You surely know this guilty feeling when you have to wake up early the next morning but still scrolling through your endless Instagram feed, watching YouTube videos or Twitch streams at 2am at night. It had that exact feeling, even though I was also enjoying the content. I was watching ‘@benguin’ design some game cards. A goofy name, a portmanteau of Ben and penguin. Ben is also kind of a weird person, but I really like watching him design games. I like to watch people be creative, this is the kind of streams I tend to watch on Twitch. I am not really a gamer and I feel like those chatting streams are a waste of time.

I was about to doze off as Ben ended his stream. Twitch’s algorithm did its thing and showed some stream suggestions. Those Twitch engineers really know what they are doing. The first choice of the algorithm was @PaintWithBrooke, I think I could even call myself a fan of Brooke. I really, really like her art, she has this modern expressionist style, you know, like ‘The Scream’, but influenced by everything that came after it. She also had this cute but grounded way of speaking, it is a delight to watch her work on her paintings and chat with her audience. But still, she is the kind of streamer, where you wonder if she is so popular because she is good at painting and chatting, or because she is a young, beautiful woman. All in all, I think she was my favourite streamer and one of my favourite contemporary artists.

After a short-lived faint hesitation, I convinced myself to watch Brooke for a few minutes and go to sleep after I saw what she was painting. I clicked on Brooke’s stream almost mindlessly, I was very sleepy. I quickly realised that some things were different. She had a new layout, it was a curious change. Two-thirds of the screen was still reserved for what I was used to seeing: Brooke in front of her easel, the camera was set up at exactly the right angle for us to see the painting, and Brooke could easily turn to her side to address the audience.

On the last one-third of the screen on the right, there were three boxes from top to bottom. The one on top was the video from a camera to her side. We were seeing her whole body, from head to toe. She was wearing a casual grey top, dark green jeans shorts, and black chucks. A second camera, the box in the middle, was pointed at the seat and her ass. And the third one for the box at the bottom, was recording her from her back. She looked stunning. This was the first thought I had.

With all the sleepiness, I needed some time to register what was happening. She was literally sitting on a face. You know, on a real head, on a real human. Then I realised that the title of the stream was slightly different this time, I hadn’t paid attention to this detail before I clicked on the stream.

Paint with me - with a special seat-guest

Brooke was sitting on a bench and someone was lying under her. A young man, around Brooke’s age, which also means that he was around my age.

With Brooke’s three-camera setup, we had a clear view of the sitting action. His nose was exactly in the middle of her ass, just on the middle seam. I think it wasn’t really in her ass crack, but it was not far away. He was smelling her scent with every breath for sure. If Brooke was to make a minimal shift backward, his nose would be buried deep in her ass.

I had never asked myself what it would feel like to be used like a seat cushion. Why would you even think about something like this? I never wanted to have someone sit on my face. But now, I was curious. Wouldn’t it hurt?

I realised that I didn’t have to speculate about this question. It was as easy as looking at my screen and paying attention to Brooke’s ‘seat’.

First thing that caught my attention was how comfortably Brooke seemed to be sitting on this poor face. She was almost indifferent, compared to previous streams, I couldn’t spot any differences in her behaviour, in her speech or way of painting. She was doing everything exactly the same as before. It seemed like she wasn’t doing this for the first time. I felt like it was almost too normal for her to be sitting on someone’s face.

Then I steered my attention to the seat. His nose was now pushing against her body. Brooke’s ass was completely covering his mouth and nose, she was sitting on the bottom half of his face. Even though his head was bearing the full weight of an adult woman, he also seemed to be in peace. Brooke was constantly moving on his face. She leaned forward as she put her brush on the easel and back when she wanted to inspect her work from a few centimetres away. She was lightly swaying to left and right while thinking and chatting with others. She was shifting her position continuously and trying to find the next comfortable position. Every time, her weight landed on a slightly different part of his face, his nose got effortlessly into her ass after every move. I was wondering how she could manage to use his face as a seat cushion with such skill. It was as if his face belonged under her and his nose in her ass. As if his face was supposed to be Brooke’s seat cushion.

Nevertheless, the seat quickly closed his eyes and opened them again shortly after each shift. After I inspected it carefully, I realised how he winced after each new position. I quickly came the conclusion that it did hurt to be Brooke’s seat cushion. But he has gotten used to it.

The chat was going wild with a lot of questions and accusations.

“What the fuck is happening here?”

“Why are you sitting on a man?”

“You are cruel!”

“Who is he?”

“What?!?!”

Some people in the chat wanted Brooke to give her seat a break. They war sympathising with the seat.

“Just sit on a normal chair”

“Poor guy…”

“Stop!! You are going to hurt him”

And oddly enough, some people seemed to be enjoying it, and they encouraged Brooke to continue.

