I was burning through the channels today on satellite and saw a mention on CNN about a 17 yr old high school student who had physically backed his teacher/instructor up against a wall, in a classroom. They were both standing...he was towering over her and mouthing off, above her...she had to look up at him and was being forced to cower.
She: Thirty-something, about 5'4" in height...140 pounds (you do the conversion please)
He: Towering over her at 6'3" plus and 220 pounds...
He had her backed up and he was basically lecturing her about something in a heated argument. A classroom video camera showed that she used her arms to push him back and away. I will say that it appeared that she was in her rights to do this.
She was charged with assaulting the student. I think the evidence will prove that he was assaulting her and she was protecting herself.
Let's read your thoughts. How do you handle close-fucking-talkers? When do you say, 'enough is e-fucking-nuff, back the fuck away.'
Myself, I will let someone get away with nose to nose commentary (if that person finds it necessary to get in my face) but my reply will be equally forceful and to the gawdamned point.
"Fuck off and get out of my face, this is your 1st and last warning."
I know associates who would deck someone who encroached within 12 inches of them. What is your boundary line? How far will you be..pushed or allow someone to try to intimidate you, before you let loose the hounds of hell?
The same GQP demanding we move on from January 6th, 2021 is still doing audits of the November 3rd, 2020 election.
Back the fuck off.
I will at times, take a step to the side, never back, or simply angle my body to the intruder.
Funny thing about that story. I had a History teacher who was about and inch shorter and 10 pounds lighter. She once stopped class, took the phenom jock outside and jacked his ass up for being rude in class. He did have it coming to him.
As is the case nowadays, to many rights on the wrong side.
I like a little space with strangers; an arm's length sounds fine. With close friends and lovers, i.e., people whom I trust, there's no need for a boundary, so I don't feel uncomfortable even if they have to crawl over me in a tight space.
eviotis, you said, "too many rights on the wrong side." Couldn't agree more. And I'd like to add, since it seems relevant, that a lot of recent changes in law (in the U.S., at least) seem suspiciously designed to keep anyone from ever relying on his own strength and defending himself. Such as the cases where burglars have filed assault charges against homeowners. Also gun rights, etc.. It seems that we're never supposed to stand up for ourselves; instead, we're supposed to go crying to an authority whenever someone so much as hurts our feelings. All these laws designed to enforce "political correctness" and the like. Hell, two grown men can't even have an honest fistfight anymore without someone calling the cops! George Carlin called this "the continued pussification of the American male", and I, for one, don't buy in. You throw a punch at me, I'm not doing the P.C. thing and calling the cops, I'm going to throw one back.
Wow. This topic brings up some visceral memories.
I'd have to say my personal space boundary is relative to how well I know/trust the individual and what level of agitation is being presented. In general, though, I suppose an arm's length would be about right.
In some stressful and educational experiences in my youth, I've learned that I cannot control myself long enough for an agitated person to get away with nose to nose commentary. I find others' self-restraint during nose-to-nose commentary to be admirable and incredible. In my adult life I've been in that situation very few times and, though I'm generally a peaceful person, each of those situations have ended in physical violence. I cannot say that I'm proud of my actions, but I'm not entirely displeased.
quite frankly, i am unpredictable... i can be very touchy feely with people i a m comfortable with - holding hands, hugging, just finding reasons to reach out and touch their arms, their hands, their legs, not sexual, but affectionate - on the other hand, if someone i don't feel comfortable gets into my space, and that space tends to be fluid - at times it's arms length, at other times, it's their mere presence in the room, i can get a little uncomfortable or even panic at times.
You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.
I trust people from the off ... unless u get that weird feeling about someone.
With people i know, can be a respectful touchy feely type ...
It depends on the situation. I've let strangers handle my balls, and I've told family members to say their piece from across the room. I'll usually let people get to within arm's distance if I know them. Passing strangers a little farther off. I figure if you're close enough to touch me, you're too close. Unless you're a person I want touching me.
how did i miss this one?
well theres a lot of variable here yeah?
with girlfriends im very touchy feely...
with strangers then maybe a little more space 18 inches maybe
with drunk assholes in the bar they get a ring jabbed in the solar plexus and then it becomes clear i will need at least an arms length if not 20
my fav though is those people who mistake me for a quiet unassuming woman (yes it happens!) and use getting in my face as an intimidation tactic in order to win their argument. in those cases i tend to give as good as i get. hehee usually surprising the hell out of my opponent. ;)
Three to four meters is an exaggeration. I later realized what I wrote and couldn't edit it in time.
I like to have my own space, but my job requires me to work almost next to other people. Over compensation I guess?
I prefer to mix my own drinks at home so I don't have to be a drunken danger to anyone on the road with me.
Well I hope I never figure out
Who broke your heart ~ Baby if I do
Well I'd spend all night losing sleep
I'd spend the night and I'd lose my mind
