Active Ink Slinger
you can share if you have any good/bad experience with one night stand... : )
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One night stand : you prefer or not?
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Active Ink Slinger
Quote by thesexynun
no I know I am old and old fashioned
but I have to be in love to enjoy sex
and sex with a stranger though perhaps a good fantasy
in my reality I have to know...him
I am the very same way. Could not agree more.
Sarcastic Coffee Aficionado
no thanks .... to me it's a very empty situation
Matriarch
Quote by Deumea
I rolled over and banged my head on my one night stand. Made it a point to move it farther away from the bed.
http://instantrimshot.com/index.php?sound=rimshot
Active Ink Slinger
Sex is so much more than a physical connection. The emotional bond of knowing that you've made your partner so happy is something that can't be captured in one night or one week.
Which is why despite the situation I stay.
Which is why despite the situation I stay.
While my preference runs to a long term relationship, I've also enjoyed a few one night stands along the way. AND, for various reasons on each occasion the ladies involved enjoyed it too. For one; right after her divorce, it was reassurance of her sex appeal and an ego boost. (We had sex on a Greyhound bus, two passengers who found instant attraction, each with a different destination, who would never see each other again.) Another time an airline stewardess on the plane I took to boot camp inducted me into the "mile high club" in the plane's bathroom while the other stewardess stood watch outside the door. A couple of months later a sweetie who was being ignored by the Navy guys she was with left the bar with me and we went to the deserted balcony of a NEARLY deserted movie theater and got it on (another occasion when, we would never see one another again but we both had a GREAT orgasm and she too got an ego boost after having had her ego deflated by the guys she had been with.) Those are just a few examples, there have been others. BUT, as I said; for the most part I too PREFER long term relationships.
Active Ink Slinger
One night stands never do the job, they usually involve copious amounts of alcohol and only suffice if you haven't had it in a while. There again, I have quite alot to concentrate on at the moment, and alot of personal planning to do, so I'm not sure a full on relationship is the answer right now either. A friend with benefits would be ideal scenario for me right now, though them in themselves are doomed to limted lifespans...
Rookie Scribe
Had a one night stand once with a girl i met in a club. Well it was supposed to be a one night stand. strictly sex, Wham bam thank you Mam. But It ended up in a 3 year relationship. But im allways trying to be too nice cause of my guilty conscience, unlike most of my friends whom just show the girl the door and give her a couple of bucks for a Taxi. :P I prepared breakfast the next day, and we ended up talking for hours and it Turned out we were a good match and enjoyed each others company. haha. I fail at one night stands.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Wardog
Hey man, QUIT planning life! Just RELAX and let it happen! LOL
I actually totally disagree, this is an excuse not to chase the things you want, and it's usually it's used as an excuse not to improve yourself. The things we want don't fall into our laps, and very few people who 'relax and let it happen ' get the most out of life to achieve their dreams. What we want in life doesn't just come to most people, but most people don't realise that until it's too late, which is why all elderly people reminisce about what the wish that had done when "They were your age". Your future is created by what you do today, not tomorrow. So you find yourself in the latter part of life, working dead end job you can't stand, struggling to own your own home, not making the money you would like, have children you can't provide with things they want, and can never afford to go on holiday, or treat yourself to nice things, and maybe your even still single, pahaps theres a chance it's because you 'relaxed and let it happen'.
Ironically, this is not because the universe is crewl, this is because the universe is clever. It knows we don't appreciate things that just drop in front us, and one key principle of human nature is, the harder we work to get something, the higher value it has to us.
We are not entitled to all the things we want, we are not entitled to man/woman we've always dreamed of, we are not entitled to a paying great job or that promotion you've always wanted, you are not entitled to the four bedroomed house, and the holiday home in Spain. All these things you have to work hard for, nobody will give you them, and only the people who have plans, motivation, drive and ambition, will ever get them.
Luckily, non of this is unobtainable either. Usually the things we want in life, drop somewhere near us, but we have to recognise them when they come, and work hard to get them. This doesn't mean my mind isn't free and clear, it is. I don't run around my every day life like a blue-assed fly, but I do want to have the focus and drive to go and get what I want out of life, because nobody is going to give it to me on a plate.
