On July 15, 2015 my life was turned upside down. I just didn’t know it at the time. Looking back, I was like so many others caught in the middle-class grind with a demanding job, family life, a house in the suburbs, and the hefty mortgage to go with it. It would appear by world standards that I was living the American dream, or so I thought at the time.
When I made the decision to become self-employed, I had no idea how demanding that would become. As the business started to grow, it seemed like every moment was accounted for between my work and family obligations. Janice was as busy as I was with her teaching, being a mother, and maintaining our home.
It didn’t take long before we found ourselves living life through our pocket planners. Weekdays were consumed by business responsibilities and the weekends were packed with chores and family commitments. What little romance remained did not survive the onslaught of our demanding work schedules. Needless to say, this was a recipe for disaster. Our love life was practically nonexistent and on life support. It wasn’t that we didn’t need each other… life just seemed to swallow us up. This last year we’d given each other enough rain checks in the bedroom to fill the Pacific Ocean.
Speaking from experience, I don’t believe people suddenly find themselves stuck in a rut; they actually dig it themselves, one boring scoop at a time. As for me, I had always found a sense of security in having a daily routine. It made everything more predictable and easier to manage. I considered spontaneous living was a luxury for singles and those with little ambition. Success on the other hand, demands strong discipline, sacrifice, and careful planning.
I remember it was on my thirty-fourth birthday, I was sitting at Subway treating myself to a foot-long Meatball Marinara and reading The Wall Street Journal, when a deep voice pulled me out of my culinary trance.
“Ricky? Is that you? Damnit, it is!... Remember me?”
It took me a couple seconds to place the voice with the face, but sure enough it was my old college roommate.
“Jason!” I smiled, standing up. “Wow! This is a surprise! Why don’t you sit down and join me?”
“I’d be delighted to.” He placed his tray on the table and pulled up a chair.
“So, what brings you to California?” I asked.
“Business. I just relocated here from Houston a few months ago. I’m now working at Andorra Marketing as a sales rep. What about you?”
“I’m a self-employed CPA. My office is just across the street.”
He looked out the window at my building and said, “That’s great, dude. I always knew you’d be successful. How long has it been since we last saw each other… ten years?”
“Actually, nine years and two months—but who’s counting?”
Jason laughed. “Damn, Ricky…” He smiled and gave me a long look. “You haven’t changed a lick since college! You’re exactly as I remember you.”
“Thanks. I can say the same about you.”
At fifteen pounds heavier, I knew he was just being kind to me. However, Jason actually did look exactly the same, except for a bit of premature graying at the temples. I wondered what his secret was. From what I could tell through his tailored suit, he maintained himself well.
In college we were polar opposites. I was a serious focused student, and he was the stereotypical jock looking to party. I always suspected his football scholarship and his father’s generous donation to the university had something to do with him receiving a degree. It certainly wasn’t his study habits, which as I recalled seemed almost nonexistent at the time.
He looked at my ring finger and asked, “How long you been married?”
“Almost eight years now. We also have a six-year-old daughter. How about you? Did you ever get married?”
“Married? Me? Hell no! There is way too much pussy out there to limit myself.”
A lady walking by heard his declaration and gave him a grin. He smiled back at her.
“Speaking of pussy, I see you’re reading about that Ashley Madison hack.” He pointed to the front-page article.
“Yeah, I was just starting to read it. That whole situation seems crazy. It says the hackers released tens of thousands and possibly millions of names and photos.”
Jason nodded. “It appears there’s gonna be a lot of explaining to do for a whole lot of cheaters.”
"I imagine the divorce lawyers will be working overtime. What could they be thinking of, taking such a huge risk?” I said.
“Actually, don’t knock it until you try it. I find married pussy to be a very fine delicacy.”
“A delicacy? What do you mean?”
“Well, single chicks usually have an agenda, but with a cheating wife there is no chance they are going to make more out of it than what it is. Plus… most of them feel so damn grateful for the attention, they actually attempt to fuck me to death.” He laughed.
“Don’t you ever feel badly for interfering in their marriage?”
“Fuck no! I’m doing them a favor—probably saving their marriage.”
“You almost make this sound like a noble thing, Jason. Then again… you were always able to spin bullshit into fine linen.”
