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Are You Funny??

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Are you funny? Post your best jokes about relationships or simply what you think is funny
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If a turtle loses his shell is he homeless or just naked?

If sign makers go on strike, what do their signs say?
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I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.

The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.
Active Ink Slinger
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They say that money can't buy happiness... but poverty can't buy anything!

How come you can play baseball, you can play football, and you can play basketball.... but you can't play soccerball?
Southern Barefoot Angel
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. If you want to catch a squirrel just climb a tree and act like a nut.
The Linebacker
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The way to a woman's heart is to make her laugh, and laugh, and laugh.
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Quote by AmeliaLeigh



???????



I LOVE that first one Amelia. When I sought my divorce, she said she was always right. After my lawyer got the magistrate to see that I was right sometimes too, she still claimed to be always right!
As I exited that little room, I never looked back.
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A Man Who Is Dating Three Women

A man is dating three women and wants to decide which to marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.

The first does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new makeup and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.

The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money, and then he married the one with the biggest tits.
Lurker
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My sense of humor:
I once told my last girlfriend that I wasn't overweight, it was just that all my personality was running out of places to go.

That night she gave me a blowjob.
The next day, she took me to the gym.
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Quote by AmeliaLeigh

If sign makers go on strike, what do their signs say?


If they are on strike they have no signs
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Yes, I'm funny.


My jokes usually tend to be about Hitler and Serial Killers.
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Quote by IMPÜRETHOUGHTS




Yes, I'm funny.


My jokes usually tend to be about Hitler and Serial Killers.





Reminds me of "The Producers" with songs like "Springtime for Hitler in Germany"
Lurker
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I'm not. Ask my friends. I'm totally serious all the time. Fuck em if they can't take a joke!
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Quote by Lokis_Sidekick


Reminds me of "The Producers" with songs like "Springtime for Hitler in Germany"




Datenight film.
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Yes in more than one way, but not that way. Not that there's anything wrong with that way, just saying.
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Only to look at