I'm am just curious to know what other guys or couples do. After sex with my wife and I have cum, I need to recover. I guess some guys are able to continue right away after cumming and some guys cannot. Well I'm one of the guys who cannot. After cumming, I kind of lose the moment and need something to try and get me in the mood again. All the sexual excitement is gone and I need to get it back. Any suggestions?
I have talked to my wife and she's suggested some sexual toys, watching some porn.
Please let me know what has worked for you, maybe something that works for you will work for us.
Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
Men and recovery after cumming
last reply
41 replies
10.5k views
0 watchers
1 like
Active Ink Slinger
I have met a lot of guys and some can reload in a few minutes others take as long as 20.
Don't worry about it - particularly if she didn't cum. That makes matters worse.
The best way I have found is to take them in my mouth and it doesn't take long for them to get enough 'bone' to get it back in. Once it is there it behaves like normal.
I assume your wife is not adverse to oral. Going down on her may work for you too.
Good luck.
Don't worry about it - particularly if she didn't cum. That makes matters worse.
The best way I have found is to take them in my mouth and it doesn't take long for them to get enough 'bone' to get it back in. Once it is there it behaves like normal.
I assume your wife is not adverse to oral. Going down on her may work for you too.
Good luck.
Internet Philosopher
Quote by Meggsy
I have met a lot of guys and some can reload in a few minutes others take as long as 20.
Don't worry about it - particularly if she didn't cum. That makes matters worse.
The best way I have found is to take them in my mouth and it doesn't take long for them to get enough 'bone' to get it back in. Once it is there it behaves like normal.
I assume your wife is not adverse to oral. Going down on her may work for you too.
Good luck.
This. Spending time making her feel good is a wonderful way to restart my engines. Whether it's giving her tongue time, or just caressing her body, having come doesn't mean we are finished
Quote by Meggsy
I have met a lot of guys and some can reload in a few minutes others take as long as 20.
Don't worry about it - particularly if she didn't cum. That makes matters worse.
The best way I have found is to take them in my mouth and it doesn't take long for them to get enough 'bone' to get it back in. Once it is there it behaves like normal.
I assume your wife is not adverse to oral. Going down on her may work for you too.
Good luck.
Thanks, she is not adverse to oral and of course being a guy I love receiving oral!!
Quote by Meggsy
I have met a lot of guys and some can reload in a few minutes others take as long as 20.
Don't worry about it - particularly if she didn't cum. That makes matters worse.
The best way I have found is to take them in my mouth and it doesn't take long for them to get enough 'bone' to get it back in. Once it is there it behaves like normal.
I assume your wife is not adverse to oral. Going down on her may work for you too.
Good luck.
And speaking of going down on her, I love doing that. Just haven't worked my way up to going down on her after I've cum in her. I have always wanted to do that, but after I cum I usually lose all desire to do it.
Site administrator
For me I feel tired but satisfied after an orgasm and it goes floppy very quickly lol!! As for 'reloading' (that expression makes me laugh) its quite a while for me .. usually ready again about a week later 
.
. 
Active Ink Slinger
I enjoy the recover time. Time to be intimate and begin the process over, the second time we both last longer and enjoy more physical activity
Madam Carol
Quote by pat278
I'm am just curious to know what other guys or couples do. After sex with my wife and I have cum, I need to recover. I guess some guys are able to continue right away after cumming and some guys cannot. Well I'm one of the guys who cannot. After cumming, I kind of lose the moment and need something to try and get me in the mood again. All the sexual excitement is gone and I need to get it back. Any suggestions?
I have talked to my wife and she's suggested some sexual toys, watching some porn.
Please let me know what has worked for you, maybe something that works for you will work for us.
For me, I keep a couple young spares. Lol.
Seriously, I think of sex as a marathon. Different than a quickly at half time. I find crawling on top and shaking my boobs in his face helps a bunch.
Common Sense Iconoclast
Recovery varies. It is probably partly physical, and partly mental, depending on the circumstances.
How tired are you when you have sex? If you are tired beforehand, you are probably unconscious shortly after cumming, and maybe not even considering a second round, so let's not consider that possibility.
I've found that when I am really feeling very good about my partner, I stay hard after the first orgasm, and I can probably go for another full round after that, with maybe a little softening. That is not typical, but it has happened a couple of times. I cum a second time sometimes, anywhere from a few seconds to maybe a half hour after a first orgasm. I can't recall the last time I had a third orgasm inside of three hours.