He laughed and replied, “Hey, we all have our gifts! Yours is crunching numbers and mine is… well—more relational.”
“What about the husbands? Don’t you ever worry they might find out and come after you with a gun?”
“That’s the real kicker. Many of them know about it. Some even want to watch. Like I said, I’m doing them a favor.”
“That’s unbelievable. I’m assuming you must do this a lot?”
“I used to in Texas but not since I moved here. I needed to get an apartment and establish myself first. Most of the time I use Tinder for quick hookups, but I signed up for ‘Ashley’ the first week I moved here. I looked through all the local offerings and you wouldn’t believe who I discovered.”
“I wouldn’t have a clue. I’m a happily married man.”
“Good for you, Rick. Anyway, do you remember that tall redhead with the big boobs you had a thing for back in college? The one that wouldn’t give you the time of day?”
“Yes… I remember her very well.”
“You might be interested to know she’s on Ashley Madison. I sent her an invitation to meet me for a little extra curricular fun.” He grinned.
“Oh? How can you be sure it’s her after all these years?”
“It’s a gift. I never forget a face… or tits. Let’s just say I’m gonna tap that real soon. She sent me back a short reply and a private pic. I think she’s actually better looking now than I recall her being in college.”
“Really?”
“Yep. Hey, buddy, I have to get back to work. I can’t be late for my new job. Here’s my number. How about we get together and shoot the shit sometime?” He dropped his business card on the table.
“That would be great,” I replied as he walked away.
I sat there dumbfounded by his revelation. Yes, I did remember the tall redhead with the big tits… I married her.
-oOo-
The rest of my day was shot. There was no way I could concentrate on the work in front of me. Janice’s beautiful face stared at me from our wedding photo sitting on my desk. Surely it couldn’t be my wife he was talking about. There must have been hundreds if not thousands of redheads on that site.
Hours passed by and I continued to struggle with my work, unable to concentrate. What I really wanted was to hop online and check out Ashley Madison, but it felt like a betrayal of my trust for Janice if I did. An internal battle raged within me for hours before I finally gave in to my curiosity and logged on.
As soon as the Ashley Madison home page appeared, it became apparent that it required a paid membership to access any of the files. Glaring at me was the opening introduction that stated: Life is short. Have an affair.
I wasn’t about to give this cheaters site my hard-earned money, especially with a traceable credit card. At first, I had no plan what to do. But then I had an idea. Taking out Jason’s business card, I punched in the numbers in my phone. The automated answering machine picked up and gave me the usual options. I selected zero for the operator.
“Andorra marketing and sales. How may I direct your call?”
“Jason Andrew please.”
“Whom may I say is calling?”
“Richard Hamilton from R-H Accounting Services.”
“One moment please.”
After a pause, Jason answered.
“Ricky! Hey, long time no see. What’s up?”
“Nothing really important. I was just curious about the redhead you mentioned.”
“You always had a thing for her, didn’t you?” He chuckled.
“Yeah, I guess I still do. I was wondering if you could do me a favor?”
“Sure, anything. I still owe you for writing that term paper for me in my Statistics class.”
“I tried logging on to that site, but it required an account. I was wondering if you might let me use your login ID and password? I promise I won’t abuse the privilege. It’s just that since we talked, I became more curious about her.”
“Sure, no problem, you old dog. I can’t blame you for still having the hots for red. I don’t mind sharing but remember she’s mine first. You don’t mind sloppy seconds, do you?”
“Uh… I’m not sure about that.”
He laughed. “I’ll text you the info. What do you say about Saturday for beers?”
“Thanks for the offer but it depends on what time. I’ve got T-Ball practice in the morning until noon.”
“Damn, you really are married, aren’t you?”
“Yep, that’s me—really married.”
For the time being, I thought.
“Okay, how about two o’clock at Western Inn by your work? By then we might be able to compare notes.”
“I’ll see you then.” My heart ached at the thought.
About five minutes after our conversation, my phone beeped with a message. The text was in bold letters.
login: JockCock9
Password: Icum4u2
I typed it in and the program opened. I wasn’t emotionally prepared for this. Jason’s inbox had several inquiries. The one that caught my attention was from RedhotWife. When I clicked on her profile, I choked on my coffee. There… as plain as day… was a photo of my wife in her bikini. It was a picture I’d taken during our Hawaii trip. In this pose, her face was turned away, but it showed plenty of side boob. I also knew it was her by the little heart tattoo on her shoulder.
