banana flavoured. Well, I can tell you I felt hoodwinked and also a little embarrassed that I hadn’t noticed. There was only one thing for it. I would have to finish the box and pretend to my wife, who doesn’t eat it, that it’s just a normal packet of Wheatabix.
But here’s the strange thing! My wife bent over to pick up some dirty clothes for washing and I was surprised that I couldn’t take my eyes off her round and curvy bottom. It wasn’t even Sunday, and I’d become interested in her ample bum. Over the course of the next few days and after eating more of the banana Wheatabix my fascination for her bottom grew stronger to the point of it replacing my usual admiration of her boobs.
By Friday I was hypnotized. I took every opportunity to walk behind her, admiring the poetic rise and fall of the cheeks as she walked in front of me. I even deliberately dropped things on the floor and pretended I hadn’t seen them, so I could watch her bend over and pick them up.
I was really troubled by these thoughts and wouldn’t eat the banana Wheatabix for the rest of the week. Thankfully, it worked and things returned to normal. Well, almost! During our usual Sunday morning love making, I found myself asking her to get on all fours so I could enter her from behind. This was something I would normally have never conceived of but she complied and although my knees ached, I achieved satisfaction very quickly with more thrusting than I was used to exercising.
My question Claire is! Should I continue to eat the rest of my banana Wheatabix knowing what it does to me or should I throw the rest of it to the birds and once again return to admiring my wife’s boobs ?
Dear Eric.
Thank you for getting in touch. Your story intrigued me about the banana Wheatabix encouraging your mind to explore other things sexually. As for doing things differently with your wife ! Perhaps you are worried about being more carnal with her and more beastial. Well don’t be. You didn’t mention that your wife was against entry from behind. Had she objected, I’d have thought it would have been like riding a bucking bronco. However, if you have decided not to continue to eat the banana Wheatabix then things might well return to normal again. Personally I enjoy my bottom being stroked and wouldn’t object if Mr Agony Aunt stroked and fondled mine. Please let me know your decision.
Agony Aunt Claire.
Dear Claire,
In the interests of not wanting to waste food, I ended up eating the banana Wheatabix. Again, and the same feelings came back stronger, the more I ate them. By the time the box was empty, I had more lust in me than I had as a teenager. So much so that I had to have my wife again from behind, and it was only Wednesday. It was carnal, and it was lustful. You might even call it beastial, so intent was I to satisfy my urge.
She was wearing a pleated dress that swayed around the hem with every breath of air and the sight was too much for me. I lifted the hem of her dress, pulled aside her panties to admire the lovely shape of her bottom and with as much urgency as I could muster, entered her as she was leaning over the kitchen sink. What happened next was urgent and rapid. She wriggled and squirmed with surprise, and that only made me grit my teeth and thrust even harder. Needless to say I didn’t last long and came inside her very quickly. Shocked at what I’d done, I covered her up, apologised and left the room.
We’ve never been a couple that had discussed sex between ourselves and even after this, not a word was said. She behaved towards me as if I’d made her a cup of tea. Life very quickly returned to normal, and I managed to keep myself from seizing other opportunities whenever she bent over to get or pick something up, though I must admit our usual Sunday routine ended with my wife on all fours again while I kissed and caressed the object of my new found fetish before eagerly entering her in that doggy fashion way.
Once again, I didn’t last long and shocked myself by giving out a very loud grunt on the final thrust. I apologised again and beat a hasty retreat to the shower. On returning to the bedroom, there was a cup of tea waiting for me and my wife downstairs singing along to a tune being played on the radio.
Claire, my box of banana Wheatabix was finished a few days ago and already the desire to have sex with my wife’s bottom looking at me has begun to wane. Part of me would like to return to what I considered normal but a bigger part of me now wants to buy another box of banana Wheatabix and explore my new love of my wife’s curvy posterior. Overwhelmingly, it’s probably what I’m going to do. This means that I need to talk to her but I can’t. It’s too much for me. If I tell her of our correspondence would you please try and make things right between us?
Thank you,
Eric.
Dear Eric.
Thank you for letting me know how you are getting on. You really think there is something in this banana Wheatabix? I think it’s time for Mr Agony Aunt to get out of his Shredded Wheat rut and experience a new breakfast cereal. As for your new interest in your wife’s bottom, well think no more of it and don’t worry about it. As I have said, I enjoy my bottom being fondled and caressed though this hasn’t happened for quite some time. Of course I will willingly correspond with your wife and try to find some agreement between you both.
Agony Aunt Claire
Dear Claire.
My name is Betty, Eric’s wife. He has told me that he has written to you about the new difference in our married life and that you may have advice that could lead to him and I being more frank with each other. I’m not sure what’s bothering him but as far as I’m concerned, things are ticking along nicely though I must admit he has suddenly become very eager when it comes to sex.