So my plans are to go to Uni to Study a degree, and I also want to travel the world, and spend extended periods of time in countries I always wanted to visit, ultimately, I'd like to go back to Australia, and live there, because the UK doesn't have much to fulfill me. I also want to learn guitar, get fluent in German, take up Go Karting, learn to dance, meet the girl of dreams, have a family, have a nice house etc etc etc...
None of this stuff will just come to me, I have to apply myself and take the time, and put in the effort to achieve it. Some of it, I'm sure I won't. But just because things don't always go to plan, doesn't mean that plan wasn't worth having. There is plenty time for relaxing, once you've obtained some of the things you want from life.
I would prefer to be in a relationship of some kind with the person I'm with, but it need not be a longterm romantic thing. A "friend with benefits" would be fine.
That said, the right person in the right place at the right time and, yeah, I could probably do a one-nighter. It's just not what I look for normally.
That said, the right person in the right place at the right time and, yeah, I could probably do a one-nighter. It's just not what I look for normally.
Active Ink Slinger
A one night stand is ok.........but if you can make a weekend out of it.....Woohoo ?
My Karma just ran over your Dogma
Active Ink Slinger
I've had far too many to count, they run into hundreds. Some great, some good, some ok and some rubbish. It would have been nice to have had one person but I used to self destruct relationships.
I can't change things that happened, it was just the way I was. I had a lot of sex though, probably too much to appreciate it.
I can't change things that happened, it was just the way I was. I had a lot of sex though, probably too much to appreciate it.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by dpw
I've had far too many to count, they run into hundreds. Some great, some good, some ok and some rubbish. It would have been nice to have had one person but I used to self destruct relationships.
I can't change things that happened, it was just the way I was. I had a lot of sex though, probably too much to appreciate it.
Admirable honesty, I think this is true for more of us than we would probably like to admit. How many women have I played games with where I haven't fully appreciated them, and just used them for fun when they genuinely liked me. I know right now, that I am not the only one guilty of this, women do this to men every day, men do it women every day. Sometimes we strive for sex, not only as a release, but also just for our own validation and to know we are sexually desired, without actually caring so much about what the other person needs from you. But these are poor reasons for sex really, but it's all part of our sexual journey. But then when you mess it up by not taking things more seriously, you kick yourself and wonder if you made a mistake. Nontheless, I've always considered myself a good person, I guess this is just part of being young, it is a fact of life that should be accepted rather than regretted.
What I have normally found is that someone ends up hurt. I can't tell you how many friends I know who slept with someone because they said all of the right things, promised them things and then never called. They never had the intention to. Very few people in my opinion can handle it. I have also known a few who could but then I don't know the other person so maybe they could have been left hurt or maybe not. I also know someone who ended up pregnant with an STD and that was not a pretty scene believe me.
It sounds sexy but I think it is best left to fantasy life.
It sounds sexy but I think it is best left to fantasy life.
Cryptic Vigilante
One night stands are really not a preference for me. In my opinion, the more complicity and experience you have with a partner, the better the sex is. Plus, you don't really know who you're bringing home which can lead to a lot of troubles (stealing, stalking, etc.). I had a friend who fucked a random girl a few times before finally dropping her (since she was mostly a hot nutcase). A few weeks later, she came back to his apartment with a tattooed brute and she told him he owed her money and shit. True story.
I much prefer to know my partners at least a little. This provides confidence in just about everything (sexual preferences, overall security, STDs probabilities, etc.), plus I'm a romantic and enjoy a certain emotional connection. If the sex was great with a partner, I prefer to repeat the experience with her rather than go hunting for a random lady. Less trouble, more fun. This might be a harsh judgement, but I also believe that girls that are willing to fuck with random guys are rarely the most gorgeous, educated, interesting and independant women either, in most cases. A lot of them just need approval from random guys and/or are looking for stories to tell their friends about. Valuable women are usually a bit more selective, and will want to learn more about you too.
Now the phenomenon is different if it's a girl that you just met through mutual friends. If this is the case, you'll at least have some reference and probably heard about her before. You'll know her without knowing her, so to speak. That happened to me a few times. But even then, I prefer when there's a possibility to reproduce the experience.
