“What’ll it be?”

“Martini. Gin. Dry.”

The bar wasn’t particularly busy, at least not yet. The music was too loud. He hadn’t been in a bar in years, but he could see that nothing had changed since he was a young man frequenting such places. The obligatory pack of straight women who thought it hip to hang at a gay bar. The table of lesbians, looking smug with their lovers, knowing they wouldn’t be lonely tonight. And the young men; all those men, hovering like so many predators, trying to hide the loneliness they felt as they hoped to find someone to assuage it for a night.

Frank twirled the stem, then took a sip. The first drink of the night and it was good. That first drink always tasted the best. The bartender put two olives on a plastic spear on a napkin near him.

“Thanks,” Frank said.

He bit into an olive and ate half of it, then took another sip of his drink.

“Hello,” a voice said, startling him.

He had been lost in his own thoughts.

“My name’s Zach,” the man said, flashing a brilliant smile at him.

He had a full beard. Frank detested facial hair. Tony had fine, delicate features and very little body hair. His facial hair was sparse and he shaved daily. Just one of the many things he loved about Tony.

“What’s your name?” the man said, when Frank didn’t answer.

“No offense,” Frank said, coolly. “But I’m really not in the mood to talk.”

“None taken,” the boy said, flashing that smile again. “Good night.”

The boy looked no more than twenty five or six. He wistfully thought back to when he was that age. Frank had graduated high school at exactly the moment in history when, for the first time ever, being a gay male was a death sentence. Though the world was a homophobic place, you could forget that in LA in 1981. The scene was alive, it was happening, it was everywhere. Then, just when Frank began to understand and accept his sexual identity, it was over. There wasn’t a person he knew that didn’t lose a friend to AIDS, or more likely, many friends.

Monogamy seemed the only way to deal with it, but monogamy requires a lover you can stand; and that can put up with your shit. Frank had spent many nights in just such a bar as this, trying to hide the fear of being lonely, as these men were. That’s when he learned that pot disguised the loneliness. Over the years, he found that alcohol did a better job.

He suddenly remembered what had started the fight with Tony. Another plea from Tony to stop drinking so much had gotten the usual, sarcastic, shitty response from Frank. Tony was used to Frank’s bitchiness, but Frank went too far. They both knew that Tony would be back; he always came back, no matter how shitty Frank treated him. Tony adored Frank, would always adore Frank. And Frank? Well, he adored being adored, and he enjoyed sex without worrying about condoms or disease. And if he was to live a life of monogamy, at least Tony was attractive. And there was the sex; the sex was always good. Frank’s expression softened, as he thought about the sex.

“Another?” the bartender asked.

Frank nodded, then drained the rest of his drink. He looked around, noticing that the bar was beginning to fill, though it wasn’t yet nine. He saw his young man, flashing his smile at everyone he saw. Had he been so obviously desperate, at that age? Frank decided he probably had been. It’s easy to forget, in the smugness that comes with having a lover, how lonely life can be without one. He had met Tony fifteen years earlier, as a client, and they had been together ever since. It was by far the closest Frank had ever come to being happy.

Zach came back over.

“Back so soon,” Frank said sarcastically.

The smile ran from Zach’s face.

“Why did you come here?”

“Well, I could claim that I came for a drink,” Frank said. “Though that may seem odd, since this is a bar.”

“That’s bullshit,” Zach said. “You could have had a drink at home, for less money than you’ll pay here.”

“So you tell me, Dr. Phil. Why did I come?”

“You came hoping to meet someone. Perhaps for pleasant conversation, perhaps more.”

“And?”

“Perhaps me.”

Frank chortled in his drink.

“You? No offense, but you’re hardly my type.”

“I don’t give a shit about that.”

Frank shrugged his shoulder.

“Are you finding the conversation pleasant here?” Frank asked.

“No, I guess not.”

Frank went back to his drink, while Zach stood and left.

He sneered as he saw Zach approach another man, desperately hoping to find someone to take away the loneliness, if just for a night.

“Young fools,” Frank thought. “They go out at night dressed as though they’re going to the supermarket, and they have fat bellies already.

The look popular among gay males, when Frank entered the scene, was well groomed, short hair, mustaches or no facial hair, and thin, as epitomized by Freddie Mercury. Just that week, he had seen in a men’s magazine that “the look” today was a burly man with a full beard.

“They’re too lazy to stay in shape, so they just change ‘the look’ instead, to a "lumberjack” he thought.

Frank was about the same weight as when he graduated from high school, at 5’10”, 168 pounds. Tony was thin as well, and dressed meticulously. Frank saw to that. He had dreamed of being a fashion designer, but had settled on a life in retail, working as a clerk in a very high end men’s clothing store.

As Frank started his third, Zach approached again. Frank was a bit mellower now.

“Struck out elsewhere?”

Zach didn’t answer that.

