I am good friends with this couple, and the short of it is, the girl of the couple will go to great lengths to make sure I am never alone with her boyfriend or any other girl for that matter.
This bugs the hell out of me because he's a good friend, but I don't want to over step my bounds.
I would also like to state I have never had any relationship with this guy, he is seriously just a friend. so WTF?!
how do I deal with this?
If you're close friends with the guy, you could casually ask him what's up. Obviously she's very insecure by nature, but certain types of guys also like to provoke this or casually joke around about their 'hot' female friends with GF's too to keep them on their toes or even to keep the relationship at a certain 'non-intense' level. It could be that this has backfired and now she's just ultra-clingy or uncertain about their relationship. Plus she may have some major cheating-baggage from a past relationship.
I wouldn't say anything to her directly, other than when you're hanging out, try to casually reinforce how her man is such a great buddy and how he's totally not your type or he's helped give you great advice about guys in the past, or he's a great 'wing-man' to you in the bars etc. Basically just subtly reassuring her that you have zero interest in him and that it's mutual. You can kind of work this into random natural convos in subtle ways without coming right out and making it obvious. The more of a solid 'girl/girl' friend vibe that you're able to establish with her, the more she's going to feel comfortable with you in general. I know it seems like a lot of work. I've done this in the past myself.
Otherwise, I'd just let it play out. I don't know how serious it is, but if it's more of a casual relationship, things will probably blow over in a few months anyway. Eventually it will start to piss him off and he will address it with her. You can't have a functional relationship when one person is that paranoid and suspicious.
This is really good advice. Thank you!!
Sorry but I disagree with Dancing_Doll. If you say anything at all to this girlfriend she will take it the wrong way and think you have designs on her boyfriend.
Don't say anything and let this relationship run its natural course.
Is there a totally safe way? I don't think so. I'd just leave it alone. But if you really ARE interested in this friend of yours, which you very well could be and are giving her signs knowingly/unknowingly, then I'd say, back off. If he is interested in her, and you really care about him, then don't risk messing up something good he may have, and probably your friendship with him.
TRY to become friends with HER and then start telling her about guys that turn you on all the while making it clear that they're guys who are NOT like HER guy!
TRY to become friends with HER and then start telling her about guys that turn you on all the while making it clear that they're guys who are NOT like HER guy!
I completely forgot this thread was here.
So here's how the story panned out. He dumped her (in short) for being a controlling bitch. So, the problem did get solved. He's sure happier