I remembered one of the very rare fights we’d had after she revealed that tat to me. She knew how I felt about body ink and piercings, but she asked my honest opinion anyway. I made the huge mistake of telling her the truth. That had to be one of the dumbest things I had ever done in all our years together. I regretted it instantly as she stormed off, refusing to talk to me for several days. It was only after I begged and bought her enough flowers to make our house look like a funeral home that she finally forgave me.
As I began to read her profile, tears welled up in my eyes. It suddenly struck me that I might’ve been viewing more than a picture of my wife. I was quite possibly witnessing the end of our marriage. The pain I felt was indescribable. I sat for the longest time contemplating my dismal future.
After regaining some of my composure, I read further on. She used the name “Misty.” The profile listed statistics first and then gave a brief introduction. One thing that immediately stood out to me was the date she had joined: it was less than a month ago, which was confirmed again in her opening paragraph.
She wrote that she was new on the site, then went on to reveal that she wanted to explore her submissive side… “restraint, light pain, and possibly anal sex.” What struck me the most was her hypocrisy; she’d specifically said in the past that these were all off limits. Who was this woman? Strangely, at the end she made it clear she was happily married and not looking for anything but sex.
I read Jason’s text conversation with “Misty” from yesterday:
Jason: Hey beautiful, what’s up?
Misty: Hey yourself.
Jason: I love your profile pic! How about one showing me a bit more skin?
Misty: Sorry. Can’t risk the exposure. The one pic will have to do.
Jason: I read your profile. Look at mine. The photos are all me. Do I fill the bill?
Misty: Ummm. You look very nice.
Jason: Nice??? I bet your husband isn’t hung like me, is he?
Misty: Actually, he is but please leave my husband out of this. This is about me, not him.
Jason: Well, if your hubby was taking care of business you wouldn’t be here would you? I don’t give a rat’s ass about your husband. It’s you I want. How about we meet at Starbucks on main and take it from there? No pressure.
Misty: I don’t know. Maybe. I’ve never done this before.
Jason: You’ve never been fucked before?
Misty: Don’t be silly. You know what I mean. I mean I’ve never cheated. I will let u know.
I need time to think.
Jason: Look doll, it’s not a date. It’s only sex. We can use my apartment. It needs to be
christened anyway.
Misty: I’ll think about it. I have a very, very tight schedule.
Jason: When I’m finished with you, you won’t be tight anymore. lol
Misty: I’ve got a daughter. How do you know I’m not loose as an old sock?
Jason: All I want is to find out. That’s the fun of it.
Misty: We’ll see. I’ll get back to you. Bye.
She sent him one of the private photos I’d taken of her kneeling on our bed, completely nude with her hair covering her one breast—the other tit fully exposed. In this picture her face showed. My heart sunk to my gut.
What the hell is she doing risking our marriage and family?
At this point I was too numb to be angry. Immediately I started assessing what possibly had driven her to this.
I took a few more minutes to view Jason’s pictures. He must have really been narcissistic to have posted that many photos of himself. At first glance I noticed that he was fit. In fact, with his killer abs and bulging biceps, I could see why he attracted so many women. I was no slouch, physically, but my workout routine suffered greatly since I’d started my business.
I could look no further and closed the laptop. With the fact that my wife was looking elsewhere, my ego had suffered a serious blow. The rest of my day was wasted. What Jason had said had cut to the core. He was right about one thing, though: I had been neglectful of Jan’s needs. However, I also felt it was not too late. I needed a plan because I wasn’t going to go down without a fight. Surprisingly, I had no issue with Jason. He was simply doing what came natural to him. This was about my wife and our marriage. It was obvious if it hadn’t been him, it would have been someone else.
-oOo-
After I pulled into the driveway, I sat there in the car contemplating what I was going to say to my wife. My heart and soul ached. From what I knew she had not done anything yet; but the intent to cheat was there. Knowing Jan so well, I knew any sort of verbal confrontation wasn’t my wisest move—that would just draw lines. I wished she would have said something to me. We always seemed to find a solution to most things. This last year had been difficult on both of us. Admittedly the business soaked up most of my energy. It occurred to me as I sat there that I couldn’t remember the last time we made love.