“Beautiful sight”

“I wish I was him”

“I’d like to trade places”

“Sit harder, make him cry”

I could relate to most of the messages in the chat. I had my fair share of questions, I didn’t really understand what was happening. I felt sorry for the seat and worried about him. But, interestingly enough, I felt the scene very enticing. I was secretly wishing to trade places with him, just to lay down under Brooke, feel her warmth and scent on my face and let her bring her genius onto the canvas. I didn’t know that it was possible to want someone to use you casually as their chair, but it was happening to me too, just like all the others in the chat. I always thought that Brooke was beautiful, but the wish to be her seat was new to me.

As we were all going crazy, she was ignoring all the questions related to the new seating arrangement. She was painting and telling some anecdotes. She was responding to the chat, but only if the message had nothing to do with the face she was sitting on. It went on for another 10 minutes. We were all very confused.

She finished a brushstroke with a calm, deliberate motion, and then, turning to face the camera directly, she smirked.

“I see you all have questions,” she said, her voice light and playful. “Alright, I’ll answer a few, but keep it chill, okay?”

The chat exploded with even more activity. Brooke read a few messages out loud.

“What the fuck is happening here? Well as you can see, I am sitting on a friend’s face. He is my seat for this creative session."

“Why are you sitting on a man?” She was holding back a laugh. “Firstly, this is not a random man. This is a friend of mine from high school, We have known each other for a long time now. Believe it or not, he often volunteers as my seat cushion. It started as a friendly playful thing as I was still new to painting. I mean, I had been painting for a while, but we started doing this around the time I decided to take it more seriously and become a professional artist. I sit on him frequently off-camera.“ She stopped for a moment, she was trying to gather her thoughts to say something that made sense. She realised that she has only described the situation and gave some more details, but she didn’t talk about the ‘why’. “And why I do this… I don’t know. I think I got used to painting this way. You would be shocked if you knew many hours he has already spent with his nose between my butt cheeks. I can paint better when I feel his face and struggles under me. It is comforting to feel his breath in my ass. Literally, his nose is really up in there.” She laughed. “And he enjoys it too. He enjoys being a part of my creative process, he enjoys enduring my weight and breathing in my ass. This is at least what he tells me.”

The activity in the chat skyrocketed again. People were shocked and impressed at the same time.

“Wow”

“What a friend”

Some people were also sceptical: “Brooke, I don’t mean to interfere, but I am not sure if he is telling the truth about his enjoyment.”

She read the last message out loud. She got up still standing over his face.

We could see his face now. His cheeks and especially his nose were red. He looked exhausted, and his hair was messy. It seemed like he was sweating, it was probably too hot under her body. And his eyes were kind of teary. The concerned group in the chat got louder. Brooke turned around to look at his face. She was smiling.

“Okay, I admit that his face looks a bit beaten up, only slightly…” She smiled proudly, satisfied with the sight of her very own butt print on her seat’s face. “But this does not mean that he doesn’t enjoy being my personal seat cushion.” She was looking at the seat’s face as if she was expecting him to say something.

The seat cleared his throat. “Yes, guys, she is right. It does hurt a little bit, but it is nothing compared to the satisfaction I get from serving as her art chair. I genuinely like to breathe her in, to feel kind of trapped under her. And I know that my presence under her does change her artworks. I am a part of this all.”

She touched his face gently, tracing the lines of her jeans on his delicate face, she was smiling. “I’ll sit back down again. Okay? Are you ready?”

The seat nodded silently to show that he could continue. She turned around and started descending. I was fixated on his face. I couldn’t believe how excited I was about Brooke sitting down on a face. I watched her ass touch his cheeks. I witnessed his nose find its way into her ass crack. I saw how the seat winced. Even though his nose was in her ass, she wasn’t leaning back and applying pressure, so he was still able to breathe without any problems. I was hooked.

Someone was accusing her of abusing her friend: “This not a friendship, this is simply human abuse.”

Brooke didn’t like this reaction. “You don’t know us enough to arrive at such a conclusion. We have a very healthy relationship, we share a lot of other things outside of this dynamic. He is my cushion when I paint, but he is a genuine friend when I am doing anything else. And as you must have heard moments ago, he is willing to continue doing this as much as I am.”

She read another one of the messages. “You are going to hurt him.” She was annoyed but calm. “No, I’m not. This has been going on for years, hours on end, and he is doing fine.”

She also read some of the encouraging messages from the chat and laughed. “Thanks for your enthusiasm guys but I have only one seat and I am sitting on it right now!” No one was going to trade places with him, she made it clear. Funnily enough, I was disappointed.

For a short moment, I thought about the fact that I wanted to go to sleep almost thirty minutes ago. I felt stressed. But then Brooke announced that she was going to end her stream after a short game. I decided to stay till the end since the stream was going to end soon anyways.

“I am not going to paint anymore today. Since I am here with my human seat, I’d like to play a game.” The seat waved at the camera with her face still buried in her butt.

