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-said nobody, ever.

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lol this idea came to me as i reached for a box of rice crackers over a bag of chips. put your sarcasm to the test! get it all out and have fun!

i'll start:

i totally want to wait thirty minutes for an operator while listening to a kazoo solo.

Say. Her. Name.


who doesn't love waking up to the sound of a tree being sawed?

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I'd sooo love to collect my parcel over the counter instead of having it delivered to my doorstep every time I get something online. Maybe I'd just fly or drive to the seller's place
take your time, i have all day
Yeah sure, I'll pay more for your shitty service (oh this is a fun thread, thanks!)
Oh thankyou for ringing and telling me my computer's gone wrong. I'll ring that number right away.
size doesn't matter.
Oh my goodness!! Thank you for not doing the dishes. I was really looking forward to dishpan hands....
the 2016 election has brought about feelings of tranquility, confidence and hope.

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I just love long lines in the supermarket, especially when there are half dozen employees just visiting with each other.
Please come weed-eat outside my bedroom window at 7am, just as the sun is rising, again tomorrow. Thank you Jesus.
thank you for driving in the passing lane 20 mph/kph under the speed limit.
yeah, let's totally try on swimsuits after going to the all you can eat buffet.

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Thank you. I just so wanted to take more responsibility and work longer hours for the same pay.
can we get one more day of extreme heat and humidity? pretty please?!

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Quote by honeydipped
can we get one more day of extreme heat and humidity? pretty please?!


I hope it lasts all year long!
I wish Donald Trump's skin was more orange.
I wish Donald Trump's skin was more thin.
Aaah the haze is finally here again. Hallelujah!
I like when oncoming cars at night do not turn off there high beam lights, being temperately blind while driving gives you a better feel for distance.
Unicorns are lame
Ooh, I thought handicapped partking spots were for people not for cars
i sure hope there's no hot water left.

Say. Her. Name.