As soon as I rang Sean's apartment doorbell, I knew there was no turning back from what I was about to do. I wouldn't allow myself to lose my nerve. But in those seconds before he answered, I grew lightheaded from anxiety. Running a hand through my mop of dark curls, I again silently rehearsed what I planned to say.
When Sean opened the door, his smile made me feel like I was on a rollercoaster, with my stomach in free fall.
"Hey, Travis!" Though he was clearly surprised by me showing up at his door, his brown eyes filled with warmth.
All my careful plans evaporated at the sight of him. "Amber's cheating on you," I blurted out.
Sean's gaze darkened at my words, and I feared he was angry. Still, he opened the door wider and said, "Come on in."
Swallowing hard, I strode past him and made a beeline for the couch. Not even my tactless outburst could cause Sean to forget his manners, for he was quick to ask if I'd like a drink.
"I'm good, thanks." Glancing around, I spotted one of Amber's hair clips on an end table. Her sweater was draped over the back of a nearby chair. There were reminders of my sister everywhere.
Sitting down next to me, he released a heavy sigh. I expected him to bombard me with questions, but he simply muttered, "I suspected as much."
"I'm sorry." I started to place a comforting hand on his arm, then thought better of it. "I like you, Sean. A lot. And I didn't feel it was right to keep quiet about what Amber's doing." Of course, I had other motives for revealing my sister's betrayal, but I'd make those known soon enough.
Sean slumped back against the couch. His hair was as dark as mine, but he wore it a little neater. Though he usually did whatever my sister wanted, he hadn't yet shaved his beard. Amber complained that it made him look like a slacker; she preferred clean-cut guys. Right now, he was still dressed in business casual, having just gotten home from work on a Friday evening.
I'd been preparing for this conversation all day. While sitting in classes at the local university where I was a student, I hadn't heard a word my professors said. I was too busy imagining all the ways this discussion with Sean might play out.
I also knew I had a small window of opportunity to talk to him. Earlier that afternoon, Amber had left town with several of her friends. They had tickets to see a favorite band in concert on Saturday, and they planned to make an entire weekend out of the event. I couldn't help but wonder if the guy Amber was cheating with also intended to make the three-hour drive in order to meet up with her.
Like me, Amber still lived at home. I was twenty and a full-time student, whereas she was twenty-three. Sean was two years her senior. I knew Sean and Amber had talked about her moving in with him at some point, but my sister seemed content to live rent-free at home, where my parents treated her like a queen. Though she had an office job, I suspected that her ultimate goal was to land a rich husband so she wouldn't have to work.
If I had to choose between Amber and Sean, he would win every time. For an entire year, he'd dated my sister, and every single day of their relationship, I wanted to ask him why he was wasting time with her. There was no question that she was beautiful, with long, chestnut-brown hair and a figure that made men practically drool. Maybe it was the physical attraction that kept Sean wrapped around her finger, but I feared he actually loved her. When she spoke, he adoringly hung on every word. Whatever she asked for, he bent over backwards to provide.
And all the while, I struggled to hide my desire for my sister's boyfriend. He'd always been kind, expressing a genuine interest in what was going on in my life. Six months ago, I'd come out to my family, and while Amber had snorted at the news and said, "Tell us something we don't already know," Sean actually gave me a hug. Later, when the two of us were alone for a few minutes in the living room, he revealed he'd gone through a "bi-curious" stage in college, during which he'd experimented with a few guys. He'd sworn me to secrecy, and the fact that he'd shared such an intimate detail with me and not Amber made my feelings for him intensify.
Now, I worked up the nerve to rest a hand on Sean's knee. "You deserve better than Amber," I said gently. "She only cares about herself."
As he stared straight ahead, I noticed his jaw tightening. "How did you find out?"
"I heard her on the phone a couple of days ago." My face reddened as I recalled that conversation, which my sister had no idea I'd overheard. Its explicit nature left no doubt in my mind that she was fucking someone else.
Sean's gaze dropped to my hand. It took all my courage to leave it on his knee. "She's been different lately," he said in a low voice. "More distant. Always making excuses as to why she needs to be somewhere else." Finally, he met my stare. "I know I should be furious, but I think I've been bracing for the end of our relationship for weeks. Part of me was in denial before. Now? I'm just hurt that she didn't respect me enough to be honest."
Before I could stop myself, I slipped my arms around Sean. He readily hugged me back. "Amber's a fool," I murmured.
"Thank you for coming to me about this, Travis." His embrace tightened just a little. "I promise when I talk to her, I won't say a word about our conversation. I think she'll come clean if I tell her my suspicions."
He started to withdraw from me, but I wouldn't let him leave my arms. For months, I'd ached to feel him hold me like this. I craved his touch and his scent, and now that he was so close, I lost all self-restraint. Burying my face in his neck, I whispered, "If you were mine, I'd spend every day doing my best to make you happy."