If my partner has been suitably satisfied (and that typically means at least three or four orgasms to my one), I don't feel as much of a need to keep myself going. I think sometimes we are both ready for rest and cuddling at that point, as we are both satisfied... for maybe an hour or two anyway.
How tired are you when you have sex? If you are tired beforehand, you are probably unconscious shortly after cumming, and maybe not even considering a second round, so let's not consider that possibility.
I've found that when I am really feeling very good about my partner, I stay hard after the first orgasm, and I can probably go for another full round after that, with maybe a little softening. That is not typical, but it has happened a couple of times. I cum a second time sometimes, anywhere from a few seconds to maybe a half hour after a first orgasm. I can't recall the last time I had a third orgasm inside of three hours.
If my partner has been suitably satisfied (and that typically means at least three or four orgasms to my one), I don't feel as much of a need to keep myself going. I think sometimes we are both ready for rest and cuddling at that point, as we are both satisfied... for maybe an hour or two anyway.
"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than open one's mouth and remove all doubt" - Mark Twain (or Lincoln, or Confucius, or...)
Orgasm Aficionado
Reminds me of a Richard Pryor quote: I like makin' love myself, and I can make love for about three minutes. I do about three minutes of serious fuckin', then I need eight hours sleep! And a bowl of Wheaties!
If a man popped and stopped, I tried not to take it personally - so long as he didn't take it personally if I carried on without him.
If a man popped and stopped, I tried not to take it personally - so long as he didn't take it personally if I carried on without him.
Chat Moderator
I have had men that are 'one and done' and there's no recovery at all. I have also had men who need hours to recover and some needed mere moments. No matter the length of time, I enjoy cuddling, making a snack, or talking about what we just did/enjoyed the most. Distractions can help us return to baseline quicker and get ready for round 2, or 3....
Active Ink Slinger
When I was young I could just keep pumping away and cum again in 5-10 minutes. Cumming a third time generally required a little rest and some help from my partner.
Somewhat later I had a GF who was unusual, biologically. She had no breasts or pubic hair,
no periods and no ovaries. But she had an amazing cunt! She could squeeze my cock with it just like milking a cow! Our personal best was me cumming 6 times in 3 hours, and I never pulled out.
The modern record I attained with a hot redhead older woman. 4 times in two hours, with a lot of oral and prostate massage.
The last two were unusual though!
Somewhat later I had a GF who was unusual, biologically. She had no breasts or pubic hair,
no periods and no ovaries. But she had an amazing cunt! She could squeeze my cock with it just like milking a cow! Our personal best was me cumming 6 times in 3 hours, and I never pulled out.
The modern record I attained with a hot redhead older woman. 4 times in two hours, with a lot of oral and prostate massage.
The last two were unusual though!
Advanced Wordsmith
I usually just smoke a bowl and by the time that is done, I've recovered and she's enjoy a post-sex buzz before more sex.
The Linebacker
Quote by AbigailThornton
If a man popped and stopped, I tried not to take it personally - so long as he didn't take it personally if I carried on without him.
I'd think that shouldn't be a problem at all, just watching should help him to recover faster. The mind is a very strong and sexual organ and men love to watch. I love it when my wife does that. Licking her fingers helps with the recovery too. the taste, the smell... that is so damned arousing! Plus oral sex is always a great way to extend things and make it fun when taking recovery breaks, along with pussy spanking, rimming, just plain old french kissing and more.
At 18 to 21, recovery was almost like snapping my fingers (well not quite that fast, but fast.) I've just turned 30 and can tell it takes just a little longer, not a lot. I have heard that as we age that the recovery time increases, but I guess we should just think of that as more 'playtime.'
I can tell you that as my wife approaches 30, her libido has gone from what was already mind blowing to beyond freaky mind blowing.
Active Ink Slinger
OK, hubby and I are late 50's. At one time he was good for at least two, sometimes three with very little reload time. Over time it takes men longer. One thing I found, at lest if we are not tired from long days at work, is to start giving him oral. He may be soft then but it usually does not take too long. Now another thing, but many men won't do it is to let me scoot up and have him lick me clean after he cums. I understand many men will not do it, but you may, in the heat of passion, suggest it.
Chuckanator
It takes me all night now to do what I use to do all night.
I've just published chapter seven of Undercovers Detective. I would love your feedback on this story. I'm planning on ten chapters at least. If you haven't read one yet, I've included links. I hope you like them.