I thought back to our earliest beginnings. The first time I saw her was when I was a junior. At first glance I knew she was way out of my league. Whenever I saw her on campus, she was usually with some guy that looked like a rock star. He had a strong square jaw, a slim, well-toned physique, long hair, and a gleaming white smile. I didn’t have the confidence to approach her, so I just admired her from a distance.
However, whenever she caught me staring at her—which was frequently, she would smile back at me. That was something that didn’t escape my roommate Jason. He would kid me about my red hair fetish. I assured him it wasn’t only the long, lush red hair; she was put together like playmate of the month.
It wasn’t until grad school that we said more than hello. At the time I was working as student teacher in the accounting department. For my time and service, the university paid my tuition. I was also able to earn extra income by tutoring other students.
I remember sitting in the professor’s office, grading midterms when Janice walked in. I sat there almost paralyzed as she stood in front of me. Words seemed reluctant to escape my lips.
“H-hi. Is there anything I might do to—I mean, for you?” I asked, shuddering like a moron.
“Yes, I think so. Are you Richard Hamilton?” Her smile was full of confidence.
“Yes, that’s me, but I prefer Ricky.”
“Well, Ricky, my student aid package allows me three months of tutoring and you come highly recommended. You do tutoring in business math, right?”
It was as if God had taken pity on me. My good fortune must have shown in my face as I exuberantly replied, “When would you like to start?”
“We haven’t even discussed your fees yet.” She giggled.
“Whatever you can afford is fine with me. Our schedules are more important. I have only evenings available right now.”
“I live off campus. We can meet there if you want. I just study most nights anyway.”
“Um… what about your boyfriend?”
“What on earth are you talking about? I live alone.”
“Sorry, I always saw you with a tall blond guy. I just assumed…”
She laughed at my suggestion. “Frederick? Oh my God! That’s hilarious.”
Now I really felt clueless. The best I could do was look confused.
“You really don’t know, do you?” she said.
“Know what?”
“Freddy is the biggest gay rights advocate on campus. Where have you been?”
“Pretty much locked up in my room studying or working for the professor. I honestly don’t get out much. Every time I saw you, it seemed you were with… Freddy.”
“And all this time I was thinking a guy like you didn’t talk to me because you were in a committed relationship.”
“Guy like me? What do you mean?”
“Are you serious? You really don’t know how handsome you are?”
“Me?”
“Oh my God! You’ve got the killer three!”
“Killer three?”
“Good looks, intelligence, and… humble.”
I blushed, never being one to take a compliment. I stared in her perfect face, probably looking like a dumb-ass, but I felt like I’d just won the lottery… twice. I had no clue how to respond. Then Janice reached out and pulled me to my feet.
“Come on, big boy. Follow me.”
“Where?” I asked, being dragged toward the door.
“You’re taking me to dinner.”
“Is that so?”
“Ricky, we’d be old and gray before you’d ask. I hope you’ve got your credit card. I’m hungry.”
And so that started our epic romance. I found out quickly she didn’t need tutoring any more than I did, but we continued to meet twice a week, until her scholarship benefit ran out. We still hadn’t even kissed at that point. It was during our second to last meeting that we sat at the table, quietly looking in each other’s eyes. It was almost as if we were telepathic, if only in that moment. Without spoken words, we leaned across the table over the books and our lips met for the first time.
I knew she was special from the moment I laid eyes on her. That first kiss was magical, just like in the movies, and it cemented our relationship as exclusive. She still insisted even today that I was the only guy for her from the moment she saw me. I wanted to believe that, even after her apparent betrayal on that stupid cheating site.
I knew Janice had many relationships before me. Unfortunately, my sexual history—or lack of it, included only her. t seemed natural for her to take the lead sexually. My inexperience showed greatly with her choreographing my every move. However, I was a determined and enthusiastic student. Sex oozed from every pore of her luscious body.
In those days, it was Jan that initiated sex between us. For a guy with a Post Graduate education, I was clueless about almost anything that did not involve numbers or equations.
I remember our first time together. It was on our last scheduled tutor meeting that she greeted me at the door with hot-lips that could melt titanium. She excused herself as I set the table for the Chinese takeout I had brought. She occupied my thoughts day and night, and my life seemed empty when we were apart.