I sensed him tense at my words. Immediately, I feared I'd made a horrible mistake. Yet Sean simply murmured, "Oh, Travis..." He patted me on the back, like I was the one who needed comforting. I felt ridiculous for believing he could have the slightest interest in me. But my humiliation didn't stop me from pressing my lips against his skin.
I expected him to push me away. When he didn't, I dared to slide my hand up his thigh. His sharp intake of breath was loud in the otherwise quiet room. "Please," I begged him. "Please let me help you forget about her."
"Travis, we can't." Weaving his fingers through my hair, Sean gently drew me back from him. His expression was so intense that I struggled to meet his eyes. "I think you're a great guy, and I've loved hanging out with you. But I'm still in a relationship with your sister."
"Not for much longer." I hated the neediness in my voice. "And I know that after you two break up, I'll probably never see you again. So just give me tonight, okay?" Now, I did have to look away. My throat tightened, and my chest ached as I waited for Sean to answer. Never had I wanted someone this much.
"Hey." His tone was gentle, and when I met his gaze, I was surprised at the tenderness in it. "You and I will always be friends, I promise."
"I want us to be more than friends."
Sean started to speak again, but before he had a chance, I kissed him. He made a surprised sound as I cupped his face in my hands. Simply being in his arms had gotten my dick hard, and I was powerless to control my arousal. The moment our tongues touched, I moved to slide onto his lap.
"Travis, we have to stop." Sean was breathing faster. Even as he tried to dissuade me, his hands roamed over my body.
"No, we don't. I want to make you feel good, Sean." Reaching between us, I moaned to feel his erection through his pants. He was big, I discovered. Bigger than I'd ever experienced in my few short-lived relationships. I'd heard Amber make insinuations to her friends about the size of Sean's cock; she claimed he'd ruined her for all other men. Now, I realized exactly what she'd meant!
"Ah fuck, that feels really good!" He looked down to watch me stroke him. "But this is wrong."
"It isn't," I insisted.
As Sean gazed up at me, I sensed he was struggling, torn between his conscience and his desire. The moment he drew me to him for another kiss, I knew his desire had won the battle.
I hurried to pull my T-shirt over my head, then worked at the buttons on Sean's shirt. My trembling didn't make the task easy, but he didn't seem to notice my fumbling; he was too busy sliding his palms over my bare chest. I gasped at the feel of his fingers grazing my nipples. The look on his face was one of such fierce need that it made my dick pulse. I couldn't help but grin at the realization that he was beyond ready for this. For me.
I thought we might do it right there on the couch, but Sean returned my grin, and then said, "Let's go to the bedroom."
Once we were standing next to his unmade bed, he didn't bother to turn on the light, since there was still plenty of daylight left outside. Instead, he rushed to take off his button-down shirt and the undershirt he wore beneath it. I advanced upon him, kissing his mouth and neck.
Sliding a hand between my thighs, Sean let out a moan at finding me rock-hard. "How long have you wanted this?" he whispered.
"Since I first met you," I whispered back.
That revelation made his stare grow even hotter. He wasted no time stripping from the waist down, and when I finally saw his cock in all its erect glory, I couldn't suppress a whimper. "Oh, sweet Jesus, you are huge!"
A shadow of uncertainty flickered across his face. "Am I too big for you?"
"Absolutely not! That dick is going to feel incredible inside my ass." Though I was well aware that taking his monster cock would be painful at first, I still craved it. I longed to feel the searing stretch of flesh, and the subsequent fullness. I'd never had a partner, or even experimented with a toy, of Sean's size. Eagerly studying him, I saw that he wasn't overzealous in trimming his pubic hair. His balls, shaved smooth, were nice and heavy. My mouth watered at the thought of sucking each one.
By this point, I was ready to get on my hands and knees and offer Sean my tight hole, but he had other ideas. Since we were almost the same height, it was easy for him to line up his cock with my own. I felt more than a little inadequate in comparison, yet my insecurities soon faded, only to be replaced by the pleasure of Sean stroking us simultaneously. Many times in my secret, forbidden fantasies, I'd imagined the two of us frotting. And now it was actually happening!
My nearly uncontrollable excitement caused me to produce ample precum, which Sean used for lubrication. While his touch was gentle, I still got carried away, thrusting my hips in order to slide my dick against his. The room was quiet except for our heavy breathing and the whispered caress of skin on skin. Sean seemed transfixed, his gaze riveted to our cocks. When I murmured his name, he looked up as if in a trance. Again, we kissed, our tongues meeting between our lips.
"I'm so goddamn turned on right now!" he confessed. "I can't wait to fuck you."
"Please!" I begged. It was no use pretending I had any pride left.
Sean flashed a grin as he said, "I want to suck your dick first, though."