I’m not a very masculine guy. In fact, I’m downright girly. I blame my body. I’m 5’3” and weigh 110lbs, but the first thing people notice is my fat ass. It’s fat, tight, and juicy. It’s the kind of ass that women these days pay a queen’s ransom for. It flares out with my wide hips from a narrow waist and flat stomach and is complemented by proportionally thick thighs. My calves are well-defined, my ankles thin and delicate, as is my upper body. Other than my ass and thighs, the only fat on me is on my chest (of course). I certainly don’t have back-breakingly large tits, but I can fill out an A-cup, a fun fact I know thanks to a high school girlfriend.

My big ass, hips, and thighs make my 3-inch cocklet look even smaller than it already does. My wife Amy loves it, probably because she’s never had another. She affectionately calls it my clit. I blush every time she says it, but it never fails to turn me on.

On this particular day, I was curled up on the couch watching Great British Bake-Off. It was the end of an episode, and I was crying, as you do. Even though it was winter, it was warm in the house. I had on an old t-shirt, which had shrunk to just above my navel, and some old sweatpants. The shirt was thin and gauzey with lots of holes in it. Normally I pull my pants up past my belly button, since that’s the only way to keep a big ass covered, but since I was home and not expecting company, I didn’t bother. I had pulled my knees up to my chest, exposing the small of my back, and my sweatpants were riding low, exposing the pink thong I was wearing.

My wife had accidentally thrown out all of my underwear earlier that day when she was getting rid of some rags, so I was borrowing some of hers until we could get me some. In fact, she was supposed to be doing just that as I lay on the couch and hugged my knees and felt the silk material rub my little boi clit and my pretty pink boi pussy. I felt very sexy.

I could hear Amy laughing outside as she walked up the front walkway. She got to the door and suddenly the laughing stopped. I heard her squeal.

“OH! Mmm oh my goddd … hnggg”

A few minutes later she opened the door and stood there with Joe, an asshole that has bullied me since high school.

“Hey honey,” she said. I scrambled to stand up and pull my pants up. I did it so fast that I pulled my sweatpants hard into my asscrack. I had to stifle a moan.

“Hi honey, everything okay? It sounded like you were startled out on the porch,” I said. I cast a furtive glance to Joe as my face flushed. He was tall, muscular, handsome, and a total dick. In short, he was my exact opposite.

In high school, he stuck it in every girl who would let him, and most of them did. The girls at our school gave him the nickname “Wrecking Ball”. I never really understood what that meant. He hadn’t grown up much since. He and my wife had become good friends, and I had no earthly idea why.

“Oh hi sweetie, yeah, umm…”

“Amy saw something big out on the porch,” Joe said with a smirk. God, he’s such a smug asshole.

“Uhh..” Amy’s eyes looked panicked. “A moth! A really big moth! Yeah, that’s what I saw.”

“Oh wow, how big was it?” I said.

Amy locked eyes with Joe as she said in a low and sultry voice, “It was huge. The biggest I’ve ever seen.”

Then they both burst out laughing. Amy slapped Joe on the chest as she laughed and walked past him.

“I’m gonna go freshen up honey. I’ll meet you upstairs later.” I knew this was my cue to leave the two of them alone. They had a special bond, as Amy had told me repeatedly when I objected to how much time they spent together. She said she didn’t know the reason why they were so naturally close, but whatever it was, it was massive.

Amy made her exit to the downstairs bathroom, and I started to head upstairs. As I passed by Joe, he grabbed my arm and said, “Whoah, hold up, baby girl.” He always called me that. I hated it. “Grab me a beer, will ya?”

I rolled my eyes. This guy was such an asshole. He’d been to our house dozens of times. He knew where the beer was. He just enjoyed bossing me around.

“Fine,” I said. He smirked. My exasperation only entertained him more, seemingly.

“Thanks, baby girl,” he said, squeezing my non-existent bicep. I swear that man’s face is permanently sneering.

I went into the kitchen and opened the fridge. God, the cold air felt good. I hadn’t even noticed how flushed I’d become.

As I stared into the fridge looking for beer, my puffy nipples hardened under the holey, gauzey material of the old t-shirt. My wardrobe seemed to have changed recently. I know my wife had recently given a bunch of clothes to Goodwill, but I would have thought this t-shirt would have been a natural choice to give away.

Come to think of it, some of my newer clothes had gone in the donation bin but a bunch of old ones stayed. Not all of my new clothes, mind you. And some of my old ones had gone. But my ultra-comfy, lay-around-the-house clothes were now all the clothes of a randy slut who spends all day taking booty pics for Instagram and waiting to get fucked.

My little boi clit was stirring in my panties. Thankfully, if it got out of control, I could secure my little guy in the waistband of my panties, since I’m only 3 inches fully engorged.

I fished a beer out of the fridge, walked back to the living room, and handed it to Joe.

“Aren’t you forgetting something?”

“Umm, no?”

“You forgot to take the cap off.”

“Seriously? Uggh.” I was so over this guy, although, in all fairness, it was an import and not a twist-off. Luckily I was an experienced barmaid from my college days, so I went over to the fireplace to use the brick mantle as leverage to open it. As I brought my hand down on the top of the bottle to open it, I must have agitated it too much, because the cap came off and the beer exploded all over my face and chest.

“Ha ha ha! Oh my god, what a fucking clutz you are!” This was the last thing I wanted to have happen in front of Joe. All of the blood in my body rushed to my cheeks, and my clit.

“FUCK! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.”

“You’ve got a filthy mouth for such a dainty little thing, baby girl,” Joe said, enjoying this way too much.

“Fuck you. Well, I guess you want another one?” As much as I hated him, I found his demands… Irresistible. He some weird power over me that I didn’t understand.

“It’s fine, give it here.”

I walked over and handed it to him. He looked me up and down.

“Mmm, mmm,” he said, shaking his head. I couldn’t quite tell what he was on about.

He took a sip of the beer and as he lowered it, it erupted again, getting all over his shorts and the couch.

“Whoah! Looks like this one’s a squirter!!” he said. I laughed, he laughed. We laughed together briefly. I hated him, but I had to admit it was funny.

“Let me get something to clean that couch up, you perv,” I said and went back to the kitchen. I got some paper towels and came back. Surprisingly, his shorts were almost dry. I don’t know why, but I felt a slight twinge of disappointment.

I stopped to give him a look. He was tan, with brown hair, blue eyes, and perfectly sculpted muscles.

“Your shorts look almost dry already!” I said, more breathless than I should have been.

“Dri-fit,” he said. “Works like a champ!”

I walked over to the couch where he was sitting and knelt down so I could wipe up the several spots on the couch.

“Do you need me to move?” he asked.

“No, you’re fine,” I said. That word “fine” echoed in my head as I sopped up the spill. “But could you lift your leg please?” His legs, which could more accurately be called tree trunks, since they were the size of my waist, were resting on the coffee table.

“Sure.” He lifted his leg up, and I had assumed he would keep it in the air till I was done, since it would only be a few seconds, but instead he moved it over my head and placed it on the coffee table on the other side of me. I was now trapped between his legs. I figured I better clean up and get upstairs before Amy catches me like this.

There were several spots, but I focused on the biggest one. I started wiping it in a circular motion with the paper towel, getting closer and closer to his crotch. My heart started thumping in my chest when I saw a twitch in his shorts and realized that what I thought was his leg muscle was actually his massive cock.

“It’s a big one, isn’t it?” he said. My throat went dry. Was he reading my mind?

“Huh?” I said as I looked up at him. I could feel a wet spot forming on my sweatpants. What little hair I had on my body was standing on end. It felt like I had 10,000 volts surging through me. Joe was as cool as a cucumber. A long, fat, juicy cucumber.

“That spot. It’s big, isn’t it?” I couldn’t look away from his eyes. I was transfixed. I was completely mesmerized by this bully who had somehow wormed his way into my brain and was making me think and feel things I never thought possible.

“Yeah,” I mewled.

“Is it the biggest you’ve ever seen?”

“Yeah…”

We looked at each other. He was unmoving, unflinching, totally in control. I suddenly became aware of every inch of my body. I must have looked a sight. I was on my knees, my t-shirt soaking wet, nipples hard and puffy, poking out lewdly from the wet, gauzy material. My boi clit was leaking pre-cum onto my sweatpants. In my haste to clean up the spill, the back of my sweatpants had ridden down, exposing my pink thong and fat, juicy buns. I was a mess. A slutty, horny mess.

“Well, you better get up there before Amy comes back. You know how she gets.”

“Yeah…” He lifted his leg and I got up slowly, as if in a trance. I didn’t want to leave. I took a few steps and turned to face him. I looked down at my shirt. There was really no point in keeping it on. I took it off and absently dropped it on the floor. I arched my back and lifted my arms up, stretching high in the air. I brought my arms down and touched my chest to see how sticky it was as I rubbed my wet nipples. God, my nipples were on fire. Jolts of electricity made me flinch every time I touched one.

Suddenly I remembered I had an audience. I looked up at Joe and his eyes were fixed on me, boring a hole in my body. I felt like a young fawn being stared down by a hungry wolf.

My cheeks flushed, again, as if they hadn’t already reached maximum flushness. I instinctively covered my chest as Amy came out of the bathroom.

“Sweetie, what are you doing down here?”

“I… Umm… Uh…”

“I wanted a beer and little precious here was kind enough to bring me one.” Little Precious. Where was this coming from? Why couldn’t I get his cock out of my head?

Because that’s where beautiful cocks belong, in my head, in my slutty mouth, filling my brain case up with cum, because that’s what bimbo sluts like me deserve.

“Unfortunately the beer kind of…” He made a jerking off motion and then raised his hand, imitating the exploding beer. All I could think about was him sitting there stroking his massive tool and staring me down with that penetrating, controlling leer. Just knowing that my sexy little body was causing that massive thing to fill with blood and rise up like an angry serpent…. Why was he tormenting me like this?

“Well, get going, slut, I don’t need any competition!” Amy said. My cheeks again flushed in embarrassment. She slapped my ass as I walked by. I wished it had been Joe’s hand.

I went upstairs to our bedroom, my mind racing, my poor little clitty aching and leaking. I needed relief. If I was going to masturbate, I’d need to wash my hands first. I looked around--no soap?? What the hell was happening? Was I in bizarro world? And where were the hand towels? Fuck. Well, fine. I’ll just get some lube. It’ll be messy, but it’ll get the job done. I knew Amy kept some around, now to find it. I searched through every drawer in the bathroom. They were all empty. This was very weird. They’d been full that morning. Same with the cupboards under the sink, the medicine cabinet.

I was starting to panic. All I could think about was Joe’s cock, his smell, the way I’d felt when he stared at me with pure lust in his eyes. This wasn’t just going to go away. I needed to cum badly.

I went to my wife’s nightstand and opened the top drawer. What I saw there made my knees buckle. There was a bottle of lube. And next to it was the biggest, reddest, veiniest dildo I’ve ever seen. I collapsed onto the floor, my breath quick and raspy, my cocklet in such unimaginable pain.

I couldn’t stand up. I reach up and felt around in the drawer and grabbed the most beautiful instrument I’ve ever seen.

For a second, all I could do was stare at it. The circumcised head was massive, and it had a slight upward curve to it. I started to kiss it up and down the length, slowly and tenderly at first, then faster and faster, eventually licking it all over, my mouth drooling like a well-fucked pussy.

Then I started sucking on the head like a lollipop, just the tip at first, but eventually more and more, figuring I’d stop when I hit my gag reflex. Well it kept going in and in and eventually it was in up to the hilt, and still no gagging. It was the strangest and most wonderful feeling, like my throat was made for swallowing cock. I thrust it in and out for a while, imagining Joe fucking my pretty little face without mercy.

Eventually, I got impatient and, still wobbly and unable to stand, reached up for the lube and spread it all over this glorious dong. My ass was already hanging out of my sweatpants, so all I had to do was pull aside my thong. I put some lube on my fingers and began working it into my asshole.

“Ohhh!” I moaned loudly as I finger blasted myself. I laid down on my side, pulled my knees up to my chest, and positioned my future, my destiny, the thing I’d wanted for so long without knowing it, at the entrance to my clean, pink boi pussy. I pushed it in, and this beautiful pain stick began piercing slowly up my bum. I winced at the sharp pain, until halfway up when I felt the jolt.

Every muscle in my body tensed, my boi clit got harder than it had ever been, and I shot the most massive load of hot, sticky cum I’ve ever shot in my life. For thirty seconds my cocklet pulsated and I squirted and squirted and squirted. I shoved the whole thing up my boi pussy, exploded one last time, and saw stars as I passed out.

I woke up to my wife spooning me and stroking my arm as she whispered in my ear.

“Hey baby girl, looks like you met Little Joey.”

“Hmm?” I was still cock drunk and half asleep.

“Let’s get you cleaned up, sweetie.” She started to pull the giant dong out of me.

“Mmm no please I need it unngggh…” God, it wrecked me on the way out too. She pulled it out slowly, kissing my neck and my ears, whispering to me all the while.

“Aww baby girl, you can’t have cock in you all the time. You have to give your little pussy a chance to recover.”

“Mmm unggg it’s so good.”

“I know baby, I know. And this is just a dildo. Wait till you try the real thing.” She started stroking my clitty. “Does your little cocklet feel good, baby?”

“Mmm hmm.” I was still in a daze.

“You want to show it to Joe, don’t you?”

“Oh! Hnggg unggg.” My clit exploded in her hand, less than before, but still harder and longer than I could remember cumming before that night.

“Such a dirty little slut. Well, you might just get a chance, baby. He’s moving in next week.”