“Thanks for bringing dinner, sweetheart,” she said softly, standing behind me. “But I will be providing dessert tonight.”
As I turned, she was completely naked in all her glory, wearing nothing but a smile. I dropped the noodles on the floor. We skipped the main course and went directly for the dessert. I wish I could say it was a masterful moment for me, but it was pretty much what you would expect from a twenty-two-year-old virgin, fumbling around for the first time. What I do remember is that she was patient and loving. I didn’t need to tell her I was a virgin, she knew. Now it was her turn to tutor me.
Her beauty that night was indescribable—like trying to describe a stunning sunset to a blind man. Her form was lit by the full moon glowing through the bedroom curtains. That scene would be etched in my mind forever.
Janice was tall, at five nine in her bare feet, and her legs were long and shapely. Her alabaster skin was slightly freckled, as to be expected for a natural redhead. I don’t know why but her lush auburn hair, full sensual lips, and green eyes reminded me of the character Ariel in The Little Mermaid. Her smile was stunning, captivating me… and those magnificent breasts… Gawd, those magnificent breasts were in a category of their own, perfect in every way.
Jan had a little smirk on her face, seeing my reaction. I couldn’t remember what I’d said, if anything; but as I approached, she pulled me toward her. Like a lioness, she was not to be denied. She grabbed hold of my shirt and aggressively ripped it open with buttons flying.
This was to be a night of firsts for me. The first time my cock slid into her was a sensation I had never even dreamed could feel so incredible. I of course lasted about a microsecond before eruption, but she was patient with me. It got better with practice and we practiced a lot from that day on. The memories of that first night were embedded in my mind and written on my heart forever.
We skipped school the next day, but my education began in earnest. During the next year I became familiar with every square inch of that magnificent body. She was like a drug to me and I was addicted.
Besides the sex, we were compatible in almost every way. As we neared graduation, I could tell she was getting impatient with the status quo. One evening at supper she asked bluntly, “Are you ever going to ask me to marry you or am I going to die an old maid?”
With that little nudge, I asked her to marry me. The next day we picked out rings that I couldn’t afford, and they became my very first credit card debt. Right away I discovered marriage was on the payment plan.
The wedding planning was a nightmare because our mothers couldn’t agree on anything. It only came under control after we threatened to elope to Vegas. Ultimately, Janice was the most beautiful bride ever and her wedding court looked like they were all sports illustrated models. However, as great as the wedding was, our honeymoon in Hawaii was spectacular. That was when I discovered I had a jealous side. Her tiny bikini was like a magnet, drawing guys to her like ants to peanut butter. At first, I was insane with jealousy, but after a few days I came to realize I had nothing to worry about. I was secure in her love.
-oOo-
Suddenly, there was a rapping on my driver’s window that woke me up from my nostalgic trip.
“Are you coming inside?” Janice asked. “Dinner is almost ready.”
“Yes, I’ll be right there. I just had some things on my mind.”
She waited until I stepped out of the car and gave me a big hug and kiss.
“Wow!” I exclaimed. “What brought that on? What are the neighbors going to think?”
“They’re going to think I love my husband and he’s going to get really lucky tonight.”
I patted her butt and said, “What’s got you revved up?”
“I don’t need a reason to want some loving from my husband.”
She flipped up her skirt, flashing her butt as we walked in the house. The moment I stepped inside, Kimber ran at me, screaming, “Daddy! Daddy! Look what Mommy bought me!”
She held up a tiny black Spaniel puppy.
I smiled and took the puppy, lifting it up. It looked me in the eyes and immediately peed on my dress shirt and tie.
Jan laughed. “They say that’s a show of endearment.”
“And all this time I thought it was a wagging tail.”
She grinned and whispered, “You gonna show me some endearment later?”
“You betcha,” I whispered back.
I handed the puppy back to Kimber and said, “Daddy’s gotta get changed. Take this little guy outside for a while.”
After putting my briefcase down, I dropped my copy of The Wall Street Journal on the table. Jan saw the front page and asked, “What’s this?”
“A funny article about some married cheaters website called ‘Ashley Madison’ that got hacked. The hackers posted all the members, including photos for the whole world to see,” I said as I pulled off my tie and unbuttoned my urine-soaked shirt.