“Looks like you’re having fun,” he said.

Now Frank didn’t answer.

“You’re pretty good at drinking, aren’t you?”

“I practice.”

Frank thought back to the years he had spent in places like this, knowing that he would probably strike out, like so many nights before. The desperation that set in as the bar began to empty. And he thought of the nights when he did find someone, going back to his apartment or theirs, waking up with a strange man, the awkward goodbyes. It wasn’t a life he missed. Still, there was the thrill of the hunt, especially when he scored, that was unlike anything he now knew. No, he wouldn’t go back to this way of life, but he could still sense the thrill of someone new.

“Why don’t you come to my place?” Zach said.

“Like I said, you aren’t my type.”

“What’s your type?”

“Well, I prefer men that don’t dress like they’re going to a barn raising. I prefer men that are meticulously groomed. And I’m not much attracted to that twenty pounds of fat you’re waiting to birth.”

“Ouch.”

“You asked.”

“Fair enough. Why don’t you come over anyway?”

“Why are you here? I’m old enough to be your father. You know that, don’t you?”

“Perhaps I have a thing for older men.”

“Perhaps you have a thing for anything you can find.”

“Double ouch,” he said, rising.

“Hold on, cowboy, I didn’t say no.”

Zach stared at him. Was the old man playing with him?

“I didn’t say yes, either.”

Zach sat back down.

“How long has it been since you had sex,” Zach asked.

“Let me see,” Frank said, as he feigned deep thought.

“Two days. You?”

“More like four months,” Zach said. “Listen, you won’t be sorry."

“How could he possibly know that,” Frank thought. “Why would I jeopardize my relationship for a fling with a young, fat kid with a beard?”

Zach laid his hand on Frank’s arm.

“What’s your name,” he asked, softly.

“It’s Frank.”

“Frank, won’t you come over?” he asked, looking into his eyes.

Zach’s lonely eyes pleaded with him. There was no way that Frank would say yes, he’d already decided that. Still, all the old feelings of the hunt rushed back into his memory, thrilling him with the excitement he remembered feeling when he found a mate for the night. Frank remembered the horniness of a twenty-five year old. He knew that Zach would put up with any insult Frank could hurl, so long as he had a chance of getting him in bed.

He wondered again, as he had so many times over the years why he hurt anyone that tried to get close to him.

“I think I may,” Frank said, surprising even himself.

He hadn’t expected to be interested in another man, especially a boy, but the thought of an unknown lover suddenly overwhelmed him with excitement. A young man, one who had gone months without sex, one who had to be incredibly desperate for the feel of another man. He remembered the wild abandonment with which he had wrestled with nude strangers when he had been that age, their bodies dripping with sweat as they pulled every ounce of pleasure they could take from one another. Sex with Tony was pleasant, but it wasn’t sweaty, and it wasn’t urgent. Sex with this boy would be both.

Frank could read the emotions on the boy’s face. He obviously wondered whether Frank was toying with him, while desperately hoping he wasn’t. He drained his drink, then stood.

“Well?” he said.

Zach quickly got up and they left. His apartment was in a nice building in WeHo, within walking distance of the bar. Frank was surprised that it was relatively clean. While the decor wouldn’t make the cover of a design magazine, it wasn’t atrocious.

“Can I get you anything?” Zach asked.

Frank delighted in the boy’s nervousness. He couldn’t remember being as thrilled and excited in years, but he was calm, not at all nervous. He had been in similar positions many times, but now he was older and wiser, and planned to enjoy himself immensely.

“Show me your bedroom.”

Zach led the way, turning on the lights. Frank went to the nightstand and turned on a lamp, then went back and turned off the light. He sat on a chair and removed his shoes and socks. Zach did the same, never taking his eyes off of Frank. He began taking off his shirt as Zach watched, folding it carefully and hanging it over a chair. Then he removed his pants, folding them over the chair, and dropped his underwear. Zach followed his every movement, staring incredulously.

Frank tingled with excitement as he watched the young man ogling his body. Frank had always felt good about his body. He didn’t have much body hair, and what he did have, he kept waxed. It turned on Tony to have a smooth lover, and Frank loved the feeling of being smooth.

“Your body is incredible,” Zach said.

“So glad you approve,” Frank said sarcastically.

Frank immediately regretted it, as he saw the boy wince. He didn’t know why he was so fucking nasty to everybody. Still, he knew it wouldn’t affect his pleasure. There was nothing he could do that would make the boy change his mind. He could see the excitement on the boy’s face, as he anticipated sex with him.

He went to the boy, who embraced him, fondling his buttocks as Frank rested his head on the boy’s chest. He was a large boy, perhaps 6’2” and over 200 pounds. Frank looked up into his face, and their lips met. It was tenuous at first, then more passionate. Frank found, and unbuttoned a button on his shirt as they kissed, then another. Breaking their kiss, he unbuttoned the rest of them and took off his shirt. Of course he didn’t have it tucked in. And of course his body was a mess of thick hair, matted down from his clothes.