I much prefer to know my partners at least a little. This provides confidence in just about everything (sexual preferences, overall security, STDs probabilities, etc.), plus I'm a romantic and enjoy a certain emotional connection. If the sex was great with a partner, I prefer to repeat the experience with her rather than go hunting for a random lady. Less trouble, more fun. This might be a harsh judgement, but I also believe that girls that are willing to fuck with random guys are rarely the most gorgeous, educated, interesting and independant women either, in most cases. A lot of them just need approval from random guys and/or are looking for stories to tell their friends about. Valuable women are usually a bit more selective, and will want to learn more about you too.
Now the phenomenon is different if it's a girl that you just met through mutual friends. If this is the case, you'll at least have some reference and probably heard about her before. You'll know her without knowing her, so to speak. That happened to me a few times. But even then, I prefer when there's a possibility to reproduce the experience.
Fine, feel free to live your life your way. Plan it all out, thinking that happiness is a destination (I made that mistake too years ago) then it dawned on me... life is... THE JOURNEY! If you'd rather not enjoy it, the loss is yours not mine. Best of luck, guys like you need all they can get. I've learned to enjoy not just today, not just this hour but THIS MINUTE. The next one may NEVER come for either of us.
Active Ink Slinger
Never had one. No problem with two people having sex once. LOL
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Wardog
Fine, feel free to live your life your way. Plan it all out, thinking that happiness is a destination (I made that mistake too years ago) then it dawned on me... life is... THE JOURNEY! If you'd rather not enjoy it, the loss is yours not mine. Best of luck, guys like you need all they can get. I've learned to enjoy not just today, not just this hour but THIS MINUTE. The next one may NEVER come for either of us.
It's fortunate that we live in a universe where both my principles of hard work, ambition, drive and motivation, and your principles of being laid back, easy going, going with the flow and living in the moment, can actually co-exsist harmoneously in one persons life. You will find that the happiest people in the world, have a healthy mixure of both these traits, which is exactly what I want to achieve in my life.
Everything should be in moderation, including personal qualities. I've seen people nail university studies, get great jobs, push from promotions, buy nice cars and afford nice houses, only to reach their 30's-40's and realise they are not happy. Because despite their success, they haven't experienced anything. There again I've seen people live in the moment, always partying, always having fun, getting plenty of girls, and being the life and soul of their friends lives, but they too reach that age and wish they had applied themselves to something more beneficial to success in life. They best way is to have a healthy mix between the two lifestyles. People don't just have to be one or the other, neither do I.
What I do really want to do, is travel, I've already spent to years in Australia, the best time of my whole life, but that hasn't quenched my thirst for it, now i'm back in the UK, the last thing I want to do is give up on that desire. Travelling is one thing I've never heard one single person ever say they regretted.
Speaking of regrets; I've worked as a security officer in a retirement home; which is where people go to live out the last years of their lives and die. As a result the nurses watched lot of people die. A couple of them have told me, "I've never yet heard even ONE of them say, I wish I'd spent MORE time at the office." And, what you said about wanting to travel reminded me of one trip to Thailand my first) there were several of us Americans together, and the first day we had to wait to get started. We were waiting on a guy who was on the internet on his laptop. I waited for a while and then walked over and asked him< Will all of this stuff you're doing be "there" when you get home?" He said, 'Yeah, it will, why?" And, I said, "I thought so, and everything you came here to spend two weeks in Thailand enjoying will still be right here...in Thailand..." He got off of the computer and I didn't see it again for the rest of the trip. In short, I agree with you to an extent. There IS "a time for everything"... IF you allow yourself the time! Think about it.
Active Ink Slinger
I love one night stands.
Rookie Scribe
I've had two one night stands, thinking they were the the beginning of a new relationship. More fool me for making the same mistake twice
IF the avatar IS your photo, some of us are inclined to think that just maybe YOU weren't the fool. (Sometimes a one nighter can BOOST an ego other times it tears it down Do yourself a favor and don't ASSUME that YOU made "the mistake". If you enjoyed the sex, take that from the experience and leave the rest behind you.)