Janice was usually pretty good at hiding her emotions, but as she looked at me, her face went pale. She shrugged her shoulders and said, “Why should that interest me?”
“No reason. Just thought you might find it funny. I’m gonna shower. Be back in a few.”
I quickly rinsed off and left the shower running. Then, I snuck across the hall in a towel and peeked in the office. She was just where I suspected she’d be, franticly trying to delete her account. Jan was so preoccupied, she had no clue I was watching. She had discovered what I found out today: you must pay a separate fee to delete the account. I considered confronting her then and there but decided to wait until Kimber was in bed. I quietly slipped away.
A sadness overwhelmed me as I dressed. I loved her so much it hurt. I didn’t want a divorce, no matter what. But how far was I willing to go to keep her? From the short time she joined the site until present, I found it unlikely she hooked up with anyone… yet. What concerned me the most was why. Why would she betray me? As a pragmatic, intelligent person, I had a strong belief that every problem had a solution.
Jan seemed a bit distant at dinner, but I kept the conversation going by asking about school and the puppy. She explained that Kimber was at an age where she should have a pet to teach her responsibilities, and I agreed. All through dinner Jan wouldn’t give me eye contact. I don’t think I had ever seen her this nervous.
I cleared the table and asked her to read to Kimber and get her ready for bed. As she walked away, I put my arm around her, pulled her to me and whispered in her ear, “We need to talk.”
She stiffened up and said nothing. I knew right there that she sensed I knew something.
Later, I read while Jan prepared for bed. When she walked in wearing her flannel granny nightgown, I knew her earlier promise of me getting “lucky” was no longer in the cards. She slid under the covers, opened her novel and started to read like I wasn’t even there. I was determined that she wasn’t going to get a pass on this. I reached over and took her book from her hands.
“What are you doing? I was reading that.”
“You know we need to talk,” I replied, setting her novel aside.
“About what? What’s so important?”
“Really? You’re going to feign ignorance?” I asked.
“Ricky, I really have no clue what you’re referring to.”
“So, you really want me to spell it out?”
“Yes, that might help.”
“Okay. It’s spelled, M-I-S-T-Y.”
Jan immediately looked shaken and stammered, “How… how did you know?”
After a few seconds, tears started running down her face as she wept.
“Someone I know told me. They saw your profile.”
“Oh my God!”
“No one you need to be concerned about—an old friend from school. I hope you delete that account before someone we know sees it; God forbid that someone is a member of the schoolboard.”
Tears continued to flow as she said, “I… l deleted it already. I’m so, so sorry.”
I scooted over to her and cradled her head into my chest. She hesitated but hugged me back.
“W-Why are you being so… nice?” she said between sobs. “Don’t you hate me?”
“Sweetheart, I love you. It will take more than this to take that away. I could never hate you. Sure, I’m not happy about this. I only want to know why. Why didn’t you talk to me if we were having problems?”
Her sobs continued as she looked up in my eyes for the first time since dinner.
She didn’t reply. I could see her remorse, but I needed to know, so I asked again, “Why, Janice?”
“It’s… it’s hard to explain. There’s no easy answer.”
“Give it a try. I’m listening.”
“This might take some time. Let’s go down to the kitchen and I’ll make us some coffee. I don’t want to wake Kimber. But before we do, I want you to know how very sorry I am.” She slipped on her robe and wiped her tears with her sleeve.
I followed her to the kitchen, trying to imagine what she could possibly be thinking. The facts pretty much spoke for themselves: she was intending to cheat on me. As an accountant, I dealt with absolutes, and the bottom line doesn’t lie.
I sat at the table while she busied herself grinding my favorite hazelnut blend. Even after ten years together, I enjoyed watching her move around. I was fearful the best thing in my life was in jeopardy of ending. My emotions were bouncing off the walls, yet I retained an image of composure. I was certainly feeling grief, but there were also feelings of inadequacy and just plain fear of what the future might bring.
Janice set my favorite mug in front of me and said, “Ricky, I already said I’m sorry, but I know that’s not enough for you. Can you believe in your heart that I love you and have no desire to hurt you? If you can’t believe that, then I’m wasting both our times.”
