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That Perfect Someone..

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Guest
Lurker
No one is perfect and nothing is perfect in real world. Perfection can't be quantified. Its like a mirage. I feel in any sort of relationship it will be better to not look for perfection. Looking for any sort of perfect relationship or person will only lead to despair and disappointment.
dpw
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by musikboy


I came across my perfect person but it was over before it started..Please share your story..

How did it finish before it started? It took me years to cock it up!
golf_nut
Active Ink Slinger
I am fortunate enough to to have met two such "perfect" woman. The first I married. The second, has become such a dear and trusted friend, that, like my wife, I would move Heaven and Earth for her if possible. Over before it started? I hope our friendship never sees the day it is over, continues to grow stronger and closer day by day, year after year.
MasterDom
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by dpw

How did it finish before it started? It took me years to cock it up!


We were just friends and before i could tell her my feelings she told me that she likes someone else. And after mustering all my courage i told her one day but then nothing changed .And i lost her.
dpw
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by musikboy


We were just friends and before i could tell her my feelings she told me that she likes someone else. And after mustering all my courage i told her one day but then nothing changed .And i lost her.

That's so sad.
Remember faint hearts never won fair maidens and fortune favours the brave!
BelleduJour
Active Ink Slinger
If this thread reinforces anything it's that meeting your "perfect" or "ideal" mate guarantees nothing in the end. It takes a lot more than a gut feeling to keep you together.

I subscribe to the belief that everything happens for a reason and that people come and go in our lives to either teach us lessons or help them with theirs. If you're not with that one special person right now, it's because it wasn't meant to be. Learn from that experience and use it to become a better version of yourself. And above all, DON'T let it close you off to the possibility of finding true love again.
Guest
Lurker
The "Perfect Someone" well, yes, as it happens, I did; the only problem being that "she" was a combination of three DIFFERENT women I dated following my divorce!
MasterDom
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by dpw

That's so sad.
Remember faint hearts never won fair maidens and fortune favours the brave!

Well said. It is the biggest regret of my life and its been two years now.
Would like to know your story as well .
MasterDom
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by golf_nut
I am fortunate enough to to have met two such "perfect" woman. The first I married. The second, has become such a dear and trusted friend, that, like my wife, I would move Heaven and Earth for her if possible. Over before it started? I hope our friendship never sees the day it is over, continues to grow stronger and closer day by day, year after year.

I hope the same for you smile
Guest
Lurker
For me, we will never meet that perfect someone unless we've learned to accept ourselves first including all our flaws and still be able to honor our feelings.

Belle is right that people come and go in our lives to teach us valuable lessons. It's human nature, we expand constantly based on our experiences in relationships. Some people might keep up with us and some might not. Sometimes, it's even better to just accept that a relationship has run its course.
Unknown User
If you look for perfection, you will never find it and your life will be spent passing so many by... We shouldnt look for perfect, but we should look for the one that we accept their flaws and still love them the same. It goes without saying that the feeling needs to be mutual and there is communication, respect and above all trust...

As long as you make your feelings known, then you have done your part... If it is meant to be, the other person will move heaven and earth to be by your side... If you havent made your feelings known, then there is a reason for it...

Most of all, remember the quote of Benjamin Mee... "You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.” ... Now the answer may not be what your hoping for... But the greatness is the bold courage you took to learn the truth...

Have I met that person? The one who is willing to accept my flaws and move the world to be near me? I dont know, I may have... I do know that I have laid my heart out there more than once and more than once it has received the answer it did not want... Did it hurt a little? Sure it did, but thats ok...

Great things do not come easy in this world and it takes some pain and hard work... I do know that when she does comes along?? She will do everything in her power to not let that hurt near my heart again... And I can promise her the same...

Ok, enough of this mushy crap!! Back to pervy sex in the forums!! lol... smile
TheUprightMan
'tis himself!
Coming very late to this topic, and I'm a guy, but I just have to share this tale.

One day, the sage Nasruddin was asked by one of his students, "Master, why did you never marry?"

"In my youth," replied Nasruddin, "I spent a great deal of time looking for the perfect woman. One would be beautiful and clever, but cruel. Another was sweet, but terribly stupid. For years I searched, and one day I found her, the perfect woman. She was wise, intelligent, compassionate, spiritual, exquisitely lovely, talented in many ways ... She was everything I sought."

