After I moved from my home country to Scotland at seventeen years old and started working at a high street retailer. I soon found myself attracted to the lingerie department, especially panties. I would secretly try some on as I really loved how I felt. This obsession carried on through my life, including my failed marriages. I was never caught, but I had a few close calls. Fast forward to 2020, my last marriage failed, and I am now living on my own in a shared house. I have a large furnished en-suite room and only share the kitchen.
I am not sure how it started, but after a short while, I found myself buying some panties and wearing them under my jeans when I went out. I then progressed to buying some bras. This carried on until I had a few different sets of lingerie that I would wear to bed. Then the urge to buy stockings and suspender belts came over me followed by getting some dresses a wig and shoes. I would dress most evenings when indoors and loved how I felt. but something still was missing. I wanted to go out dressed but didn't have the nerve to. I would get dressed without any idea where I wanted to go but would change my mind at the last minute. This went on for a few weeks until one evening I googled crossdressing/trans clubs in London, (I live an hour's drive from there), and I found one that had recently reopened after lockdown on Saturday nights. I decided that the following Saturday I would go there no matter what.
Come the Saturday evening, and I am dressed in and, in my car. I am wearing a Burgandy lace dress, sexy red lingerie complete with a suspender belt with sheer stockings and three-inch chunky heels red shoes. It was such a thrill driving when dressed, I was feeling so excited by the whole thing, and cursing myself for not doing this earlier.
I found the multi-story car park around the corner from the club parked and set off. This was my first experience of being in public dressed as Josephine and I was extremely nervous. Now I had to walk along the pavement and mix with other people and just wasn't sure what would happen.
I eventually got to the club after a fifteen-minute walk, and no one had said anything to me on the way, which was a relief. However, as I hadn't read the information on the club's website correctly, I missed the part where it said it only opened every other weekend and that it was closed.
I felt devastated as I walked back to the car park and really upset. My feet were hurting slightly in the shoes as they were new which added to my discomfort. Back in the car park, there was more trouble, as the payment machine was broken which meant I had to join a queue of people at the office to pay. My head was all over the place at this point, but as it turned out I was worrying unnecessary, as the reality was that no one actually cared how I was dressed. Though I was very happy when a couple of different people passed comments on how nice I looked, and this helped boost my confidence a lot.
Now back in the car wondering what to do, I googled once again for trans clubs and found one a fifteen-minute drive from where I was, so I headed there. Still very nervous. I found the place and parked on the street nearby, and once again I was walking with other people on the street. When I went into the reception the hostess was there and she could spot I was nervous and when I said this was my first night out dressed as Josephine she came round and gave me a big hug, then showed me around the club, where the different play areas were and such like. She really made me feel very welcome and comfortable. I was with people who didn't judge me but accepted me as Josephine.