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/undercovers-detective-chapter-7.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/seduction/undercovers-detective-chapter-6.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/undercovers-detective-chapter-5.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/first-time/underdovers-detective-chapter-4.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/seduction/undercovers-detective-chapter-3.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/undercovers-detective-chapter-two.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/undercovers-detective.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/undercovers-detective-chapter-7.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/seduction/undercovers-detective-chapter-6.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/undercovers-detective-chapter-5.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/first-time/underdovers-detective-chapter-4.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/seduction/undercovers-detective-chapter-3.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/undercovers-detective-chapter-two.aspx
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/undercovers-detective.aspx
Rainbow Warrior
Usually, the older a guy is, the longer it takes him to recover. Teenagers can get it up over and over in a very short time, which is one reason I do so many of them, but older guys can often speed up the process if 2 women are involved. They usually have more incentive to get it up again for the 2nd partner. But of course, that's not going to benefit your wife any. But I've noticed my 39 yr. old boyfriend can get it up again quicker when my girlfriend is in bed with us.
English Gentleman
generally i need about 5 to 10 minutes. unless i am really turned on then i need less.
Active Ink Slinger
I have never been real fast for recovery except for a few occasions when the sex was hot and the attraction was magnetic.
My first time with my wife we did it 4 times in one night, I had waited to bed her and wanted it special and turned out as I had hoped.
Youth being age 20 or so was about 1-2 hours, now it is more like a day or two, it all depends on how long in between and mood.
I never have left a lover unsatisfied, oral is my best forte and my wife as well as past partners have all have mentioned my above average skill level.
My first time with my wife we did it 4 times in one night, I had waited to bed her and wanted it special and turned out as I had hoped.
Youth being age 20 or so was about 1-2 hours, now it is more like a day or two, it all depends on how long in between and mood.
I never have left a lover unsatisfied, oral is my best forte and my wife as well as past partners have all have mentioned my above average skill level.
Old in chronological age. But young at heart and desire.
Active Ink Slinger
Age certainly is a factor for men. In our twenties, my husband would sometimes be able to continue fucking without losing his erection, even after cumming. I would say hundreds of times he could have a full orgasm twice without losing his erection. Once he even went for three! Later it would take longer, and he had to go through that refractory time, but often it could be just a few minutes. Today we are in our late 50's and it takes a good 30 minutes - IF - we are going for a second round. To be more honest these days, it often takes several days before he is ready again.
One thing that developed in our relationship once it started to take him longer to recover or if I did not orgasm by the time he did was for me to slide up his chest and let him bring me off with his tongue. Yep, he still does enjoy his creampie.
One thing that developed in our relationship once it started to take him longer to recover or if I did not orgasm by the time he did was for me to slide up his chest and let him bring me off with his tongue. Yep, he still does enjoy his creampie.
Rookie Scribe
I find kissing and some gentle ball play help me along.
Active Ink Slinger
Recovery time is pretty fast for me as I never fully lose an erection after the first orgasm. I think I have slowed down some what as I have gotten older, but having a younger, insatiable wife certainly helps.
... Ok make that 5 a 2 and that 1 and 2 a 10 and a 20.
Active Ink Slinger
It appears to be age related. Most of the younger men I have been with recover within a few minutes and they are ready to go again. Older men usually take longer to recover, but they often take longer to get off as well, which is nice, so it kind of balances out.
Young or old though, the best way I have found to get them hard again, is to suck their cock.
Young or old though, the best way I have found to get them hard again, is to suck their cock.
I've always been able to get it back. I like to rest 10 - 20 minutes. Especially if I was just on top. May doze off for 4 or 5 minutes. I'll piss and chug a beer. Then her lips go down and she will tickle my balls and never more than a minute or two, she will mount on top of me. Then my balls go into overtime and it take them awhile longer to deliver and we will change positions several times and really have fun with it. After the second blow off, I'm out. She wants more, she can try, if it gets and stiffness, she has to ride it her self. Doesn't go too far on thirds. Wait 'til morning! If she needs it now, she'll get one of her vibes on it. When a woman has multiple orgasms, she doesn't always stop when you do!
Active Ink Slinger
For me, it really depends on who I am having sex with. I get a great deal of pleasure giving pleasure to others so I usually get turned back on quick. But I am usually busy doing them.
Advanced Wordsmith
Bit off topic,but has anyone tried viagra?