"What happened, Master?" asked the student.

"Funny thing," replied the sage. "Seems she was looking for the perfect man..."
kitty40
Active Ink Slinger
I have meet a few who I thought were the perfect man for me. First was my husband, yes I am still married to him. We dated for 3 years before we married. 2 of that he spend in the Navy where he had multiple girlfriends. The girlfriends continued for the first 5 or so years before I put my foot down and said if that is how it is Im out. As far as I know he doesn't fool around anymore except online.

Then there was the first person I met on Lush. He said all the right things. We talked constantly for about 18 months. He had mentioned me coming to live with him across the ocean, but fortuately I would never move my daughter that far and he knew it. After finding out he was saying all the right things to several women on here, he disappeared so that was not hard to escape. And on a good note, I made a few good friends in the process.

My latest "perfect" someone made my heart swell from the first time we talked. We have the same intrestest (sexually and nonsexually) and he has the sweetest personality. Unfortunately, like all the others, I wasn't what he was looking for or good enough or just bored him or something better came along. So I will happily stay married to my husband. He is my best friend and when he gives it to me, the sex is great. So maybe I did find my perfect person, it just took a lot of pain and heartbreak to realize it.
Meggsy
Active Ink Slinger
After many years of searching I/we finally found our wonderful group partners as FWB some time ago.
Yes we are together and hope to remain so for a long time yet.
Beffer
Rainbow Warrior
Here's the thing... The person who is your perfect match may not be the person you fall madly in love with! The two people I have been most intensely in love with were both girls, and while we were fucking crazy about each other, we weren't exactly compatible in the every day sense of life together. On the other hand, the person who is my closest and best friend, who understands me better than anyone, who is on my level intellectually, and who has supported me through thick and thin, has been my boyfriend for over 10 years, and though we love each other, he realizes I'm perfectly capable of falling madly, head-over-heels in love with another girl again.
ChuckEPoo
Chuckanator
A funny thing about me. I make friends that are compatible thinkers, but it seems those I fall romantically for are a contrast politically, and even philosophically.
sprite
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by ChuckEPoo
A funny thing about me. I make friends that are compatible thinkers, but it seems those I fall romantically for are a contrast politically, and even philosophically.


if that's a marriage proposal, sorry, i'm already taken. ;)

You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.
ChuckEPoo
Chuckanator
Quote by sprite


if that's a marriage proposal, sorry, i'm already taken. ;)


Crap! Now what in the hell do I do with this damn ring. ?
avrgblkgrl
In-House Sapiosexual
I think timing has a lot to do with it as well. I've met several people in my life that could be defined as the "perfect" person for me. They were either perfect for who I was then and what I needed at that time; or, they were perfectly what I need and I was not ready. I learned from them. I'm fairly young, but I've always been very perceptive. I understood early on that someone being perfect for you, or me, doesn't mean that they are without flaws. Loving someone's flaws is even more important than loving what is easily loved by everyone else. That applies to them knowing and loving yours too.Then too, someone can love you and not be good for you. They don't allow you to grow, to fulfill all of who you are. The better you know yourself, the more honest you are about who you truly are, the more apt you are to recognize that "perfect" someone for you when they come and realize that you are going to have to adjust accordingly. A "perfect" relationship takes work.

I do now feel that I'm with the perfect person for me, we've developed a relationship that is perfect for us.
? A True Story ?
sprhr2
Advanced Wordsmith
Quote by avrgblkgirl
I think timing has a lot to do with it as well.


I think you have a lot of great insight in there - Perfect changes for people as they change. Further I think you're good in distinguishing the perfect person from the perfect relationship.

I met the perfect woman, did not have my shit together, and although we loved each other very much, I fucked that one away.

Fortunately, experience made me better and years later when I found a perfect woman again, I was able to hold on.