Now he fumbled with his pants, unclasping them, then pulling them down the boy’s legs. The boy lifted one leg, then the other, and Frank laid the pants down neatly on his dresser. Kneeling on the floor in front of him, Frank grasped the waistband of the boy’s shorts and tugged. He could see the outline of the boy’s penis, stiff, through the material.

Pulling the waistband up tightly, he trapped his scrotum and hard penis in his shorts. The boy moaned. Slowly, Frank began pulling the shorts down his legs, exposing his genitals. The boy’s penis was large, larger than Tony’s, and definitely larger than Frank’s. It was the first time in fifteen years that Frank had seen a man other than Tony, and he devoured the boy’s cock with his eyes. It was only a few inches from his face, bobbing and swaying as he removed the boy’s shorts. Despite the fact that the boy had pubic hair, he found it to be one of the most incredibly exciting things he had ever seen.

He ached to touch it, to feel it, to taste it. He gently caressed the boy’s sac as he rubbed his smooth cheek against his cock. Zach put his hands on Frank’s head as his cock was caressed. Frank licked his way slowly up the shaft as he cupped his balls. When he reached the head, he opened his mouth wide and held the boy in his mouth as he licked his shaft with his tongue. He was gentle, not wanting to take the boy too far, too quickly. The boy's knees buckled, and he stumbled. Frank stood, and went to the bed.

“Will you use a condom?” he asked.

“If you make me,” Zach said.

“Are you diseased?”

“No.”

Frank said nothing, so Zach assumed he didn’t have to. Frank detested condoms. If he was going to risk everything for a moment’s pleasure, it might as well be the most pleasure possible. The boy went to his bathroom and got a couple of towels, then reached into a dresser drawer and got out some lubricant and a cock ring.

“Just to make sure I last,” Zach said, nodding to the cock ring and smiling. “Will you put it on me,” he said, as he sat on the bed next to Frank.

Frank took the device and put it on him, then played with his erection, lubricating it generously. He loved the way the ring made the boy’s cock stand out even more prominently, and the way his cock glistened with the lubricant. The ring would trap the blood in his cock, making it harder and increasing his stamina. They embraced, rubbing their erections against each other as they kissed and caressed each other. The feeling of the boy’s erection against his own was incredible. He couldn’t keep his hands off the boy’s genitals, and the boy’s hands roamed Frank’s body as well.

Every fiber in the boy’s body screamed to have him ram his dick inside Frank, but he desperately wanted this moment to last, and he desperately wanted the man’s approval. Frank sensed his extreme arousal, and knew the boy wouldn’t last long. Reluctantly, he released the boy’s erection and turned over, allowing the boy to spoon against his back.

“Just hold me for a bit,” Frank said, as he enjoyed the feeling of the boy’s erection against his body.

The boy clasped him tightly, running his hands over his smooth chest and abs, then down to his genitals. He pressed against Frank and moaned as he held Frank’s erection, lightly caressing it, not wanting to make the man cum just yet. Frank turned his head and their lips met. As their kiss became more passionate, the grinding of their bodies against each other became more physical.

“Oh, God, I want you so badly,” Zach said.

Frank could feel him tremble in his extreme state of arousal, and he turned toward him, holding him as their lips met again.

“Unggghhh,” Zach moaned, close to orgasm.

He flipped Frank back over onto his side as though he weighed nothing, then guided his cock toward Frank’s ass. Frank eagerly anticipated penetration. He had learned early how popular a lover he could be if he tolerated bottoming. Far from tolerating it, he had come to love the feeling of a man holding him tightly while penetrating him. The thousands of nerve endings around the sphincter that were excited by penetration, combined with the intense pleasure of prostate stimulation was something that Frank never tired of.

As the boy worked his fat cock into Frank, he grunted from the tightness. His head wasn’t even in yet, though the boy was close to orgasm.

Pulling away, Frank said, “Hold on a minute.”

Turning over, he applied more lubricant to the boy, then straddled his crotch and leaned forward. In this position, Frank could take the lead. He grabbed the boy’s cock and held it against his anus, then pushed against it. He lowered and raised his hips, working it in. When he was penetrated, he leaned forward, pressing his lips against the boy’s as they mated. As he humped the boy’s dick, his erection rubbed against the boy’s crotch. Frank groaned as his dick began spitting. That took the boy over the edge. Raising his hips to meet Frank’s thrusts, he sprayed a huge load of thick, sticky cum deep inside him.

As they rested in each other’s arms, Frank knew that if he caressed the young boy long enough, he would be able to get another erection from him tonight. That was the beauty of being twenty five. And the next one would last much longer. Frank intended to enjoy every moment of it. Tomorrow, he could regret it. Tonight, he would enjoy it.