The miracle of Hospice

Ten years ago last month, I experienced hospice care inside my parent's home, when my mother finally acquiesed to inviting hospice care and nurses into her last few weeks of life. She'd fought this decision for over six months, but was spending a lot of time bouncing from home to the hospital for various maladies which were directly related to her advance COPD.

My father was 79 and had been trying to accomodate his wife's failing health for the previous 3 years, until I'd joined forces with him to provide her the care she required.

Now, I see that hospice is on the horizon for my father, who is rapidly losing his eyesight, to match his inability to hear anything a person might say in a speaking voice. Again, this topic is one I must address within the coming year, as his needs are almost more than I can address on a daily basis.

Would those who have experience with hospice, care to add their comments to this thread? I am still in debt to their services for how they carefully handled the four week situation with my mother.

https://thehill.com/policy/healthcare/4108943-how-jimmy-carter-has-changed-the-conversation-around-hospice/

The empathy and love and care my family was shown when my Dad was dying is a kindness I will always remember. They knew what they were doing, and it was a blessing to be able to trust things to them when the time came.

Nice post, WMM. My condolences and best wishes on the hard journey ahead.

Dad was in a long-term care facility by the time he died. It was not a great facility but the staff were good. Personally, I hope.to die at home. I have some familiarity with the system here since my employer does palliative home oxygen among other services and it is government-funded (home care is not actually covered under Canadian Medicare normally, but Ontario has created special programs for it).

My mom made the decision to get hospice care for my grandmother my freshman year of college. She was a proud, stubborn woman, who rebuffed us even when we cared for her. Hospice was unfazed by her curmudgeonly ways (as we all were), and she was best friends with them by the time she transitioned. They allowed her to go with dignity, and shared in our grief. That kinda thing is priceless.

I don’t have experience with someone from my own family but I did volunteer at a hospice care facility when I was in my 20s. I’ll never forget so many conversations I had with them. It used to break my heart the ones who had no one visiting them. They all seemed well taken care of but I used to only play games, talk, watch TV, help them vote, helped them eat. Stuff like that. Honestly if it were me, I think I would be grateful to be at a place I volunteered at when the time comes. Of course being at home with family would be ideal but I also wouldn’t want to burden my family with that. I’d like them to visit me but not deal with everything else that comes with it.

Quote by Magical_felix

I don’t have experience with someone from my own family but I did volunteer at a hospice care facility when I was in my 20s. I’ll never forget so many conversations I had with them. It used to break my heart the ones who had no one visiting them. They all seemed well taken care of but I used to only play games, talk, watch TV, help them vote, helped them eat. Stuff like that. Honestly if it were me, I think I would be grateful to be at a place I volunteered at when the time comes. Of course being at home with family would be ideal but I also wouldn’t want to burden my family with that. I’d like them to visit me but not deal with everything else that comes with it.

Thankfully hospice does allow for in-home end of life care.

Quote by WellMadeMale

Now, I see that hospice is on the horizon for my father, who is rapidly losing his eyesight, to match his inability to hear anything a person might say in a speaking voice. Again, this topic is one I must address within the coming year, as his needs are almost more than I can address on a daily basis.

Like Ensorceled said, best wishes with the hard road ahead.

I don't have any experience with hospice care myself.

Firstly, caring and supportive vibes, prayers sent to anyone who's seen loved ones struggle at end of life.

In Louisville, we used Hosparus instead of Hospice because in addition to Hospice care they include advance care planning, counseling for family, and care coordination if your loved one is in a facility.

Unfortunately, Mom's Alzheimers became more than Dad (or my sis and me since we work full-time) could handle during the Pandemic. Her memory care facility was off-and-on lockdown due to Covid. They struggled to keep enough staff. We called Hosparus and they did an evaluation of Mom and will step-in if they think patient is within last 6 months of life. They immediately brought in a hospital bed, new wheelchair, took over Mom's bathing since she was too violent for less-experienced facility staff. And improved communications between us all. They told us when it was time for Morphine and convinced Memory Care facility to let her pass there (had become her home in her mind) rather than move her to a nursing home.

I highly recommend.

And everything is at no cost to the family.