So to answer the original Question:
Yes (x2)
if yes: 1) and 2) Both Yes.
Guest
Lurker
I think the perfect someone is more of a dream than reality. Here on planet earth, most of the people out of seven billion are just like you and me..... Especially when it come to personal and intimate relationship smile
avrgblkgrl
In-House Sapiosexual
Quote by Peri
I think the perfect someone is more of a dream than reality. Here on planet earth, most of the people out of seven billion are just like you and me..... Especially when it come to personal and intimate relationship smile


I have to agree and disagree with you there Peri. The majority of us want the same things, I'll agree to that. However, how we go about getting them, what we do with them and how we sustain them is where we differ. You have to find someone that you can love and that is going to love you the way you need to be loved. To believe that is a myth is to either not believe you are worthy of that kind of love or just be comfortable with settling for not being satisfied. I've never been one to settle.
? A True Story ?
Guest
Lurker
To answer the question - I have not met the perfect person for me (in person).
To elaborate - I believe I know who that person is, but half a world and a whole lot else keeps us apart.
Perhaps she is too perfect for me. Perhaps for her to be so perfect, I cannot be with her.
I guess my little brain will forever stew over such thoughts and never know for sure.
I can say that the experience of having someone in your life, that you feel is your perfect person, is indescribably heart-warming.
Buz
The Linebacker
There is no perfect person, but there is a best possible match. When you do get together it takes the both of you working at it to make it work. You have change with each other as you grow and everyone grows is some way. You have to give to match the taking. But if you think you can mold and change the other person, the relationship is doomed. You have to learn to accept them for who they are.
Guest
Lurker
I find it difficult to answer this question. In many ways my husband is perfect for me, he treats me amazing, is a wonderful friend and an amazing father. He would go to the ends of the earth to make me happy and in many ways I am the luckiest girl I know.

However I imagine your perfect person someone you have undeniable chemistry with and is always a source of passion.

That is what I feel I'm missing and wonder sometimes if there is someone else out there that would have all of that.
Guest
Lurker
Quote by avrgblkgrl


I have to agree and disagree with you there Peri. The majority of us want the same things, I'll agree to that. However, how we go about getting them, what we do with them and how we sustain them is where we differ. You have to find someone that you can love and that is going to love you the way you need to be loved. To believe that is a myth is to either not believe you are worthy of that kind of love or just be comfortable with settling for not being satisfied. I've never been one to settle.

Choose your battles, but don't settle specifically when it comes to personal and intimate relationships.


You know what ABG, relationship means compromise on minimum of a few out of a million differences between the two. Now don't say that you agree and disagree..... you say that in a court and you may get into serious trouble smile
Guest
Lurker
I believe there IS a perfect someone out there for everyone. I have finally met this perfect someone. She likes everything that i enjoy and do in life. Fish, shoot guns, camping, enjoying nature. The list could go on and on. Unfortunately my perfect someone may only be able to be a close friend. I am perfectly fine with that. I enjoy talking to her and i have done nothing but smile since i have met her. I am a very lucky man just to have her a part of my life. Do i wish we could be closer, hell yes i do. But i will take any moment i have with her in whatever form it may be.
avrgblkgrl
In-House Sapiosexual
Quote by Peri


You know what ABG, relationship means compromise on minimum of a few out of a million differences between the two. Now don't say that you agree and disagree..... you say that in a court and you may get into serious trouble smile


Good thing we are not in court. I'm a big romantic at heart. I vote for there is a perfect someone out there for everyone. And you are right, even with that perfect person there will be compromises. Pick your battles. With that right person, the sacrifices will seem minor compared to the benefits. With that perfect person what you won't have to sacrifice is your well being and happiness.

Finding mine has taught me that.
? A True Story ?
avrgblkgrl
In-House Sapiosexual
Quote by Peri


You know what ABG, relationship means compromise on minimum of a few out of a million differences between the two. Now don't say that you agree and disagree..... you say that in a court and you may get into serious trouble smile


Good thing we are not in court. I guess I'm a big romantic at heart. I vote that there is a special someone out there for everyone. I hope that for everyone. Don't settle for less than you deserve. And you are right, even with that person there will be compromises. I did say that a good relationship is hard work. With that right person, the sacrifices will seem minor compared to the benefits. With that perfect person for you, what you won't have to sacrifice is your well being and happiness.
I'm glad I've found my mine.
? A True Story ?