Ok, I have a friend that has a problem she has a guy that is emailing her 5-10 times a day long rambling letters. The problem is she is not into him he's sweet but too clingy she has tried talking to him letting him down easy kept him as a friend even though maybe she should not have Then after a very heavy mail day she unfriended him explained again that she is sorry but there is just not a spark that its no ones fault it just is. After a few emails, he quits for about 24 hours he won't accept that she is not into him and she feels worse every time she has to explain to him again. So should she block him it is going to hurt him and she hates it but she just can't pretend to be into him, to be fair it's mostly his clinging attitude that is a turn-off. So guys and gals what should she do. Is there something she has not tried?
I've had guys like that. It doesn't sound like she's sending him mixed signals, but hope springs eternal in the loins of men, so they can be pretty dense when it comes to rejection! She'll probably wind up having to block him, as uncomfortable as that recourse feels.
Stop reading his emails and responding to him....I find that just ignoring someone works best, both here and in real life. You may still have to block him, but no one is forcing you to read his messages or respond, so stop.
She could try emailing one last time asking him not to contact her in any way. Delete him, block him then block him from her email if it's a private one. If he finds some other way to contact you, block that too. He's harassing you. No means no.
Tell him for sure, it is the only way, should he persist then you can take the other steps, sometimes we are all too soft. I should rather know as hard as it is to accept, especially for sensitive guys who think they mean well, as I know only too well got my sins!
I have been infatuated with many women but in my own way. I am who I am and that automatically means, some of women will not care to have me around. Others will be enamored of me. I expect that if I am not someone else's cup of tea that they should tell me, and I will move on. If I don't then they would drop me. The same is the inverse of that. If someone is just spoiling my stay here, I tell them and drop them. You may have to go that far.
“You can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can’t please all of the people all of the time”.”
I take it that the guy is here on LS or some other site and they have not met and he does not know her address or any other identifying information. If this is the case just STOP RESPONDING to his messages and delete them unopened. If he don't get the message block him.
Brandie
I've had a similar experience except I felt so sorry for him that I caved and dated him. Turns out he was so insecure he became controlling very quickly. I'd tell her to place those boundaries and stand firm on them. Even if it means cutting contact for a while to get the message across.
Sounds like she has told him more than enough times to stop... it is time to block him and cease all contact Time for her to no longer feel bad for him... He should be the one feeling bad for causing her this angst... Sounds like he is selfish and only cares about his feelings... Good luck to your friend!
characterized by intense feeling; passionate; fervent
Intensely devoted, eager, or enthusiastic; zealous
vehement; fierce burning, fiery, or hot
A better option than blocking is to keep the old email and just open a new one. When someone is blocked, they try to find a new email. If you keep the old one, and just open a new one, you can ignore the old one and the stalker will be less likely to take other steps to get new contact info for you. Hopefully, this is an option, and he does not have something like a professional email address. Good luck to your friend.
sounds like she's gone above and beyond being cordial. she either needs to be even more blunt and outright block him; or practice what is commonly referred to as the fade out. stop replying to his mail. don't try to explain or reason. hell, delete the mail unopened. he'll get the hint, hopefully.
Is this a joke, clingy and stalking some one isnt sweet, it's called weirdO.......dont answer the E-Mails.......and drop the guilt, its words on a screen that should be blocked and ignored...just like hanging up the phone, very easy
it's not a failing, and i do it at times, too, but often, you try to be nice, be kind, instead of just being blunt and putting it on the line - which, in the long run, is kinder. in other words, just tell him to knock it the fuck off cause it's starting to annoy her.
You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.
UPDATE: she did block him on Lush and from other places he had found its quiet for the moment.
sometimes we are to easy to let our need not to hurt get in the way.
Thanks
Block him. He has to Man up and become independent . Women want a man not a child.
I don't like to block people unless I feel I have to, so I'd just stop responding to him at first. If after a week or two he's still writing, then he's obviously ignoring the message, so by all means, block him.