Brooke grinned mischievously. “I was thinking, why not make this more interactive?” She leaned closer to the camera, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “What if you could influence how long I stay seated here, or even what kind of position I take next?”

The chat paused for a moment, then erupted with a mixture of exclamations, questions, and new comments. Brooke continued, her voice smooth and confident.

“Let’s set up a donation system. For every $10, I’ll change my position slightly. For $50, I’ll stay seated for another five minutes. And… if someone donates $100 or more, you can suggest a specific way I should sit or adjust myself here.” She winked at the camera. “Within reason, of course.”

“We artists have to find a way to earn money and survive in this capitalist system. Your donations help.” She added.

The seat shifted slightly beneath her, but she patted his head, as if to reassure him. The chat went wild, and donations started coming in almost immediately. Brooke smiled clearly enjoying the attention and the game she’s created.

“Alright, first donation! Let’s see…” She read from the screen. “$20 from @ArtLover99 – ‘Lean back more.’” Brooke laughed, and slowly leaned back, pressing more of her weight onto her friend's face.

Her friend tensed slightly, his eyes flickering with discomfort, but he didn’t move or complain.

“Good suggestion!” she said giggling. “What’s next?”

The chat was moving even faster now, donations coming in almost too quickly to read. People were throwing out their suggestions, some playful, others bolder, and a few downright strange.

She tried some of the suggestions and finally announced, that she was going to take one last suggestion before ending the stream.

I normally have a personal rule of not donating to streamers. I think you can spend too much money that way without even realising it, and I am not sure if streamers do enough to deserve donations. But this time, I had a feeling of FOMO, fear of missing out, was I ever be able to see Brooke sit on someone’s face again? Am I going to be able to tell her how to sit? My heart started beating faster.

I decided to ignore my rules and make a donation. I was too excited to say no, and it might be my last chance.

I donated $150 with a note, my hands almost shaking out of excitement. “Cross your legs and smother him for two minutes.”

I was hoping that Brooke would see my donation and pick my suggestion. I added another $50 on top of the $100 to make it more noticeable.

And it finally happened. Brooke started to read my suggestion: “$150 from @nessuniemand - ‘Cross your legs and smother him for two minutes.’”

“Well, alright then!” Brooke chuckled, shifting her position slightly. She lifted one leg over the other, crossing them neatly at the ankles while still perched on the seat’s face. The change caused his head to tilt a little more to the side, his nose digging deeper into her. His eyes fluttered shut again, and Brooke giggled at his reaction.

“How's that? You doing okay under there?” she teased, reaching down to brush a stray lock of hair from his forehead.

"Yeah," he mumbled, his voice muffled, “I’m good. Just... a bit tighter, that’s all.”

“Now get ready for the smothering.” She warned him. She set up a timer. She shifted slightly and sat harder and made sure that she was blocking his breathing.

He was calm at the beginning but started to move as we were approaching the one-minute mark. She was not reacting to his panic reaction physically but said that he has to endure for another minute since it was what the chat wanted. We heard muffled words from beneath her but nobody understood what he was trying to say.

His struggles got more violent with time. Brooke was saying “Shhh” the whole time. As we were approaching two minutes, he was literally jumping on the bench with his legs, but his upper body stayed pinned down to the bench by Brooke’s weight. Brooke was laughing.

The timer was up and Brooke got up and sat down onto his chest. We were seeing the seat’s red, beaten-up face once again. It was way worse this time. He was also gasping for air, he was breathing desperately. I felt a pang of guilt because I was the reason he had to go through this. The guilt left its place to satisfaction after his breathing turned back to normal and he started to smile subtly. Brooke looked happy too.

She once again turned around to look at her friend. “Thanks for going through with this plan,” she sounded genuinely grateful.

“It was fun for me too,” he responded.

The chat was overwhelmingly positive, a lot of people were talking about how much they liked today’s stream. “We want to have the seat-guest more often.” They wrote.

“Thanks for joining us today! I enjoyed it very much with you all. The next stream will be in two days as scheduled.” Brooke looked into the camera lens and addressed the audience directly. Brooke and her friend both waved at the camera and the stream ended.

I put my phone aside and looked up at the ceiling trying to process what has happened and what I have done. I couldn’t believe that I was still so excited because of what happened. I was wishing to be an artist’s seat too, I would like to be Brooke’s chair. I thought about how lucky her friend is, and how lucky the chairs she sits on are, in general.

For the first time in my life, I realised, how lucky the chairs, couches, bike seats, and all other seats are, when a young beautiful woman sits on them. A woman’s seat has a beautiful and meaningful existence.

These thoughts were crazy for me, my own desires were weird to me.

I smoothly transitioned into sleep as I was imagining being the seat of a friend of mine. She is an author and not a painter, but that would work too…