"The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept." ~George Carlin
"Good sex is like good Bridge... If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." Mae West.
“I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” ~Oscar Wilde
"It's true we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives"
-hope it stays put ...
Sometimes you have to be a high-riding bitch to survive. Sometimes being a bitch is all a woman has to hold onto.
An accident, Dolores, can be an unhappy woman's best friend.
Well if it aint the Grand high Puba of Upper Butt Crack.
Go then, there are other worlds than these.
I've given up thinking - it keeps getting me into trouble.
When asked,"How do you write ?" I invariably answer, "one word at a time.' - Stephen King
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -Winston Churchill
"The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do." ~ Walter Bagehot
DO NOT Meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
I tried being good, but I got bored.
You don't have to be crazy to work here, We'll train you!
"I became insane, with long intevals of horrible sanity." -Edgar Allan Poe-
If you can't take the heat, don't tickle the Dragon.
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Not all who wander are lost.
I'm Not Stubborn, My way is just better.
I feel a sin comin' on.
It doesn't matter where you go in life...
It's who you have beside you.
"Truth never damages a cause that is just." -Mohandas K. Gandhi-
"The best gift I was ever given, was a book I had not yet read" -Benjamin Franklin-
"When you get to the end of your rope - tie a knot in it and hang on." -Eleanor Roosevelt, U.S. First Lady-
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." Voltaire.
By cultivating the beautiful we scatter the seeds of heavenly flowers, as by doing good we cultivate those that belong to humanity.
Don't ever become a pessimist... a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun, and neither can stop the march of events.
I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.
One of the sanest, surest, and most generous joys of life comes from being happy over the good fortune of others.
There is no way that writers can be tamed and rendered civilized or even cured. the only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation room, where he can endure the acute stages in private and where food can be poked in to him with a stick.
Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards.
When any government, or any church for that matter, undertakes to say to its subjects, This you may not read, this you must not see, this you are forbidden to know, the end result is tyranny and oppression no matter how holy the motives.
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
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All quotes of the late, great R. A. Heinlein.
whats the definition of cheeky? throwing a brick through some body's window then knocking on the door to ask for it back
it's not being smooth and slick that does the trick, it's the throb of the nob that does the job!
The difference between a GOOD and a BAD girl? A GOOD girl goes to a party, goes home then goes to bed. A BAD girl goes to a party, goes to bed then goes home
i try not to be mean to people, but they keep giving me opportunities..like talking, or walking into my visual space
A banana and a vibrator were on a table. Banana says to the vibrator, "I don't know what the fuck you're shaking for, the bitch is going to eat me!"
thinking with the long weekend she should pitch a tent, drink some rum, light a fire and dance naked around it, what do u think ~ me
Japanese girl was making love and accidentally passed wind. she quickly explained, "Oh me so sorry, you make front hole so happy, back hole blow you kiss"
Sex is a sensation,caused by temptation,to increase population,for the next generation,do you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?
playing table tennis with the giraffes while dressed as a penguin and singing the maccarena ~me
I Aint A Retard... I Actually Choose To Lick Windows!!! ~ my sister
“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love.” ~ Washington Irving
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It make you so vulnerable. It opens up your chest and it opens up your heart and it mean someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole set of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different than any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life... You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. The did something du mb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and your life isn't yours anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. Eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should just be friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. Its a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love." ~Neil Gaima "Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration." - Thomas Edison.
"In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language." - Mark Twain
"Suppose I were a congressman. And suppose I were an idiot. But I repeat myself..." - Mark Twain
"You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time." - Abraham Lincoln
Some people are like Slinkies - not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
"Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change, but pretty soon...everything's different."- Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes
"Try not to become a man of success but rather try to be a man of value."
~Albert Enstine~
"It is curious - curious that physical courage should be so common in the world, and moral courage so rare."
~Mark Twain~
It is only illegal if you get caught Maynard James Keenan
Beliefs are dangerous beliefs allow the mind to stop funtioning a nonfuctioning mind is cliniclly dead.... Bill Hicks
"Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans." - John Lennon
"Nothing in life is to be feared. It's only to be understood." ~ Marie Curie
"Life is like a taxi. The meter just keeps a-ticking whether you are getting somewhere or just standing still." ~ Lou Erickson
"“In any relationship in which two people become one, the end result is two half-people.”
~Wayne Dyer
"If you wind up with a boring, miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest or some guy on TV telling you what to do, then YOU DESERVE IT." ~Frank Zappa
"Better a little which is well done, than a great deal imperfectly." - Plato
"Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." - Oscar Wilde
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it's limits." - Albert Einstein
"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde