I am a plumber.  I have the crack to prove it. That and an SUV full of tools and parts. The only better job, to my mind, is writing. I do that too.

Sometimes I work for one of three landlords who between them own maybe fifty properties. One of them asked me recently to replumb a house he was remodelling.

One Saturday I was feeling particularly randy, so knowing that the landlord never comes around on a Saturday I decided to wear a glass butt plug to work. I was sat on the plug, installing a basin, when the door opened. Never mind, he won't stay long.

"Grace?"

"I'm in here."

Al appeared at the bathroom door and said, "I've done you a favour." Not good, Al's favours often wound up costing me somehow. "I've brought you a helper to do the underneath work."

Oh, crap. Most of his helpers were far from helpful, in balance. Also, I was going to have to stand up. I was wearing a dress and a butt plug, nothing else, and the plug does not always stay in place. Somehow I managed to get up without giving away my secret and follow Al into the living room.

"Grace, meet Julio."

I don't do men, but Julio was a very cute, chubby Hispanic kid, sixteen, seventeen years old. I mean really cute, and I was so fucking horny I was contemplating what I would love to do to this kid. Horny, not stupid. I knew how his mother would react to me just for thinking what I was thinking.

The moment Al left I gave the kid some make-work so I could get out of this mess.

Let me think. There was a gas station just around the corner where I could remove my plug and stuff my holes with toilet paper. Kotex would be better, but until that day I had never thought to keep anything in my glove box but knickers.

Next, back to my car, telling the kid I was going to the hardware store, and would he like a drink? Hopefully, he never noticed I went the other way to a dollar store. I bought some Kotex and extra panties and headed to the gas station again to change once more and buy some Java Monsters.

I was ever so glad that evening to get on Lush.

Hopefully, I will never again be that stupid, but if I am I will be prepared.

~`~`~

Epilog

I met him again yesterday. I was not in the same state as last time, but I still blushed with the memory.