“Jan, I believe you love me… that’s what makes me hurt so much. I hope and pray that we can overcome whatever drove you to this. Go ahead, try to explain.” I sipped some hot coffee and waited.
She looked at me pensively and said, “Thank you for that. I’m not sure I can explain this very easily but here goes… Let me ask you this first… how long has it been since we made love?”
“Hmm, I don’t know. A few weeks I guess. Why?”
“Actually, it’s been thirty-two days—thirty-three, including today.”
“Really? I didn’t know that.”
“I know you don’t. Over a month ago, I stopped asking you for sex and waited for you to come to me. You didn’t. Ricky, all I want is for you to want me. I need my man to need me like air. But sadly, you don’t, do you?”
“Look, sweetheart, I didn’t bother you because I figured you were tired or had some other reason. I’ve never once refused you, have I?”
“Don’t you see? That’s the problem. In all the years we’ve known each other there hasn’t been a single time you’ve initiated sex with me. It’s always me coming to you. Women have a need to be pursued. You say you love me and I believe that, but do you really want me?”
“Of course I want you! I love you for life. Honestly, Jan, I never thought about this before. Are you saying you needed a more experienced lover?”
“It’s not that. It’s not technique. You’re a great lover and perform magnificently. You’re handsome and do everything I ask of you, just as I taught you. That’s the problem, though. Can’t you see it?”
I thought a few seconds before replying, “No. l don’t understand.”
“Ricky, when we first met, I thought it was cute that you were a virgin at twenty-two, but it was me who initiated our first date, our first sex, and even your wedding proposal.”
“Janice, I’m sorry. I promise I’ll try to change. Tell me what you want. I just want you to be happy.”
She looked angry as she gathered her thoughts, then in a slightly raised voice she said, “You just don’t get it. I was the one that was going to cheat on you and you should be raging with anger! Instead, you’re apologizing to me? Can’t you see that’s just not natural!”
“You’re my wife and I love you. I believe you must have had a reason to do what you did. We can work it out. All anger does is cloud the possibility of an amicable solution.”
“God, you’re impossible! We never argue, we never fight…ever! Any man would be uncontrollable if they discovered their wife was planning what I was. They would be threatening divorce or kicking me out. But… not you. Don’t you want to scream at me and call me a whore?”
“What good would that do? Yes, this hurt me greatly. Like a knife in my heart—and of course I was angry.”
“Was?” She stared at me in disbelief.
“I mean...” I sighed in frustration. “I am. I’m angry.”
"For fuck’s sake, Ricky! Where is your passion!?”
“I wasn’t aware that I needed anger to display my passion for my wife.”
“I’m the only person raising my voice here. I find that extremely disturbing!”
“We’re adults, Janice, not children fighting in a sandbox.”
“Will you listen to yourself?” she shouted.
“I’m well aware you were planning on breaking our vows of forsaking all others. But our vows also said, ‘In good times or bad, until death do us part.’ I desperately want to fix this. What do you want from me?”
“Do I really have to spell that out for you?”
It seemed that no matter what I said, I was only making my wife angrier. “I’m trying my best to communicate with you, sweetheart.”
Slap!
I froze in shock, my face stinging. I couldn’t believe she had slapped me.
“Janice…”
Slap!
“What the hell is wrong with you?” I said.
Slap!
“Stop it!”
Just as she was about to strike me again, I grabbed her wrists and held them at her sides. Tears were streaming down her face as she yelled one expletive after another. I acted on instinct and kissed her hard, if only to shut her up. She paused a second and kissed me back like she was trying to suck the life out of me.
She wanted passion? I gave her passion. I kissed her like a man on fire, lifting her up and setting her down on the counter before I ripped open her robe and pushed myself between her thighs. Everything was happening so fast as I shoved her panties to the side and thrust two fingers in her pussy. Janice gasped, but I didn’t give her an opportunity to say anything as I kissed her again, hard and aggressively, while I finger fucked my wife right there on that kitchen counter.
I pulled my fingers out of her and replaced them with my throbbing cock. As I slid my swollen cock head into her soaking wet pussy, I could feel that she was ready for me. Without hesitation, I penetrated her in one deep, powerful thrust.
