Speak only when spoken to or asked a question . If you have something to say speak otherwise you can be digging yourself a hole that you'll never get out of, or as a hot friend once told me when you speak your mind say it with honesty and quick ! You won't be taken as a fool when pinned after saying anything foolish !
Quote by VanGogh As many have said, it's not in your best interest to keep things bottled up. And, as CK has mentioned, it depends on the situation, who's involved, and whether there is benefit to saying your mind/what your heart says.
In my life, I am one of those that writes things down. I'll stew over something if it's important to me or my loved ones. Sometimes, my opinion isn't popular, and as we all know, words can be like knives ... so I try to ensure my comments are not directly hurtful.
I have also found, as I "mature" (don't laugh, I am!) there are things that you really don't need to sweat over, things that will annoy you, and things that you do need to speak up about. The trick is learning what is which of those.
Be prepared to ACKNOWLEDGE that SOME might find that HURTFUL, AND IF THEY DO, be prepared to at once DEFEND, but then be BIG ENOUGH to LET IT GO having made your point...
(I DISAGREE with some people here, but it's impossible to sometimes counter somebody's legitimately held view... My OPINION is NO MORE VALID than any other, DESPITE MY CONVICTION...)
I like to speak my mind but if I know what I say will hurt someones feelings I'll keep my mouth shut.I dont really like being cruel but if you piss me off watch out
Over the last few years I have started using the filter between my brain an mouth. Used to be it I thought it I said it, not minding who's feelings got hurt or if they got mad. Guess getting older has taught me to keep my mouth shut.
Unknown User
Today I really spoke up. It might not have been the most diplomatic thing to do but it really felt good.
I usually keep my mouth shut and not say anything.. but it gets old, you get walked on to many times, so no more, I got something to say, Im gonna say it!
Be prepared to ACKNOWLEDGE that SOME might find that HURTFUL, AND IF THEY DO, be prepared to at once DEFEND, but then be BIG ENOUGH to LET IT GO having made your point...
(I DISAGREE with some people here, but it's impossible to sometimes counter somebody's legitimately held view... My OPINION is NO MORE VALID than any other, DESPITE MY CONVICTION...)
Nor is yours...
(Respect is ALL...)
xx SF
I absolutely agree with this. Like many have said, keeping things bottled up will only end up hurting you in the end. Your mind only has so much space to process information and some, even if subconscious, can build up until there's no room left and you often end up freaking out anyway.
I have problems with this when it comes to my emotions. I'm not very good at managing them, so I kind of avoid them... and then one tiny, random, small thing can go wrong and I will start bawling my eyes out. It's weird.
If you're still not sure who to share things with, keep a journal! I know it might sound lame, but writing out your problems can have a profound effect on you, and can not only help you get them off your mind, but might even help you come up with a solution!
For me it takes a lot for me to speak up and I usually don't but when you are saying things that hurt my son or my family that is when i usually let my mouth go and i let it spew! Then i go back to keeping my mouth shut! And it does feel good to speak my mind every once in a while!
Long story short it is best to speak your mind if something doesn't feel right. Otherwise you will dwell on it and it will bring you down and whatever it is will continue. I learnt it.
My wife and I are opposites in this. When there's something on her mind, whatever it is, I'm going to hear about it. She has a need to express herself, and can't stand being silenced. I don't mean this in a negative way, but she processes things verbally, needs to talk them out and be heard.
I'm far more introverted. For me, I'd rather work things out on my own, rather than discuss it with others. Usually, if I sit with something for awhile, between the passage of time and the chance to think it through, I can usually deal with what's on my mind. I don't consider it 'bottling,' which is simply stuffing your feelings, and self-censoring. For me, this is more productive.