" I love you," I slurred as I phoned my wife from the pub..
" I love you too ," came the reply..
" When I get back, I'm going to bury my head in your pussy," I continued.
" Three things, Rick," she replied. " 1 - You've got the wrong number.. 2 - this is your mother and 3 - the last time your face was in my pussy was 40 years ago and I shit on your head. Goodnight."
Advanced Wordsmith