Janice moaned in ecstasy. I immediately clasped my hand over her mouth and began to fuck her hard. Like a raging bull, I drilled into her pussy, motivated more than ever to give it a well deserved pounding. I was beginning to see what she desired. She wanted more than the mechanics of sex; she wanted something… more.
I couldn’t understand why I responded as I did. I guess I was as sexually frustrated as she was. I plummeted her with all my pent-up emotions. I wasn’t making love any longer. This was something more primal, more animalistic.
She dug her nails into the flesh of my butt. I fucked her hard, never taking my hand away from her mouth. As I picked up my speed, I could tell she was close to climaxing. She shook, and her eyes rolled back as she moaned into my palm.
“Fuck… Fuck!… I’m coming….” My balls tightened, and I started to spasm. “You’re mine,” I breathed out harshly. “Do you understand me?” I groaned between labored breaths, slamming into her.
Janice nodded obediently as she squeezed my ass and locked her legs around me.
Jets of cum exploded inside of her as I bit her neck. I felt my entire body go tense. Once I slowed down, I allowed myself to just pant against her skin. She was just as breathless as I was, collapsing back on the counter.
When I finally looked in her eyes, she held my face and kissed me deeply.
“That’s all I ever wanted from you,” she said, caressing me. “Passion. You made me come so hard.” She giggled. “God, Ricky… you’ve never fucked me like that—ever. All this time I just wanted a master, not a slave.
“I… I guess I just thought…”
“Shhh.” She kissed me again, biting my bottom lip. “Take me upstairs… punish me. I’ve been a very bad girl.”
-oOo-
Two months had passed since the whole “Ashley Madison” incident, and things had changed dramatically. I’d never seen Janice so happy. I discovered that a good sex life translated into more than just physical satisfaction. Our emotional connection and bonding increased to unthought of levels. As our wedding ceremony had said, we’d become one flesh. We never discussed that incident again. I never asked how far she went and she never asked for my source. What was important was us. The rest was ancient history.
It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon and Janice and I had gone shopping at the mall together with Kimber. A six-year-old had limited patience, so we soon found ourselves at the children’s rest area. I took the opportunity to go get us a snack. Whenever we went mall shopping I always got each of us one of those ice cream bars rolled in nuts. It was a tradition.
As I stood in line, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned to discover Jason grinning at me.
“Hey, dude! Small world… Have you been avoiding me? You never did call me back.”
“Sorry, I’ve been consumed by business and family stuff. You know how it goes,” I replied.
“That’s exactly why I stay single. I like my freedom too much. Too many women, too little time.” He laughed.
It was honestly irritating hearing about how much this guy loved being single—almost as if he was overcompensating for something lacking in his life.
“Speaking of women,” I said. “What ever happened with that redhead?”
“Well, that’s another story. We actually did end up meeting for coffee.”
“Is that so? How’d that work out?”
“At first she was uncomfortable, but she warmed up to me after a while. I suggested we go to my place.”
“Oh yeah?... Did she go?”
“She said she didn’t have time but promised to another time. We made out in my car, though. She was hot, wet, and ripe as they come. But after she came on my fingers, she got nervous and said she needed to go—told me she wanted to get together another time to finish what we started. She took my number.”
“So…” I looked at him inquisitively. “Did she ever call?”
“Nope. I haven’t heard from her since. I’m guessing she got cold feet because a week later, there was that Ashley Madison bust. Her profile was suddenly deleted. Too bad… those titties were unbelievable.”
It was my turn to order. I offered to buy Jason’s, but he said he would get his own.
“Three bars?” he said. “You’re either really hungry or the family is here.”
“My wife and daughter are with me. They’re over in the play area. Would you like to meet them?”
“Sure.” He smiled. “Lead the way.”
I felt nervous as we walked toward the playground. I always knew this would inevitably happen with Jason living in the same town. I figured this was the best way for that to happen. I didn’t like secrets.
Kimber was playing on the slide and Jan had her back to me. She was taking video footage with her phone. I tapped her on the shoulder and said, “Sweetheart, there’s someone I want you to meet. This is Jason, my roommate from college.”
I stepped away and as soon as my wife turned around, I watched their eyes lock on one another. Jan’s mouth dropped open as she gasped.
“Jason...” I paused for dramatic effect. “This is my wife Janice. My daughter is the other cute redhead on the slide.”