You know you are a parent when you wake up at 2:00 AM and see the light is still on and your kid hasn't come back home yet. You then either get up and watch TV until they return or toss and turn in bed until you hear the delightful sound of the deadbolt unlocking, signaling they are home.
You're a veteran parent when out with your children and one has a snotty nose, if you can't find tissue you are forced to use your sleeve. Hey it happens occasionally.
The most annoying thing is when kids have control of the t.v then they bugger off but you carry on watching the cartoons for half hour before it dawns on you that you are the only one in the room.
Double post! Slap my wrist.
Every time your son gets sick, He comes to you for comfort. Isn't it amazing how rapidly they recover once they have given their sickness to you.. I wouldn't change it for the world..
You know you are a parent when you can no longer go to the bathroom by yourself.
Sarcastic Coffee Aficionado
I can't really remember what life was like when I wasn't a parent.
You go into parenthood with an "idea"(I was in my early 20's - so did I really have a clue???) ... yet it blows your mind when years later, you wanna yell that it was false advertising!! LOL .... BUT we survived this incredible job and responsibility - and we wouldn't change it for almost anything!!
You're too tired to thing. Or so I'm told.
You get all emotional in movies, where you never did before, over scenes involving parent/child relationships.
I was crying during Man of Steel today. Never would have happened before kids.
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You become more familiar with other people's shit than your own.
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When you see a couple of hot college chicks walking around half naked during Ultra Music festival, and think..."They should cover up."
The music that once put you in mind of lovely topless ladies spinning around a pole has now been replaced by songs about bus wheels and friendship.
You nearly wet yourself from excitement at the prospect of going to the grocery store by yourself.
When you're out with friends and you swear, then apologize in your best baby voice. "Mommy didn't mean to say a no-no word!" Yeah- won't be living that one down for a long time.
I've seen a bone pop out of someone's arm and been level headed the entire way to the hospital, but one drop of blood on my babies and I flip my shit.
when you tell your kids they can't do something because they are too young when you know damn well you were doing it at their age or before.
You know your a parent when you know all the words to they theme songs of the children's programme's. When you are sitting at the traffic lights signing away to nursery rhyme cd and people look at you weirdly coz you have no children in the car. But number one for me is when i put my children to bed and i get a kiss and 'Night Night mummy, see you in the morning, LOVE YOU.'
You sneak half an hour on lush while baby is napping
You know you are a parent when during sex and there is a knock on the bedroom door at the crucial moment, the words "I'm Coming" have 2 meanings...
When you know all the lyrics to the wiggles, Barney songs, etc.
When you are woken up at 5:30 AM everyday
When you just want your children to have the best of everything, not worry so much about yourself
When walking through the mall you offer to whip someone's kids ass for them.
You know you're a parent when you can run barefoot over a spilt tub of Lego without even flinching.Wa1Xq0op1dC9rJ9p
You know more about Dora Explorer, Thomas Engine, Bob Builder than 50 shades.
Sarcastic Coffee Aficionado
You know you are a parent when ..... you only have coins in your wallet because they've "borrowed" the bills .... when do you get that money back?? (never)
I have to go back in my memory for this but:
1. when you wet your thumb with saliva to wipe a dirty face.
2. you plan your nights out around the babysitters
3. the best of all-you become a master chef for pancake making.
Having one child makes you a parent;
Having more than one child makes you a referee!
When every noise makes you stop and ask, "Was that the baby?"
you know your a parent when you are mentally going through a checklist at all hours, for their up and coming events be that birthdays, school calendar events, sports (yes all of them all seasons) what needs upgrading, replacing, repairing and the added extras that they seem to always need.
Did I mention voluntary parental support, coaching, carpooling and babysitting, doctor, nurse, financier, secretary and chief encourager, judge, jury and disciplinarian! Stationery what the hell, where does it all go?
Clothes OMG how fast do they grow! Somewhere yes there's more you sleep better when they're home tucked up in bed. Happiness takes hold of you then you start it all over again the next day! Until you send them to boarding school that a whole different kettle of fish ... don't get me started!
How quiet life was before the lil buggers ... but yeah you love them just the same ... you deal with it and you keep going!
You know you're a parent when all your decisions and choices no longer are based on what you want or need BUT are based on whats best for them.
And you know you're a parent when your small purse turns into a survivor bag full of colors and toys and snacks and extra clothes lol just for one day out
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